It’s a new year, and everyone is deciding what to do for their resolution. Well, at least I am. But before I talk about 2019’s New Year’s resolutions, let’s see what happened last year.
For 2018, I came up with some very common (and what I thought were very doable) New Year’s resolutions. My first was to lose weight and get healthy. I combined them into one since if I am getting healthy, I should lose weight, right? I didn’t come up with it because I thought I was fat. My doctor told me my cholesterol was high and my weight put me in the obese range. Nothing says “Happy New Year!” like being told you are obese. OK, resolution one is to drop my cholesterol and weight. Got it.
My second was to run a full marathon for the first time ever, which totally made sense because if I was going to get healthy and lose weight, exercise has to be part of it. So why not run a marathon? Plus, I was turning 40, and I thought it was a great way to mark the moment of turning 40. Watch out 2018! I’m going to be a lean, mean, fighting machine.
So how did it go? I lost 12 pounds. Woohoo! Yay, me! I started fitting into clothes that were hidden in the back of my closet, you know the ones I’m talking about. The clothes that you refuse to get rid of because one day you might fit into them again. I was fitting into some of them, and I was feeling pretty good about myself. Well, until Thanksgiving. Somehow I had managed to gain all of the weight that I lost back. Skinny clothes are back in the closet. Fat girl clothes have come back out.
My second goal was to run a full marathon. I started training with a good friend of mine because no one should train for a marathon alone. For a while, I was doing great. I was following the program, running three short runs during the week and a long run on Saturday. Then came the first Saturday where we had to run a half marathon, and I did it. Holy moly! I couldn’t believe myself. It was amazing. It was also the most painful thing I have ever done, and that’s including birthing three babies. My neck, back, hips, and knees took weeks to recover. I physically couldn’t run anymore. My body decided running wasn’t something it liked to do. So, I stopped training and left my poor friend to fend for herself.
By all accounts, this past year was a complete failure. Did I lose weight? Yes, and then I gained it all back. Did I get healthy? No, not really. Did I run a marathon? Nope, not even close. Then I remembered something I wrote last year. Exactly a year ago, I wrote:
I dub 2018 the year of JOY! The year I get healthy. The year I run a marathon. The year I turn 40. It’s going to be an amazing year.
When I wrote that, I was putting all my joy and amazingness into appearances and things. My year of joy was solely based on me losing weight and running a marathon. But God reminded me that joy is not based on how I look or the things I have accomplished. It is based on who I am in Him. I could take a look back at the past year and let my failures define me. Or I can realize that those failures are not what defines me. What does define me is my relationship with God, and that brings me joy.
For 2019, I will once again try to get healthy because I believe God wants that for me. But I will also look into what God is calling me to do. My primary resolution for 2019 is to trust God. If that’s all I accomplish next year, I’ll consider it a wild success. He’s the only source of joy. He’s the only focus in my life that’s worth it. Health or any other priority ultimately fails to satisfy without Him. It’s easier said than done, but I know when I follow God amazing things happen.
Here’s to 2019.