How to Deal With Others in a Healthy Way | Don’t Panic: Week 3

We are wired to get in a group and stay in that group. When we feel our group is being attacked we take it personal. This is how to combat those dynamics and form new groups that cut across the lines of politics.

  • 00:00:48
    [music: Tears for Fears, Everybody Wants to Rule the World]
  • 00:01:53
    - Everybody wants to rule the world,
  • 00:01:54
    at least that's what it seems like if I turn on the TV
  • 00:01:57
    or scroll through my newsfeed in the midst of this election year.
  • 00:02:01
    But don't panic, take heart because there is a third option.
  • 00:02:05
    And today we're talking about what does it mean
  • 00:02:08
    to have peace from Jesus in the midst of this election year?
  • 00:02:12
    I'm really excited about it.
  • 00:02:13
    And the first thing that we're gonna do is
  • 00:02:15
    we're actually going to sing together.
  • 00:02:16
    We're going to worship God together the way
  • 00:02:20
    that people who have been in relationship with God
  • 00:02:22
    and wanting relationship with God
  • 00:02:24
    have been doing for thousands of years.
  • 00:02:26
    And so turn up the volume, go full screen,
  • 00:02:29
    and let's point our attention to God through song right now.
  • 00:12:17
    - God, that's who you are.
  • 00:12:19
    That's who we see you to be all throughout Scripture.
  • 00:12:23
    So God, because we see that we can come into a place like this
  • 00:12:26
    with confidence that we can trust You.
  • 00:12:31
    You are who you say you are.
  • 00:12:33
    So we ask that you would see us just being in this place,
  • 00:12:37
    just watching online as us inviting you to come,
  • 00:12:39
    breakthrough in our lives so that we would see You for who you are.
  • 00:12:48
    It's in Jesus's mighty name that we pray.
  • 00:12:50
  • 00:12:51
    Man, come on guys, it's so good to worship with you guys.
  • 00:12:59
    We're going to make a big place feel a little bit smaller.
  • 00:13:01
    I just want you to be a good neighbor and just turn to somebody
  • 00:13:04
    and just say, Democrat or Republican?
  • 00:13:06
    That's all.
  • 00:13:07
    Just kidding. Just kidding.
  • 00:13:08
    Say a quick hi and then have a seat, all right?
  • 00:13:16
    - Well, hello, Crossroads, I'm Jennie Chacon,
  • 00:13:18
    one of the leaders of Woman Camp.
  • 00:13:20
    Now camping with thousands of other women
  • 00:13:22
    can be a life changing, beautiful experience.
  • 00:13:25
    But let's be real, it can also be a little bit uncomfortable.
  • 00:13:28
    But this is an opportunity to be brave
  • 00:13:30
    and to push ourselves and to go to new places.
  • 00:13:33
    And you're not going to be alone.
  • 00:13:35
    Personally, the reason that I am willing
  • 00:13:36
    to go outside of my comfort zone is because I believed
  • 00:13:39
    to the core of my being that no matter where you come from
  • 00:13:43
    or what you do, no matter if you love to camp
  • 00:13:46
    or if you'd rather be getting your nails done,
  • 00:13:48
    you have a father that loves you
  • 00:13:50
    and has incredible plans and purpose for your life,
  • 00:13:53
    that He wants to set you free and unleash you
  • 00:13:56
    into the fullness of who He created you to be.
  • 00:13:59
    - I'm not a camper.
  • 00:14:00
    I've never slept outside before.
  • 00:14:02
    I'm really glad that I got the experience
  • 00:14:04
    and this has just been transformative for me.
  • 00:14:07
    - I came here just looking to have a good time with my friends
  • 00:14:11
    and meet good women.
  • 00:14:14
    And I met myself and I met Jesus.
  • 00:14:20
    And I am so, so grateful for my experience here.
  • 00:14:26
    - I got here and found people who want to help me
  • 00:14:29
    through this hard time that I'm going through.
  • 00:14:31
    - All of the hurt, all of the pain,
  • 00:14:33
    all of the disappointment was washed away in that water today.
  • 00:14:38
    And I feel like a completely new person.
  • 00:14:40
    - I feel set free, it's like I can breathe again.
  • 00:14:44
    I feel like those chains have been like ripped away.
  • 00:14:49
    - I feel given another chance.
  • 00:14:52
    I feel like a new creation.
  • 00:14:53
    I really do.
  • 00:14:58
    - Coming here and spending time with God has allowed me
  • 00:15:01
    to understand that my Heavenly Father has chosen me,
  • 00:15:05
    I am worthy of everything that God has planned out for me in my life.
  • 00:15:11
    - I believe that together we can face our fears and find freedom.
  • 00:15:15
    If you want to go to new places with God,
  • 00:15:17
    Woman Camp is for you and I cannot wait to see you here.
  • 00:15:29
    - I have loved getting to experience God at camps through Crossroads
  • 00:15:35
    because I experienced something different
  • 00:15:37
    when I go outside of my comfort zone and I get into nature
  • 00:15:41
    and with other people to experience Him
  • 00:15:43
    and I want that for you.
  • 00:15:44
    I actually won't be at Woman Camp this year because
  • 00:15:47
    that weekend they'll be having a baby girl.
  • 00:15:49
    But nonetheless, I think that God has great things for you
  • 00:15:53
    to experience there with Him.
  • 00:15:56
    And I think He has something unique to say to you.
  • 00:15:58
    And there's something powerful about getting to hear from God
  • 00:16:02
    in the midst of community, in the midst of being with other people.
  • 00:16:06
    You know, there might be someone who lives right near you,
  • 00:16:10
    who's part of your church, who watches church online
  • 00:16:15
    and lives just a block away from you.
  • 00:16:17
    We have this sweet tool on the Crossroads website
  • 00:16:20
    where you actually can look at a map and see groups
  • 00:16:23
    and locations and people who are near you who want to connect.
  • 00:16:28
    And so if you had to,
  • 00:16:30
    you can filter that map in different ways and see groups,
  • 00:16:33
    see locations, or see people.
  • 00:16:35
    I have friends who have moved to new cities
  • 00:16:38
    and use the map to make new friends
  • 00:16:40
    and to connect with other people who are part of their church.
  • 00:16:43
    And they've gotten the best out of their new city,
  • 00:16:45
    the best out of their relationship with God
  • 00:16:47
    and the best out of these new friendships because
  • 00:16:50
    they chose to connect with other people near them
  • 00:16:53
    who are part of Crossroads.
  • 00:16:54
    And I want that for you.
  • 00:16:56
    You know, I tend to travel a decent amount.
  • 00:17:00
    And whenever I am watching Crossroads services by myself,
  • 00:17:05
    my favorite viewing experience is
  • 00:17:07
    in the Crossroads Anywhere app because
  • 00:17:09
    I can take Crossroads Anywhere I go with me
  • 00:17:12
    and the services are there, podcasts are there,
  • 00:17:14
    articles are there.
  • 00:17:16
    And it's a great experience for me as an individual.
  • 00:17:19
    But more often than not, I actually enjoy getting to watch church
  • 00:17:23
    and experience church and worship alongside of my family
  • 00:17:26
    and my friends in my living room.
  • 00:17:29
    And the best experience for that is that I have
  • 00:17:32
    the Crossroads App downloaded on my TV through Apple TV.
  • 00:17:36
    And we actually have a Crossroads App for Apple TV,
  • 00:17:39
    Roku and Amazon Fire.
  • 00:17:41
    And so if you regularly watch at home
  • 00:17:45
    and you want to do this with other people,
  • 00:17:47
    which is the best way to experience church,
  • 00:17:50
    I would encourage you to download one of the Crossroads apps
  • 00:17:53
    on your TV and go full screen, turn up the volume,
  • 00:17:57
    and have a more immersive experience in your living room
  • 00:18:00
    through watching on one of the Crossroads TV Apps.
  • 00:18:04
    A couple of years ago we were sitting
  • 00:18:06
    around the dining room table with some family
  • 00:18:09
    and one of my family members shared that
  • 00:18:11
    he had started tithing for the first time
  • 00:18:13
    and it totally made me unexpectedly emotional.
  • 00:18:18
    And when I processed that with God, it was because
  • 00:18:20
    what was happening was I realized that that family member
  • 00:18:23
    was serious about his relationship with God.
  • 00:18:27
    And I knew he was serious about his relationship with God
  • 00:18:29
    because he chose to tithe, to give God his first 10%
  • 00:18:35
    and do that through giving to the church.
  • 00:18:37
    And maybe you're in a place where you want to get serious
  • 00:18:40
    about your relationship with God.
  • 00:18:42
    You want to tell Him what He means to you
  • 00:18:45
    and you want to be obedient to the things
  • 00:18:47
    that He asks us to do as followers of Jesus.
  • 00:18:51
    And one of those things is to tithe,
  • 00:18:53
    to give our first 10% to the church.
  • 00:18:56
    You today could tell God that you're serious about Him
  • 00:18:59
    by tithing, maybe for the very first time.
  • 00:19:02
    If you want to head to,
  • 00:19:05
    you can do that online and find out more about
  • 00:19:08
    what it means to be a giver and what it means to be a tither.
  • 00:19:11
    And today in our series Don't Panic, Take Heart 2020,
  • 00:19:15
    we have a guest speaker and we're going to be talking about
  • 00:19:17
    how to get along with people that we disagree with.
  • 00:19:22
    - Well, Chuck was right and wrong about something last week.
  • 00:19:25
    First of all, you have no idea how stressful it is.
  • 00:19:29
    He's totally right, how stressful it is to dress yourself
  • 00:19:31
    before you come and speak onstage in a political series.
  • 00:19:36
    Like can't have any red, can't have any blue.
  • 00:19:39
    Somebody's going be reading into that.
  • 00:19:41
    I have gray and white on.
  • 00:19:42
    Cannot read into this.
  • 00:19:44
    Now, someone's going to be coming up in a little bit
  • 00:19:45
    to help me out here who has red on.
  • 00:19:48
    I assure you, he was not thinking politics when he put red on.
  • 00:19:51
    So I agree with Chuck on that.
  • 00:19:53
    I tell you the thing I disagree, I hope he's wrong.
  • 00:19:55
    Really? Chuck is the pastor you like?
  • 00:19:57
    That's what he said last week.
  • 00:19:58
    He said he's the pastor you like.
  • 00:20:01
    Do you not like me?
  • 00:20:02
    Do you not like me?
  • 00:20:06
    You're not even like reacting, you're like,
  • 00:20:08
    "Yeah, that's really true."
  • 00:20:10
    Fine, fine.
  • 00:20:12
    Wow. OK.
  • 00:20:13
    Well, I like me.
  • 00:20:20
    God likes me.
  • 00:20:23
    I think my mom likes me, but--
  • 00:20:28
    Oh, my.
  • 00:20:31
    Chuck also talked about something else
  • 00:20:32
    that was really, really insightful.
  • 00:20:34
    He said, "Hey, we can vote on certain things.
  • 00:20:36
    Voting on the left, voting in the right, voting for this.
  • 00:20:39
    But regardless of what we vote on, we have to get engaged.
  • 00:20:43
    We have to get engage with our world.
  • 00:20:44
    We have to be a part of people's lives.
  • 00:20:49
    I'm reminded of that as I just found out
  • 00:20:52
    there's someone who's going to be doing a story
  • 00:20:53
    on our church this week having to do with
  • 00:20:55
    the amount of medical debt that we retired as a church.
  • 00:20:59
    We recently got done with a series called The Blessed Life.
  • 00:21:02
    And so many of us are doing things differently financially
  • 00:21:05
    because we're sensing the blessings of God
  • 00:21:07
    and we want God more involved in our life.
  • 00:21:09
    And we had a special thing in there, it was just like one week.
  • 00:21:11
    It was like a two minute thing, just a two minute deal,
  • 00:21:13
    virtually, eh, five minutes at the end of one of the times
  • 00:21:17
    I said, "Hey, if anybody in here,
  • 00:21:18
    any of us who are already tithing, already tithing,
  • 00:21:21
    and we want to go to a new place just for a one time deal,
  • 00:21:24
    we're going to be able to retire medical debt for
  • 00:21:27
    people who have been in massive, massive problems through medical debt.
  • 00:21:30
    And we can basically have a one hundred to one
  • 00:21:33
    or something like that in terms of what we give
  • 00:21:35
    through Rest in Peace Medical Debt,
  • 00:21:37
    that buys medical debt from other, from hospitals and such.
  • 00:21:41
    And do you know how much medical debt we retired?
  • 00:21:44
    We eliminated $46.5
  • 00:21:46
    million in medical debt.
  • 00:21:48
    $46.5 million a month in medical debt.
  • 00:21:53
    The partner we work with said in a one time shot, one time act,
  • 00:21:56
    that's the largest amount of medical debt
  • 00:21:59
    that has ever been retired in one shot.
  • 00:22:01
    Come on. Who's excited about that?
  • 00:22:03
    That is amazing.
  • 00:22:05
    It's amazing.
  • 00:22:06
    We started to get stories that have come in with all the folks,
  • 00:22:09
    $42 million of that money went to folks in the Cincinnati area
  • 00:22:15
    and then $3.5 million to our sites
  • 00:22:18
    and people who are part of Crossroads in places outside of Ohio.
  • 00:22:21
    And here's just one of the stories that came back.
  • 00:22:23
    Someone said this:
  • 00:22:58
    Isn't that's sweet? [ applause ]
  • 00:23:02
    I read that and I actually get happy, I get happy.
  • 00:23:06
    It makes me feel good. Makes me feel blessed.
  • 00:23:09
    And it should you as well.
  • 00:23:12
    One of the key verses that's trying to tie
  • 00:23:15
    our series together comes the book of Matthew 5 when it says:
  • 00:23:19
    Blessed are the peacemakers, they shall be called Sons of God.
  • 00:23:22
    Blessed are the peacemakers.
  • 00:23:24
    That's how the ESV, the English standard version of the Bible.
  • 00:23:27
    The Bible has been translated in all kinds of languages
  • 00:23:31
    for people in every corner of the globe
  • 00:23:33
    out of its original languages of Hebrew and Greek.
  • 00:23:36
    That's the translations.
  • 00:23:37
    The one we use mostly on stage here
  • 00:23:39
    is the English Standard Version.
  • 00:23:41
    It's kind of a literal version, word for word.
  • 00:23:44
    But the one I've been using my personal time with God
  • 00:23:47
    recently has really been fresh for me.
  • 00:23:48
    It's called the Common English Version, the CEV.
  • 00:23:52
    And that verse I just ran across it in my time with God
  • 00:23:56
    just the other day actually.
  • 00:23:57
    And I was struck by how it translated.
  • 00:23:59
    It says:
  • 00:24:05
    Happy, I read that and I was like,
  • 00:24:08
    "Happy? That's ridiculous.
  • 00:24:09
    The Bible doesn't say, 'Happy.'"
  • 00:24:12
    I just happen to know Hebrew and Greek,
  • 00:24:13
    so I said let's check it out. So I went in.
  • 00:24:14
    I actually know where, I did take courses on that,
  • 00:24:16
    I actually know where to get the answers.
  • 00:24:17
    So I was like, let's go figure it out. What you know?
  • 00:24:20
    That's a good little iteration of that word, happy.
  • 00:24:22
    And I thought about it, I thought, could that be why
  • 00:24:26
    nobody seems to be happy any longer?
  • 00:24:28
    Because we're so into antagonistically interacting with each other.
  • 00:24:32
    And I'll tell you what, whoever gets happy during an election cycle?
  • 00:24:38
    No one gets happy except for the 50% after the election cycle is over
  • 00:24:41
    who happen to have won.
  • 00:24:44
    My heart is broken how much we have been stolen from
  • 00:24:48
    based on how our political process operates.
  • 00:24:50
    And God does want something different for you and different for me.
  • 00:24:54
    I was at a conference in Washington, D.C.
  • 00:24:56
    a few months ago
  • 00:24:58
    and there's this guy who got up to speak.
  • 00:24:59
    I'd never heard about him before.
  • 00:25:01
    And he spoke and I just sat there going,
  • 00:25:04
    "Wow. I really -- I really need it.
  • 00:25:08
    That was really helpful as far as describing
  • 00:25:11
    how we are so antagonistic and not at peace with one another,"
  • 00:25:14
    or in his words, how we are so polarized.
  • 00:25:18
    So fortunately, he decided to come here this weekend here to Crossroads.
  • 00:25:21
    He's a pretty interesting guy.
  • 00:25:23
    I don't know how many people you've been around
  • 00:25:25
    who've spoken to the United Nations.
  • 00:25:26
    I never have done that. I know if you have.
  • 00:25:28
    I don't know how many people you've been around
  • 00:25:29
    who spoken at the National Press Club.
  • 00:25:30
    I don't know how many you've been around
  • 00:25:32
    who've been covered and interviewed by places like
  • 00:25:34
    The Washington Post and others, all kinds of stuff.
  • 00:25:36
    He's a pretty, pretty smart guy.
  • 00:25:38
    And he's got some stuff that all of us will benefit to hear.
  • 00:25:42
    So please welcome my new friend Andrew Hanauer to our stage.
  • 00:25:47
    Come on up, Andrew. [applause]
  • 00:25:49
    Oh, I forgot, we were going to --
  • 00:25:50
    Come on up.
  • 00:25:51
    We're supposed to do the -- you can help me.
  • 00:25:53
    Pull the political thing, go ahead and pull it for me.
  • 00:25:55
    You wanted to pull it. This is our myth meter.
  • 00:25:57
    There we go.
  • 00:25:59
    What myths do we have here, Andrew?
  • 00:26:04
    That's a myth. Not sure.
  • 00:26:06
    Go ahead pull it, I know you want to pull it again.
  • 00:26:07
    I'll let you pull it two more times.
  • 00:26:08
    Go ahead. There it is.
  • 00:26:11
    And here's another myth for us today.
  • 00:26:16
    Not true. American President, in case you don't know.
  • 00:26:19
    One more time. One more time.
  • 00:26:20
    Here it is. It is this myth is --
  • 00:26:22
    is actually true,
  • 00:26:27
    but we believe that people who disagree with me hate me.
  • 00:26:31
    That doesn't necessarily have to be true.
  • 00:26:33
    It doesn't.
  • 00:26:34
    But we do believe that, we're acting that way.
  • 00:26:37
    Andrew understands this.
  • 00:26:38
    He understands the neuroscience behind it.
  • 00:26:40
    Andrew, talk to us today. [applause]
  • 00:26:48
    How's everyone doing?
  • 00:26:50
    Are you excited to talk politics at church?
  • 00:26:53
    Yes. All right.
  • 00:26:55
    You know, I'm an optimistic guy,
  • 00:26:57
    but I want to start with the bad news,
  • 00:26:58
    which is why I think that you guys brought me here today,
  • 00:27:03
    which is that I work with people who are really smart,
  • 00:27:07
    who've spent their whole lives trying to resolve conflict
  • 00:27:09
    and violence around the world, East Africa,
  • 00:27:12
    the Middle East, Eastern Europe, Asia.
  • 00:27:16
    And about four or five years ago,
  • 00:27:19
    they started leaving those places and they came here
  • 00:27:23
    because the rhetoric, the division, the polarization,
  • 00:27:26
    the divisiveness was getting so bad that they said,
  • 00:27:29
    "Ut-oh, we need to get here before it gets too late."
  • 00:27:33
    So I think that's why we're here.
  • 00:27:34
    It's a big topic. I could talk about it for five hours.
  • 00:27:37
    I asked to talk about it for five hours.
  • 00:27:39
    I said, "If you're gonna invite me,
  • 00:27:40
    I want to talk about it for five hours.
  • 00:27:42
    And I want to pull the lever thing three times."
  • 00:27:45
    And they said, "You could have 20 minutes,
  • 00:27:47
    but we'll let you pull the lever."
  • 00:27:48
    So it worked out OK.
  • 00:27:51
    You know, in many ways, I think the reason
  • 00:27:52
    I do the work that I do around polarization
  • 00:27:54
    is because the story of how I became a Christian
  • 00:27:57
    is actually a story about polarization, believe it or not.
  • 00:28:01
    When I got to college,
  • 00:28:03
    my roommate and I were polar opposites, right?
  • 00:28:07
    I was from the West Coast.
  • 00:28:09
    He was from the East Coast.
  • 00:28:11
    I rooted for fantastic, awesome sports teams.
  • 00:28:15
    He rooted for sports teams from Philadelphia.
  • 00:28:20
    No one's perfect.
  • 00:28:22
    I was raised in a secular, totally non-religious house.
  • 00:28:25
    I had no interest in religion.
  • 00:28:27
    I didn't like religion.
  • 00:28:28
    I didn't really want anything to do with religion.
  • 00:28:31
    He was raised in a sort of traditional evangelical Christian home.
  • 00:28:35
    His dad was a seminary professor.
  • 00:28:37
    I mean, he didn't just go to church on Sundays.
  • 00:28:39
    He went to church on days
  • 00:28:40
    when I didn't even know that church happened.
  • 00:28:43
    I mean, we'd be hanging out in the dorm room
  • 00:28:44
    and he'd be getting dressed.
  • 00:28:46
    I was like, "OH, where are you going?"
  • 00:28:47
    He was like, "I'm going to church."
  • 00:28:48
    I was like, "Cool. Isn't it Wednesday?"
  • 00:28:51
    It was mind blowing.
  • 00:28:54
    The politics were different, too.
  • 00:28:57
    Not surprisingly, we were --
  • 00:28:58
    we didn't disagree about everything,
  • 00:28:59
    but we were pretty far apart on a lot of issues.
  • 00:29:02
    In 20 years I think we voted for
  • 00:29:04
    the same candidate for President one time, just one time.
  • 00:29:08
    Once or twice we voted for different candidates
  • 00:29:11
    and they both lost, which in a two party system
  • 00:29:15
    it takes real work, but we made it happen.
  • 00:29:19
    The one thing that we had in common
  • 00:29:20
    was that we had both lied on our college roommate form.
  • 00:29:23
    We had said that we were neat,
  • 00:29:25
    because we hoped we'd get a roommate who was neat.
  • 00:29:29
    And instead because God is a just God
  • 00:29:31
    and because also sometimes has a sense of humor,
  • 00:29:33
    we got each other and that's kind of how it worked out.
  • 00:29:37
    But even as we disagreed about so many things,
  • 00:29:39
    so many things, and even as messy as he was, [laughter]
  • 00:29:43
    we became close friends.
  • 00:29:47
    And I want to just pause with that first, right?
  • 00:29:49
    You can be friends with someone who you deeply disagree with, right?
  • 00:29:54
    And that should not be radical,
  • 00:29:55
    but I feel like in 2020, that's a little radical.
  • 00:29:57
    Raise your hand if you are friends with someone
  • 00:29:59
    who you deeply disagree with about issues?
  • 00:30:03
    That's good. That's healthy, all right.
  • 00:30:07
    Here's the other thing, though.
  • 00:30:08
    As we got to know each other,
  • 00:30:10
    as we got to talk about politics and religion
  • 00:30:13
    and of all other things,
  • 00:30:15
    I became really fascinated by the story of the Gospels.
  • 00:30:18
    It really touched me. It was very unexpected.
  • 00:30:21
    I didn't think I wanted anything to do with it,
  • 00:30:22
    but I fell in love with it.
  • 00:30:24
    And eventually I decided that that's what I wanted for my life.
  • 00:30:28
    And I became a Christian.
  • 00:30:30
    I changed my mind about something that was really, really important.
  • 00:30:35
    And I want to sort of be clear about why.
  • 00:30:37
    I didn't change my mind because someone lectured me,
  • 00:30:39
    because a stranger came to me with their facts, right?
  • 00:30:44
    I changed my mind because I had a relationship with someone
  • 00:30:47
    who cared about me, who I cared about, who I knew loved me.
  • 00:30:51
    And so I was able to to judge something on the merits of it
  • 00:30:55
    and not based on whether or not it was coming from my team.
  • 00:30:59
    That's pretty radical in 2020 too, right?
  • 00:31:01
    Judging something by its merits,
  • 00:31:04
    and not by whether or not it's coming from my team.
  • 00:31:08
    So this brings us to the main point I want to sort of make today.
  • 00:31:12
    So take out your notepads, your pens, your phones.
  • 00:31:15
    Get this down, this is really important.
  • 00:31:17
  • 00:31:18
    Polarization is stupid and we are better than this.
  • 00:31:24
    Polarization is stupid and we are better than this.
  • 00:31:28
    We're gonna bust some myths today.
  • 00:31:30
    I think in busting those myths, we're gonna be really telling a story.
  • 00:31:34
    Right? It's the story about our country that we love,
  • 00:31:38
    a country where right now the loudest, most divisive voices
  • 00:31:41
    are trying to pull us apart.
  • 00:31:43
    Where millions of us are silent because we don't know where we fit in
  • 00:31:48
    or because we think if we speak up, we're gonna get shouted down.
  • 00:31:52
    It's a country where we've definitely lost trust in our politicians.
  • 00:31:56
    Yeah, maybe we should, but we're also losing trust in each other.
  • 00:32:02
    And if you feel like this is wrong,
  • 00:32:03
    if you feel like it doesn't, shouldn't be this way,
  • 00:32:06
    then take heart because for one thing, you're not alone.
  • 00:32:10
    So let's tackle the first myth today is the myth that you saw up there.
  • 00:32:16
    Not the one about the dog milk.
  • 00:32:18
    That was super weird.
  • 00:32:21
    But the other one, the one about people who disagree with me hate me.
  • 00:32:27
    Now, let's be clear, first of all,
  • 00:32:29
    that even if someone does hate you, Jesus is still pretty clear
  • 00:32:32
    about what you're supposed to do about that, right?
  • 00:32:33
    He says to love our enemies.
  • 00:32:37
    I think the exact phrases love your enemies.
  • 00:32:39
  • 00:32:41
    So He's very clear, so we should keep that in mind.
  • 00:32:42
    But yes, people who disagree with me hate me is a myth.
  • 00:32:46
    We even have a word for that.
  • 00:32:48
    It's called metaperceptions.
  • 00:32:50
  • 00:32:51
    A metaperceptions is: I think your team hates me, so I hate you back.
  • 00:32:57
    I think your side hates me, so I hate you back.
  • 00:33:01
    But here's the good news.
  • 00:33:03
    We are wrong about our metaperceptions .
  • 00:33:05
    In one survey of Democrats and Republicans,
  • 00:33:09
    they were off by 250% about how much the other side hated them.
  • 00:33:14
    250 percent.
  • 00:33:16
    I can't think of any job where if you're wrong by 250%,
  • 00:33:20
    you don't get fired. Right?
  • 00:33:22
    But that's how wrong we are.
  • 00:33:24
    And the good news is that when when Democrats, Republicans,
  • 00:33:27
    anyone finds out that the other side
  • 00:33:29
    doesn't hate them as much as they thought,
  • 00:33:31
    it starts this kind of positive, positive feedback cycle, right?
  • 00:33:35
    I can't tell you how much joy this brings me in my work.
  • 00:33:39
    You know, we go around the country bringing people together
  • 00:33:41
    from different religions, different politics, races
  • 00:33:44
    to do work together.
  • 00:33:46
    And when you see someone who thought that another group hated them
  • 00:33:49
    or dislike them and you see them become friends
  • 00:33:53
    and you see the barriers crumble and, you know,
  • 00:33:56
    Christians and Muslims and Republicans and Democrats,
  • 00:33:58
    and they realize that God is so much bigger
  • 00:34:01
    than these divides that we've created in our heads.
  • 00:34:04
    It's amazing.
  • 00:34:07
    Polarization is stupid, folks.
  • 00:34:10
    We can do better than this.
  • 00:34:12
    So what we're gonna do today is we're gonna go after three myths
  • 00:34:15
    that kind of fuel that first myth, right?
  • 00:34:17
    We'll call them bonus myths you get for myths
  • 00:34:20
    for the price of one today.
  • 00:34:22
    The first is that:
  • 00:34:23
    people who disagree with me agree with
  • 00:34:25
    the loudest, most divisive voices on their team.
  • 00:34:28
    Not true.
  • 00:34:30
    People who disagree with me
  • 00:34:32
    are all on the extreme end of the political spectrum.
  • 00:34:35
    Not true.
  • 00:34:37
    And people who disagree with me are motivated by negative things.
  • 00:34:40
    That's also not true.
  • 00:34:43
    But first, you know, when we talk about polarization,
  • 00:34:45
    I want to be clear, there's sort of a difference between polarization
  • 00:34:48
    and what we'll call toxic polarization.
  • 00:34:50
  • 00:34:51
    So polarization is just I disagree with you.
  • 00:34:53
    That's normal. That's healthy.
  • 00:34:55
    That's good.
  • 00:34:56
    I don't think any of us want to live in a country
  • 00:34:58
    where we all agree about everything.
  • 00:34:59
    That would be creepy. Weird.
  • 00:35:04
    Here's an example of healthy polarization, right?
  • 00:35:06
    So healthy polarization.
  • 00:35:08
    We have a debate in this country about what you call soda.
  • 00:35:13
  • 00:35:14
    Some of us call it soda.
  • 00:35:16
    Some of us call it pop.
  • 00:35:18
    People in the south where my wife is from called Coke,
  • 00:35:20
    even if it's a Pepsi, they still call it Coke.
  • 00:35:23
    I don't know how Coke pulled that off, but well done.
  • 00:35:28
    Look, guys, I call it soda.
  • 00:35:30
    I know I'm right.
  • 00:35:33
    Right. You're wrong if you don't.
  • 00:35:35
    But that's OK. Like we can still we can disagree about that.
  • 00:35:38
    It doesn't have to become this battle of I hate you, I hate your team.
  • 00:35:41
    That's healthy polarization.
  • 00:35:43
    More importantly, guys, there's gonna be times
  • 00:35:47
    when things are just right and wrong.
  • 00:35:48
  • 00:35:49
    Being concerned about polarization doesn't mean
  • 00:35:51
    you give up your values, you compromise what you care about,
  • 00:35:54
    you come to the sort of mushy middle.
  • 00:35:56
    No. Stand up for what you believe in.
  • 00:35:59
    It's right to stand up for what you believe in.
  • 00:36:02
    But toxic polarization is the stupid kind.
  • 00:36:05
    It's it's changing from, "I disagree with you," to,
  • 00:36:09
    "I don't like who you are.
  • 00:36:10
    I don't like your team."
  • 00:36:12
    Right? "I don't like your team."
  • 00:36:14
    It's basically us vs them team sports polarization.
  • 00:36:19
    Here's why it's toxic.
  • 00:36:21
    When we get into these two teams, the way things work,
  • 00:36:27
    we don't stay here, we go like this.
  • 00:36:29
  • 00:36:31
    We get farther and farther apart.
  • 00:36:33
    Over the last 40 years, Americans haven't changed their mind
  • 00:36:36
    much at all about their political views,
  • 00:36:38
    but they hate the other side a lot more.
  • 00:36:41
    How does that happen?
  • 00:36:42
    Doesn't it feel like something's changed, something's different?
  • 00:36:46
    It's not -- You're not wrong.
  • 00:36:48
    It's because even though we haven't changed our minds
  • 00:36:50
    about all these issues, we hate each other a lot more.
  • 00:36:55
    Polarization is stupid.
  • 00:36:58
    So in the last five years, the United States ranks 195th in the world
  • 00:37:05
    in terms of how quickly we're going like this.
  • 00:37:08
    So we are we're going this way.
  • 00:37:12
    And guys, there's only 195 countries in the world, so we rank last.
  • 00:37:18
    All right. So bonus myth number one is: my opponent agrees with
  • 00:37:22
    the loudest, most divisive voices on their team.
  • 00:37:24
    This is false.
  • 00:37:25
    The reason you think it's true, a reason it persists
  • 00:37:28
    is actually because of peer pressure.
  • 00:37:30
  • 00:37:31
    Picture a middle school cafeteria.
  • 00:37:33
    Does that bring back happy memories, terrifying memories, maybe?
  • 00:37:38
    So now picture a middle school cafeteria
  • 00:37:40
    with 350 million people in it
  • 00:37:42
    and a lot of them are watching cable news all the time.
  • 00:37:44
  • 00:37:45
    That is what's going on.
  • 00:37:46
    So how does peer pressure create this larger division?
  • 00:37:51
    To talk about that, I want to show you
  • 00:37:53
    probably the weirdest thing you've ever seen at a church.
  • 00:37:59
    What do you guys see?
  • 00:38:03
    You see faces, right?
  • 00:38:05
    Does everyone see faces?
  • 00:38:06
    Did you see faces like instantly?
  • 00:38:07
    Do you see emotions?
  • 00:38:10
    Surprise, maybe fear?
  • 00:38:13
    How many actual faces are on that screen?
  • 00:38:17
    Some people say four and then they go, no, no, no.
  • 00:38:19
  • 00:38:20
    Like, no, no. There's no faces, guys.
  • 00:38:22
    Those those are peppers.
  • 00:38:23
    Right? They're not faces.
  • 00:38:25
    Why do you see faces where they don't exist?
  • 00:38:28
    This is why.
  • 00:38:31
    We are wired to see faces.
  • 00:38:33
    We are wired to see faces because we want to know
  • 00:38:35
    if something is a threat to us.
  • 00:38:37
    We want to know if it's going to hurt us or not.
  • 00:38:40
    And that's also why we formed groups a long time ago,
  • 00:38:42
    we wanted to form into a group for protection.
  • 00:38:44
    Originally, we needed protection from lions.
  • 00:38:47
    Today, we're less likely, statistically speaking,
  • 00:38:50
    to get eaten by a lion.
  • 00:38:52
    We're more likely to die because we're texting
  • 00:38:54
    and we wander into the street.
  • 00:38:56
    But we still form groups for the same reason.
  • 00:38:58
  • 00:38:59
    Here's the thing, when you walk down the street, if you're not texting,
  • 00:39:02
    if you're actually looking at the people out there,
  • 00:39:04
    your brain does the same thing that it does with that lion.
  • 00:39:07
    You look at a person and you decide
  • 00:39:09
    within a quarter of a second whether they're in your group
  • 00:39:13
    or they're not in your group.
  • 00:39:15
  • 00:39:16
    So we are wired for this kind of us vs them thing, it's built into us.
  • 00:39:21
    And here's the main point, once we're in a group,
  • 00:39:24
    the thing that we most want is to stay in the group.
  • 00:39:29
    What happens if we get kicked out?
  • 00:39:31
    Where do we go?
  • 00:39:34
    And so when people in our group are being loud and divisive
  • 00:39:37
    and hateful and negative, a lot of us stay silent.
  • 00:39:40
    Because the scariest thing is what happens
  • 00:39:43
    if we get kicked out of our group, where do we go?
  • 00:39:44
    Who will protect us from lions, right,
  • 00:39:48
    or whatever the modern equivalent?
  • 00:39:50
    So we stay silent and the other side sees that and says,
  • 00:39:53
    "Look at those people. They're all okay with this."
  • 00:39:57
    And so we get further and further apart.
  • 00:40:01
    It doesn't have to be this way.
  • 00:40:04
    All right. Bonus myth number two:
  • 00:40:06
    my political opponent, people who disagree with me
  • 00:40:08
    have extreme politics.
  • 00:40:10
    Guys, we are actually less divided than we think we are.
  • 00:40:13
    I want to show you some proof.
  • 00:40:15
    Here is a picture of what Democrats and Republicans think about
  • 00:40:18
    immigration, which is probably the most divisive issue we have.
  • 00:40:22
    So you can see some folks are on the far left of that.
  • 00:40:25
    Some folks are on the far right.
  • 00:40:26
    There's a lot of folks in the middle.
  • 00:40:28
    There's overlap.
  • 00:40:30
    There's a lot of folks who disagree,
  • 00:40:31
    but they're within range of each other.
  • 00:40:33
    Maybe they could compromise or negotiate.
  • 00:40:36
    That's what Democrats and Republicans think about immigration.
  • 00:40:39
    This is what Democrats and Republicans
  • 00:40:41
    think the other side thinks about immigration.
  • 00:40:45
    All right? Let's see those together.
  • 00:40:50
    So we are half as divided on the actual issues as we think we are,
  • 00:40:55
    but our polarization is so toxic, so stupid that we don't even realize
  • 00:40:59
    when we have a lot in common that we agree on.
  • 00:41:03
    Right? We're better than this.
  • 00:41:06
    Lastly, we have a myth that our opponents, our political opponents,
  • 00:41:11
    people we disagree with have negative intentions.
  • 00:41:15
    Raise your hand if you've ever been cut off in traffic while driving.
  • 00:41:20
    What did you assume about the person who cut you off?
  • 00:41:25
    They're a jerk. They're rushing.
  • 00:41:28
    They just want to get ahead.
  • 00:41:29
    They don't care.
  • 00:41:30
    They could have hurt me. I mean, they could have hurt you, right?
  • 00:41:32
    And you might be right. You might totally be right.
  • 00:41:35
    That's fair.
  • 00:41:37
    You know what's coming, right?
  • 00:41:39
    Raise your hand if you've ever cut someone off in traffic.
  • 00:41:43
    Why'd you do it?
  • 00:41:46
    You were late.
  • 00:41:47
    I'll tell you why I cut people off in traffic
  • 00:41:49
    because my kids are in the backseat doing exactly the things
  • 00:41:52
    that I've been talking to you about for the last 15 minutes
  • 00:41:54
    that Democrats and Republicans do to each other.
  • 00:41:56
    And I get distracted.
  • 00:41:57
  • 00:41:59
    We are wired to believe that our side acts out of love
  • 00:42:03
    and their side acts out of hate.
  • 00:42:05
  • 00:42:06
    Again, it's not about giving up your position on an issue.
  • 00:42:08
    It's just about what's motivating the other side.
  • 00:42:11
    We think we're motivated by love and they're motivated by hate.
  • 00:42:16
    But again, we get it wrong.
  • 00:42:18
    Research shows that people who try to guess the motives
  • 00:42:20
    of other groups are like hilariously wrong about the outcomes.
  • 00:42:24
  • 00:42:25
    They get it so wrong.
  • 00:42:28
    I think part of what props up that myth is that, I mean,
  • 00:42:30
    let's be honest, politicians, right?
  • 00:42:32
    We see the politicians on the other side
  • 00:42:34
    and they live out our worst fears about those folks.
  • 00:42:37
    But guys, forget about politicians for a second.
  • 00:42:39
    Think about your neighbors.
  • 00:42:40
    Think about the person sitting next to you right now.
  • 00:42:43
    What are their motivations?
  • 00:42:45
    Ask them. Right?
  • 00:42:48
    We are less divided than we think we are.
  • 00:42:50
    All right, so what does this all mean for us as Christians?
  • 00:42:53
    Well, the one thing I want to ask you to think about doing today,
  • 00:42:57
    the number one thing that we can do to fight this
  • 00:43:00
    is to go do something positive with someone who's not like you.
  • 00:43:05
    Go do something positive with someone who's not like you.
  • 00:43:08
    When we're faced with these teams, one of the things
  • 00:43:11
    that we need to do to keep us from going like this
  • 00:43:15
    is to build that sort of connective tissue, right?
  • 00:43:18
    I'm a Democrat. We call it a cross-cutting identity.
  • 00:43:20
    I'm a Democrat. You're a Republican.
  • 00:43:23
    But we both serve the homeless together.
  • 00:43:25
    We both care about the victims of domestic violence.
  • 00:43:28
    We both want to see racism ended.
  • 00:43:30
    We both care about families being healthy and whole.
  • 00:43:32
    We do these things together and that connects us.
  • 00:43:35
    This is not mushy.
  • 00:43:37
    Guys, this is what keeps societies together.
  • 00:43:40
    In countries around the world with strong cross-cutting identities,
  • 00:43:43
    civil wars are 12 times less likely, 12 times less likely.
  • 00:43:49
    So go work together because the solution to our divisions
  • 00:43:52
    is not to come to some sort of mushy middle,
  • 00:43:54
    to compromise our values and learn to tolerate each other.
  • 00:43:57
    It's to roll up our sleeves and get to work
  • 00:44:01
    on things that matter in our communities.
  • 00:44:04
    So go do something positive
  • 00:44:06
    and do it with someone who doesn't vote like you,
  • 00:44:08
    do it with someone who doesn't look like you,
  • 00:44:10
    do it with someone who doesn't worship like you.
  • 00:44:14
    You know, politics, politicians do a lot of talking.
  • 00:44:18
    Talk is cheap. Politicians talk a lot.
  • 00:44:20
    Angry people on the Internet talk a lot.
  • 00:44:23
    But there's this old saying from the civil rights movement that I love.
  • 00:44:26
    It says, "Don't tell me what you believe.
  • 00:44:30
    Show me what you do, then I'll know what you believe."
  • 00:44:34
    Right? [applause]
  • 00:44:39
    Everyone's talking about their values.
  • 00:44:41
    Let's live our values.
  • 00:44:43
    Matthew 25, Jesus says:
  • 00:44:59
    That's what we need to be doing.
  • 00:45:01
    That's what we need to be doing out in this world,
  • 00:45:03
    not talking about it, but doing it.
  • 00:45:05
    So we have a choice: We can be part of the problem as Christians
  • 00:45:11
    or we can be a beacon of light.
  • 00:45:13
    And the rest of the country can know what we believe by what we do.
  • 00:45:17
    Thank you so much. [applause]
  • 00:45:27
    - Andrew, very good.
  • 00:45:29
    Every time I hear you talk about this, I get more and more out of it.
  • 00:45:32
    The tribe thing, that's just a --
  • 00:45:35
    spell that out more again for the tribes
  • 00:45:37
    because I read a book a while ago on called Freakonomics.
  • 00:45:41
    A lot of people in here have.
  • 00:45:42
    It looked at the hidden reasons why things are.
  • 00:45:45
    One of the interesting things the guy arrived at was
  • 00:45:48
    when these gangs are fighting, the actual gang leaders,
  • 00:45:52
    they want peace because they're making money, they're doing fine.
  • 00:45:55
    But the violence gets started by the younger guys
  • 00:45:58
    who are trying to make their mark in the world.
  • 00:46:00
    And that's why there's a this and I just I get a sense,
  • 00:46:04
    like in our climate, we probably have most Republicans
  • 00:46:09
    and most Democrats who would really like peace,
  • 00:46:10
    but it seems like there's some vested interest to divide us.
  • 00:46:14
    - Yeah, polarization is a multibillion dollar industry, right?
  • 00:46:17
    If you want to sell a book,
  • 00:46:19
    if you want to raise money for your cause,
  • 00:46:21
    if you want to get elected,
  • 00:46:24
    if you if you want to be popular in social media.
  • 00:46:26
    nuance is not exciting.
  • 00:46:29
    They are evil.
  • 00:46:30
    That's what sells. That's what makes money.
  • 00:46:33
    And I think, again, it's not just that
  • 00:46:34
    that's landing on us in a vacuum.
  • 00:46:36
    It's landing on us with brains that are wired for it,
  • 00:46:40
    that go, "Yeah, I want that."
  • 00:46:41
    And so it's we're just feeding it.
  • 00:46:43
    But it's absolutely vested, very wealthy interests that are doing this.
  • 00:46:47
    - Yeah. Very few of us probably say something like, "They are evil."
  • 00:46:49
    We're more comfortable with, "They are idiots."
  • 00:46:53
    - Yeah.
  • 00:46:54
    - You know they -- that's just another form of that.
  • 00:46:59
    You even coming into a relationship with Jesus,
  • 00:47:02
    that was difficult for you because the whole tribe thing, right?
  • 00:47:05
    - Sure. Yeah. I mean I grew up in a community where if I said,
  • 00:47:08
    "Yeah, I've decided to become a Christian,"
  • 00:47:09
    people, at best my perception was,
  • 00:47:11
    that people would look at me like I was crazy.
  • 00:47:13
  • 00:47:14
    Part of what's interesting is that our perceptions are often wrong.
  • 00:47:17
    And my family has been so supportive and loving.
  • 00:47:21
    My friends have been so supportive, even if they don't agree with it.
  • 00:47:24
    But my perception was that I was taking this enormous risk.
  • 00:47:27
    That I was going out into the wilderness
  • 00:47:29
    and that all of the people I grew up who cared about me
  • 00:47:32
    were gonna leave me.
  • 00:47:33
    We're gonna say, "I don't want to make do with you.
  • 00:47:35
    You've been brainwashed."
  • 00:47:36
    So it's interesting also that we think other people
  • 00:47:39
    are gonna act more negatively toward us than they actually are.
  • 00:47:42
    - How close to a civil war do you think we are?
  • 00:47:45
    - You know, I don't think that we're close in terms of like time.
  • 00:47:48
    But what I think we are is on a really negative trend.
  • 00:47:50
    So what you want --
  • 00:47:52
    I mean, what you want to do is cut off bad trends
  • 00:47:54
    before they get too far. Right?
  • 00:47:56
    So I think it's alarmist to say,
  • 00:47:58
    "Oh, we're going to have a civil war tomorrow."
  • 00:47:59
    I think it's complacent to say, "Oh, we're fine.
  • 00:48:02
    Guys, everything's fine.
  • 00:48:03
    You know?
  • 00:48:04
    We're not shaking each other's hands in the Oval Office or whatever,
  • 00:48:07
    but otherwise everything's fine."
  • 00:48:08
    That's not true.
  • 00:48:10
    But I think the trend is what we're worried about.
  • 00:48:12
    - It's really crazy, you showed the immigration thing up there.
  • 00:48:16
    In the verse I was talking about earlier is
  • 00:48:18
    happy are those who make peace, or blessed are the peacemakers.
  • 00:48:22
    It just dawned on me like how crazy would it be
  • 00:48:26
    if a Democrat would say, "Oh, and by the way, I think that we should --
  • 00:48:32
    that immigrants should follow the laws of the land."
  • 00:48:35
    How crazy would it be for a Republican to say, "Oh, by the way,
  • 00:48:39
    I think we should have compassion for immigrants who are here."
  • 00:48:42
    - I mean, those are two simple basic things
  • 00:48:45
    that you tend to not hear in either side.
  • 00:48:49
    You just gave me a reason for it,
  • 00:48:50
    because we don't want to be deemed a traitor to our tribe?
  • 00:48:55
    - Yeah. Or we're afraid that if we disarm and they don't disarm,
  • 00:48:58
    then it'll just pull everything farther towards them.
  • 00:49:01
    I mean, Trevor Noah, the comedian, has this great skit
  • 00:49:04
    where he talks about, you know, when you get really angry at someone
  • 00:49:07
    and you're ready to just unload and then they apologize unexpectedly
  • 00:49:11
    and you're like, oh, right.
  • 00:49:13
    Like, I wasn't expecting that.
  • 00:49:15
    But you're still really angry, so you have to calm down a little bit.
  • 00:49:19
    People are so, I think, ready for that kind of message.
  • 00:49:23
    I was watching the debates with my wife and we were shocked
  • 00:49:26
    by how all these opportunities the candidates have.
  • 00:49:28
    These are people on the same team.
  • 00:49:29
  • 00:49:30
    And still they kept passing up chances
  • 00:49:32
    to say good things about each other
  • 00:49:34
    and instead would say sort of good things about each other,
  • 00:49:37
    which they then use to like, you know,
  • 00:49:38
    make a point that they were better.
  • 00:49:41
    I think we're just sick of it, honestly.
  • 00:49:42
    I mean, I think I think we want better from our leaders.
  • 00:49:45
    - Yeah, things are -- [applause]
  • 00:49:50
    Right. Yeah, the -- Well, I respect Joe Biden's years of service,
  • 00:49:57
    but he's so old, he really can't run it.
  • 00:49:58
    It's just -- It's all just a one up.
  • 00:50:04
    I think one of the things that I feel and I think
  • 00:50:09
    when I interact with people who are different than me
  • 00:50:11
    and have different views of me, and specifically,
  • 00:50:14
    the only difference that really matters to me is,
  • 00:50:17
    "Do you know Christ or do you not know Christ?"
  • 00:50:20
    Because that's what I'm really concerned about
  • 00:50:22
    with your heart and where you're going.
  • 00:50:26
    And I remind myself when I'm in those like, (sound effect)
  • 00:50:29
    that I'm I'm playing on a different level.
  • 00:50:31
    All of us should be playing on a different level.
  • 00:50:34
    Jesus has nothing to do with alcohol.
  • 00:50:39
    Meaning -- I'm sorry if you've got a opinion on that,
  • 00:50:40
    He's just not going to.
  • 00:50:41
    Jesus has nothing to do, He didn't speak in the tobacco.
  • 00:50:45
    He has nothing to do, he doesn't speak into firearms.
  • 00:50:48
    Get it? Alcohol, tobacco, firearms.
  • 00:50:50
    He has nothing to do with the tax code.
  • 00:50:53
    He has nothing to do with the Republican Party's politics
  • 00:50:56
    or the Democratic Party's politics.
  • 00:50:58
    What do I mean He has nothing to do with it?
  • 00:51:00
    What, I mean by that it's not central to His mission.
  • 00:51:04
    His mission is this: He dies on a Cross, all of my garbage,
  • 00:51:09
    all of my venom, all of my, you know,
  • 00:51:12
    spewing of calling people stupid or whatever
  • 00:51:16
    is transferred on His back and all of His goodness,
  • 00:51:19
    all of His righteousness is transferred to my back.
  • 00:51:22
    So actually, when God looks at me, my identity is I am loved,
  • 00:51:26
    I'm cherished is His son.
  • 00:51:27
    That's what a Christian is.
  • 00:51:29
    It's not how you vote. It's that.
  • 00:51:31
    That's really serious.
  • 00:51:32
    It's that simple.
  • 00:51:33
    And it is only that, only that.
  • 00:51:36
    And so what it means is when someone gets really upset
  • 00:51:39
    about my faith in Christ leads me to believe this, but not my identity
  • 00:51:44
    or leads me to say this, they all get freaked out.
  • 00:51:47
    But I have to remember, I have an identity that God has given me.
  • 00:51:51
    All they have as an identity is that political belief.
  • 00:51:55
    And so they can't really give up on that or talk about it at all
  • 00:51:58
    because their whole world would crumble.
  • 00:52:01
    That's what happens, friends, when your world is centered
  • 00:52:03
    on just ideas that are out there.
  • 00:52:06
    it crumbles.
  • 00:52:07
    - I think we need to be, as Christians,
  • 00:52:11
    we need to be starting with our faith and then working outward.
  • 00:52:13
    We might get to different viewpoints on different issues.
  • 00:52:17
  • 00:52:18
    But it starts with what does Jesus say?
  • 00:52:21
    And then it flows outward.
  • 00:52:22
    It doesn't start with what is on cable news?
  • 00:52:25
    And then I bring that to church with me.
  • 00:52:26
  • 00:52:27
    It's got to be flipped. We've got to flip that.
  • 00:52:29
    And I hear pastors all around the country tell us that.
  • 00:52:31
    I say, I've got our folks for one hour a week.
  • 00:52:34
    Cable news has them every night.
  • 00:52:36
    And we need to flip that.
  • 00:52:37
    - The problem is, we don't think that way.
  • 00:52:39
    We don't -- we're not we're not smart enough to say,
  • 00:52:40
    "Well, that's really what's informed me."
  • 00:52:42
    We're not. We're not. We just --
  • 00:52:44
    We have been formed by the ways of the world.
  • 00:52:48
    We're not being formed by the ways of Christ.
  • 00:52:50
    But no, we're we don't see it that way.
  • 00:52:51
    t's just that that's the new station that has truth.
  • 00:52:54
    Friends, we've got to be better.
  • 00:52:58
    We have to be better.
  • 00:52:59
    And those of us in this room,
  • 00:53:01
    whether you know Christ or not know Christ,
  • 00:53:03
    you've come into an environment where you're up for this kind of talk.
  • 00:53:06
    We have to be better.
  • 00:53:08
    Our country has to be better.
  • 00:53:09
    Where are the leaders who will give hope?
  • 00:53:12
    Where are the leaders that will give peace?
  • 00:53:15
    One last little graphic for us on hope
  • 00:53:18
    that shows kind of the polarization,
  • 00:53:19
    how the kingdom of God is different than the right and the left.
  • 00:53:23
    I think we have it up on the screen.
  • 00:53:25
    We can show it here right now.
  • 00:53:26
  • 00:53:27
    What is our reason for hope?
  • 00:53:28
    If you're conservatives on the right, it is:
  • 00:53:40
    If we're on the left, if we're liberal:
  • 00:53:50
    So right there, there is this built in tension, which, by the way,
  • 00:53:54
    who builds this tension for us?
  • 00:53:57
    Who creates this tension?
  • 00:53:59
    - Well, I mean, I think that there's real pain
  • 00:54:02
    and real problems in the world.
  • 00:54:03
    And I think that we develop ideologies around them.
  • 00:54:06
    I think what gets problematic is when we take those
  • 00:54:08
    and we divorced them from the core teachings of Jesus.
  • 00:54:11
    I mean, you can have an ideology,
  • 00:54:13
    but if your ideology leads you to a point where you say,
  • 00:54:15
    "I'm not going to help this person because
  • 00:54:18
    they're not in my political group," or whatever it is,
  • 00:54:20
    then you've lost touch with what you are supposed to be doing.
  • 00:54:23
    - Right. I would also say what would we feel if we knew
  • 00:54:28
    that there was a corporation that was spending
  • 00:54:30
    hundreds of millions of dollars to influence you,
  • 00:54:34
    a corporation that was looking for power
  • 00:54:36
    and was spending hundreds of millions of dollars for that?
  • 00:54:40
    You would say, "Really?"
  • 00:54:41
    Yeah, it's called Republican and Democrat parties.
  • 00:54:45
    They are corporations that have to have
  • 00:54:49
    hundreds of millions of dollars for their power.
  • 00:54:53
    And they live -- They live in this tension.
  • 00:54:56
    They want to exasperate this tension.
  • 00:55:00
  • 00:55:01
    - Yeah. I mean, it's their jobs to win.
  • 00:55:03
  • 00:55:04
    And sometimes they're not equal in terms of
  • 00:55:06
    how right they are about issues, but either way, their job is to win.
  • 00:55:09
    It's not to follow the core teachings of our faith.
  • 00:55:12
    It's not where they're at.
  • 00:55:13
    - Right. So the Kingdom, which is the purple, the radical middle,
  • 00:55:16
    it says this, or at least our hope is:
  • 00:55:30
    And then we can figure out what to do with the elements of truth
  • 00:55:33
    that might be in the red
  • 00:55:34
    or the elements of truth that might be in the blue.
  • 00:55:37
    Hey, let's thank Andrew for being with us today.
  • 00:55:40
    Good stuff, brother.
  • 00:55:42
    Good, good stuff. Thank you. [applause]
  • 00:55:46
    All right. I want to give us a couple more things
  • 00:55:49
    and then we're done. We're really, really done.
  • 00:55:52
    Is this series being helpful so far?
  • 00:55:54
    Is it being helpful? [applause]
  • 00:55:56
    I just tell ya, you know, our attendance has gone down
  • 00:56:00
    and may continue to go down.
  • 00:56:02
    And that's fine with me.
  • 00:56:05
    That's fine with me. [applause]
  • 00:56:08
    We will be a place where you'll be pushed intellectually,
  • 00:56:12
    you'll be pushed spiritually.
  • 00:56:14
    And if you only want your church to be an amen corner,
  • 00:56:16
    this is not the right church for you.
  • 00:56:19
    Not the right church for you. [applause]
  • 00:56:22
    I care about you too much to just have you sucked into the vortex
  • 00:56:25
    of what happens over there.
  • 00:56:26
    And specifically I care about my call before God too much
  • 00:56:30
    to be silent on basic no-brainer things that are in the scriptures
  • 00:56:35
    and every single hero of the faith has lived out, every one.
  • 00:56:38
    This is not controversial, weird thinking.
  • 00:56:41
    This goes to the core of who the church has always been when it's right.
  • 00:56:45
    Now, if this is intriguing for you hearing talk like this,
  • 00:56:49
    I can't do this all the time on stage.
  • 00:56:51
    Other people speak on stage.
  • 00:56:52
    I've got a lot more God's doing in me
  • 00:56:53
    that I'm trying to get out to help people.
  • 00:56:56
    And I think it's important, in fact,
  • 00:56:57
    I hope you have people you're trying to help.
  • 00:56:59
    I hope you have people who are following you.
  • 00:57:03
    The Bible tells us we should have that.
  • 00:57:04
    In the book of 1 Corinthians 11:1,
  • 00:57:07
    the apostle Paul says follow my example:
  • 00:57:10
    Imitate me as I follow Christ.
  • 00:57:13
    You want to know Christ? Imitate me.
  • 00:57:15
  • 00:57:16
    The Book of Philippians, he also says a similar way.
  • 00:57:19
    He says this:
  • 00:57:27
    Practices these, whatever I'm doing, practice these things.
  • 00:57:31
    Over and over and over again this happens
  • 00:57:32
    again and again and again and again.
  • 00:57:34
    I just want to say I would like to help you
  • 00:57:36
    if there is any way I can help you.
  • 00:57:37
    And one of the ways I want to is being stuff
  • 00:57:41
    that's being put out on social media.
  • 00:57:43
    If you want a diet of this kind of stuff
  • 00:57:45
    versus other stuff that's out there swirling around, you can do it.
  • 00:57:48
    You can follow me on Instagram @BrianTome.
  • 00:57:52
    Recently I do Q& A's every other week where people ask questions.
  • 00:57:54
    I've heard that it is very, very helpful for them to hear.
  • 00:57:57
    We'll put a couple of them up there on the screen,
  • 00:57:59
    the kind of stuff that's there where people go,
  • 00:58:01
    "Oh, I didn't know that I could ask that question.
  • 00:58:05
    I didn't know there was a place where I could get help.
  • 00:58:07
    There's questions that people ask that I can't put on screen
  • 00:58:12
    in a church service that are really good and they need to be answered.
  • 00:58:16
    And you can find that.
  • 00:58:17
    You can find out stuff about what I'm doing with family
  • 00:58:21
    or how I'm having fun or whatever.
  • 00:58:22
    It's just a way to connect i f you want a different voice,
  • 00:58:25
    that might help you get a little closer Christ
  • 00:58:27
    or just have some levity in the midst of your day.
  • 00:58:30
    So you can check that out.
  • 00:58:31
    And we're not going to be doing politics 24/7 here.
  • 00:58:36
    We're not. We're not gonna do that.
  • 00:58:38
    It's not going to happen over and over and over again.
  • 00:58:40
    It's going to be turned off after this series.
  • 00:58:44
    Then where you can pick it up or be helped from here on forward
  • 00:58:47
    if you want to is another channel we started
  • 00:58:50
    called The Radical Middle.
  • 00:58:51
    When you leave here today, you're going to get a bumper sticker
  • 00:58:54
    that you can put on or you can throw away if you want.
  • 00:58:56
    If you're going to throw it away,
  • 00:58:57
    don't take it because they cost a lot of money.
  • 00:59:00
    Don't Panic, The Radical Middle.
  • 00:59:02
    And there is a social channel we started called The Radical Middle
  • 00:59:05
    where we're trying to help and see we can have peace
  • 00:59:07
    no matter who the president is.
  • 00:59:08
    We can always put people over politics.
  • 00:59:10
    We can get to a new place.
  • 00:59:12
    And I want to ask you to go and follow us.
  • 00:59:14
    Follow us on The Radical Middle.
  • 00:59:16
    Follow me at @BrianTome if you want help,
  • 00:59:19
    if you want something that's a little bit different,
  • 00:59:21
    because I think God has something different for you
  • 00:59:25
    than what our culture is giving to you and I.
  • 00:59:28
    Let me pray for us right now.
  • 00:59:29
    God, thank You for the truth You've given us.
  • 00:59:31
    Thank you for voices like Andrew.
  • 00:59:32
    Thank you for a great country we live in
  • 00:59:34
    called the United States of America.
  • 00:59:37
    There's no other place I'd rather be
  • 00:59:40
    and there's no other time I'd want to be in then right now,
  • 00:59:43
    this critical time in our nation's history.
  • 00:59:45
    Help us to be the ones who give peace
  • 00:59:47
    and we have the blessing of happiness.
  • 00:59:50
  • 00:59:52
    Have a great week. We'll see you next weekend.

Process, journal or discuss the themes of this article - here's a few questions to get the ball rolling...

Welcome to the Weekend Follow Up.

  1. Polarization is all around us. Cat or dog? Chocolate or vanilla? Brian or Chuck? What is the difference between being informed and simply being formed?

  2. Jesus taught a lot about how to deal with others. Like, a lot. Read Matthew 5:1-12 for one of his heavy hitters. Which of these is the easiest for you to believe or identify with, and which is the hardest? And, of course, why?

  3. Read Matthew 25:35-36 & Matthew 25:40. Do you see Jesus in other people? Practically, how would your daily routine change if you believed each person had a little bit of Jesus in them?

  4. The Bible—a book that contains stories of 9-foot giants, 1,000 years old people, food that falls from the sky, and cities turned to ash. In the midst of the stories, this Jesus character tells us to be “the light of the world.” Read Mathew 5:13-16. What in the world is he talking about?

  5. Read 2 Chronicles 7:14 and then pray as a group before you leave. Specifically ask how each person in the group can seek God and be a light, no matter the circumstances.

0 people are discussing these questions

(This stuff helps us figure out how many fruitcakes to make come December)

You must include at least one person

Got it! Enjoy your discussion.

Feb 22, 2020 1 hr

Recent Series