Ugh.
This noise—somewhere between a sigh and a grunt—sums up my feelings on the first two to three months of the year. If October, November, and December collectively constitute a 90-day celebratory countdown to the end of the calendar year—complete with themed holidays to mark the end of each month—then January, February, and the first half of March are the hangover months. (The world getting pitch-black at 5 PM was cute and all when festive lights adorned houses and stores, but now it’s simply annoying that you can go an entire day without potentially seeing the sun.)
Holiday decorations have returned to their packing boxes, where they’ll stay for the next nine to ten months. The magical feeling of Christmas morning has faded, replaced instead by a stack of bills proving that “Black Friday savings” is a relative term. And depending on when you’re reading this, either precious few NFL games are remaining—none of which will include my Bengals—or the season has already ended, condemning us to six months where our Sunday afternoon and evening viewing hasn’t been blessedly predetermined by our friends at the National Football League.
I understand if this sounds a bit overly melancholic, but I don’t think I’m alone in feeling as though the winter months can be especially tough. According to the National Institute for Mental Health, it’s not uncommon for feelings of sadness or depression to spike in the winter. Dark, frigid days when the sun keeps bankers’ hours and stays mostly hidden behind grey clouds can tempt us to stay inside for days or weeks at a time, leaving only for work, groceries, and to get the mail—the latter of which is where the bills live. Add to this the specter of flu, COVID, RSV, stomach bugs, and all the other germs that flourish when we’re stuck in close quarters, and it’s easy to wonder why God couldn’t have designed a nine-month seasonal calendar that skipped the unpleasant parts.
Seriously…why didn’t He?
God Loves to Use Storms
Turns out, God tends to use the weather—crappy weather in particular—to get our attention. Among the Gospels—the eyewitness accounts of Jesus’ life—is a story of Jesus and his disciples (who were fishermen) boating across a lake. Shortly after the trip began, Jesus fell asleep, and later a severe storm hit, rocking the boat. The disciples, understandably concerned they were about to die, woke Jesus, who promptly told the wind and roaring seas to settle down. Jesus then asks the disciples, “Where is your faith?”
Now, I sympathize with the disciples here. I’ve seen the film, The Perfect Storm, enough to know what the sea can do to boats. I understand why they’d be panicking. And while I’ve never been in literal danger of drowning, I’ve spent more than a few times being overwhelmed by feelings of fear, isolation, and depression. These feelings aren’t exclusive to the winter months, but that’s when they can feel the sharpest, as creature comforts like holidays, spring bike rides, summer vacations, and weekends filled with football have been stripped away. And in those moments, it’s easy to ask, “God, where are you? Do you know what’s happening down here? Because it sucks right now.”
What the disciples either didn’t know or forgot—and what I forget myself—is that Jesus knows about and is prepared for the storms and winters we face. The Bible repeatedly shows that Jesus knew the future—and among other things, predicted his death and resurrection. So it wasn’t a surprise to Him when the boat ran into gale-force winds. In fact, Jesus was so prepared for the situation that he tried (and failed) to get a nap in.
Reading that story as a kid, my biggest takeaway was that Jesus had some kind of X-Men-like quality that allowed him to control the weather. As an adult, I notice that He let the boat sail into the storm in the first place. Why would He do that? Why not tip off the disciples and sail around the storm? Or at least spawn some life rafts so as not to cause concern if a storm hits? While Jesus doesn’t specify his motives here, sailing into the storm gave him an opportunity to show that everything, including the seas and winds, was under his control.
Arguably more importantly, He also showed the disciples that they were prone to lapses of faith. At this point in their journey together, they had already seen Jesus perform miracles, including turning water into wine, healing the sick, and raising the dead. Did they really think He was going to abandon them when they were in the middle of a storm?
They sure did, just like I do when I’m feeling cold, tired, and alone (especially in January through March). But as the story shows, Jesus is still present.
To be clear: Feeling depressed, overwhelmed, or anxious isn’t a sin—the Bible tells us this is exactly how Jesus felt in the moments leading to his death. The question is, what do we do when we find ourselves there? Do we hunker down in isolation and wait for spring, or is there a better option?
In my experience with the winter months, there are a few helpful tips I’ve found to help me experience God, dare I say, as closely as I do the rest of the year, and not just be counting the days until March Madness hits:
4 Ways to Find Life in the Winter Months
1. Talk to God
Yes, it can feel easier said than done a lot of the time. But in moments where life feels overwhelming, or I simply feel “off,” I let God know. I’m totally honest with Him.
For those of us who grew up in church, there may be a misconception that when we pray, we’re supposed to pretend that everything is just fine. But that’s not what Scripture tells us to do. The Book of Psalms alone was 50% lament. Not only is God okay with us turning to him when we feel down—he wants us to.
And if you’re not sure why you feel low, if you can’t put your finger on anything tangible, start there and just start yapping. The Book of Romans tells us that when Christians pray, God provides the Holy Spirit to help translate. We don’t have to get the words perfect—the Holy Spirit intercedes for us, putting words to thoughts and feelings we can’t otherwise describe.
2. Talk to People
Depending on your season of life, this is easier said than done. I’m a married father of two with a full-time job, and most of my friends meet that same description. Collectively, that means we don’t have much free time to hang out; in fact, it’s been years since I’ve seen some of my best friends who live out of state.
To remedy this, I’ve tried to get more proactive with texting and calls (bonus points if the call is while I’m already on a commute). The text topics have ranged from serious (sharing moments when I feel overwhelmed with life and just need others to know) to culinary (which spices truly belong in winter ale?) to captivating (how did Indiana win the national championship?!).
Whether the conversations are surface-level or in-depth, they’re a reminder to me that I’m not alone, that I have friends I can lean on during the dark times (Proverbs 27:9).
3. Don’t be Afraid to Seek Help
If you find yourself in a season—winter or other—when you feel depression or anxiety spiking beyond control, and you suspect you need to do more than meet with a friend, consider speaking with a professional. Check out the bottom of this article for more resources.
Unfortunately, there’s long been a stigma about seeking medical help for our behavioral and mental health. But as we’ve seen a spike in mental health disorders over the last several years, we know it’s nothing to suppress. Put another way: You wouldn’t avoid seeing the doctor if you thought you were having a heart attack— so don’t avoid speaking with a physician or therapist if you think it will benefit your mental health.
4. Get Moving
The natural inclination when it’s cold and dark outside is to stay inside doing as little as possible. Speaking from experience: don’t do that. Anything you can do to keep active—making a trip to the gym, streaming exercise tutorials in your living room, or just going on a quick walk—will trigger your endorphins, one of the body’s natural “feel good” chemicals. Making a habit of this throughout January, February, and March can make the dark, dreary months feel less isolating.
There are even ways to make the cold weather work for you and your fitness. Some of my best times as a runner have been in the winter, when the cold weather counteracts my rising body temperature. Just be sure to layer up and watch out for black ice… so I’ve been told (definitely didn’t encounter any myself and wind up in the hospital).
All this said, if winter is the season in which you flourish, then great! Enjoy whatever there is to enjoy between now and when the outside world springs back to life, and we no longer have to factor in wind chills when we dress for the day. But for everyone else, do what you need to do to stay spiritually, mentally, and physically warm—whether that’s talking to God or a friend, taking a spin class, or just throwing on an extra layer of fleece.
Be intentional about checking in on yourself and others. And remember: No matter how it feels, it won’t feel like this forever. (That is, until next January.) But even then, I believe we can all find a bit more of God and life in the storm.
- Want to speak with a counselor? Here is a list of counselors qualified to speak with you.
- You can also connect with Crossroads Community Care for a Talk Appointment to walk through any of your concerns.
- Reach out on the live chat at crossroads.net or e-mail Hello@crossroads.net. Wherever you live, whatever you’re looking for, they can recommend resources to build into you.
Disclaimer: This article is 100% human-generated.
Reflections to share? Got an idea for an article? Email us at articles@crossroads.net
At Crossroads, we major on the majors and minor on the minors. We welcome a diverse community of people who all agree that Jesus is Lord and Savior, even if they view minor theological and faith topics in different ways based on their unique experiences. Our various authors embody that principle, and we approach you, our reader, in the same fashion. You don’t have to agree with every detail of any article you see here to be part of this community or pursue faith. Chances are even our whole staff doesn’t even agree with every detail of what you just read. We are okay with that tension. And we think God is okay with that, too. The foundation of everything we do is a conviction that the Bible is true and that accepting Jesus is who he said he is leads to a healthy life of purpose and adventure—and eternal life with God.
