How to Suffer Better | Turn Your Suffering Into Strength

00:00:04

- Well, good morning everyone.

00:00:06

It's so good to be with you. My name is Kyle.

00:00:09

I'm our Lead Pastor here at Crossroads.

00:00:12

Welcome to the Run Journey.

00:00:14

You know, one thing is always true

00:00:16

about every single weekend at Crossroads,

00:00:20

which is there are people all over the place,

00:00:22

in this room and online.

00:00:24

Some people walk in angry.

00:00:27

Some people walk in joyful.

00:00:30

Some people walk in disillusioned.

00:00:33

Some people walk in full of hope.

00:00:36

And I know that this weekend is no different.

00:00:38

If you're part of the Crossroads family,

00:00:40

you received an email concerning a situation

00:00:42

involving our Senior Pastor Brian Tome.

00:00:44

We will be addressing that later on in the service,

00:00:47

but it's not where we're going to start.

00:00:49

Where we're going to start is to take our hearts,

00:00:52

whether the label they wear is anger or joy,

00:00:57

hope or bitterness, whatever it is,

00:01:00

and give that heart to God together right now.

00:01:04

Would you stand on your feet? Let's worship.

00:01:13

- Let's sing together. Call his name.

00:08:38

Father God, I think every step you saw

00:08:43

that came into this place or online with us,

00:08:46

into this space together is a step towards You

00:08:49

because we believe, and I know when I get closer to You,

00:08:56

I get closer to life.

00:08:59

Thank You for taking us to deeper places.

00:09:02

Thank You for for making it clear

00:09:05

what Your way is and who You are.

00:09:07

You are kind and gracious and good and I fully trust You.

00:09:12

Set my eyes and my heart back on You this morning.

00:09:16

Thank You, God. Amen. - Yeah.

00:09:20

- It's great to be back together.

00:09:23

It's always great to sing together.

00:09:25

I love that you're online with us, too.

00:09:27

Why don't you turn to somebody in the room

00:09:28

and just say, "Hey, glad to be here with you,"

00:09:31

and you can have a seat together.

00:09:48

- Man, it's so good to get to worship with you.

00:09:50

Isn't it amazing to have a God who will accept

00:09:53

whatever heart we bring to Him? It's incredible.

00:09:57

And by the way, if you're brand new, I hope today

00:09:59

you hear about a God you wish was true.

00:10:01

You heard some about that and those lyrics,

00:10:03

the songs we just sang.

00:10:04

You'll hear more about that in a minute.

00:10:06

But right now, if you're at the top of service,

00:10:08

you heard me mention that we will address the situation

00:10:12

that you might have received an email about this week.

00:10:14

We're going to do that right now with the message

00:10:17

from our co-founder and board chairman, Brian Wells.

00:10:23

- Hello. Crossroads family.

00:10:25

Earlier this week, you received an email

00:10:28

about a decision that our board made a few days ago,

00:10:31

and I wanted to provide you

00:10:33

a little bit more context for that.

00:10:36

I also wanted to apologize if I'm glancing

00:10:39

down at my notes here.

00:10:40

I just want to make sure that I don't forget anything.

00:10:44

In 2024, a gentleman who's a member of our community

00:10:49

shared an allegation with a Crossroads staff member

00:10:52

regarding Brian Tome and an incident

00:10:55

that had occurred almost ten years prior.

00:10:59

At that time, Brian kept a riding crop in his office

00:11:02

that had been a gift.

00:11:05

In November of 2015,

00:11:07

the gentleman entered Brian's office,

00:11:10

saw the riding crop and asked, "What is that?"

00:11:15

The allegation is that Brian picked up the riding crop,

00:11:19

said, "Oh yeah, you like that?"

00:11:22

And then whipped him in the crotch

00:11:24

and then rubbed the man's crotch with the riding crop.

00:11:30

When the staff member informed Brian of the allegation,

00:11:32

Brian immediately and very appropriately

00:11:35

directed the staff member to contact our board

00:11:37

with the clear direction that we should look into it

00:11:40

and he should recuse himself from the investigation.

00:11:46

A member of our board did so,

00:11:48

culminating with a joint meeting between

00:11:51

the man, the board member, and Brian.

00:11:57

After the meeting, the gentleman communicated

00:11:59

that the meeting went very well.

00:12:02

And then in a separate meeting,

00:12:04

the board officially admonished Brian

00:12:06

to be mindful of the weight of his words

00:12:08

and his actions and the need to be above reproach.

00:12:13

We then considered the issue resolved.

00:12:18

Earlier this week the same gentleman

00:12:21

recently contacted us again about the same allegations,

00:12:26

and sharing frustration with what he feels

00:12:29

is a lack of objectivity in the process.

00:12:33

Although no new information has been provided

00:12:35

at this point, after careful review, discussion,

00:12:40

debate and a lot of prayer, we decided that

00:12:45

the best thing to do for this member, for Brian,

00:12:49

and for all of us as a church family,

00:12:51

is to commission an independent investigation

00:12:54

to review the situation and interview

00:12:56

all the involved parties.

00:13:00

I would note that

00:13:01

an investigation does not indicate guilt.

00:13:04

It's simply an organized search for the truth.

00:13:09

Based on Crossroads' protocol, in a situation

00:13:12

that reaches this stage, the staff member.

00:13:15

In this case, Brian, is suspended

00:13:17

from all church responsibilities

00:13:19

until the investigation is concluded.

00:13:23

Our prayer is that it can be done quickly,

00:13:26

but our commitment is that it will be done right.

00:13:31

We'll provide updates for you as we're able.

00:13:36

And now I'd like Brian -- you to hear from Brian

00:13:39

a little bit of what he shared

00:13:41

with some of our senior staff.

00:13:44

- Yeah. The board is driving this,

00:13:46

this entire process.

00:13:48

There's things that I don't know

00:13:50

and I find out about which is the way it should be.

00:13:53

They're doing what great boards do.

00:13:55

They're driving this process

00:13:57

and doing what is best for the church,

00:13:59

which is their thing, and therefore I applaud this.

00:14:02

I'm for it. It's not -- it's not fun.

00:14:05

It's not comfortable, not something I want to do.

00:14:09

But I'm in and I'm going along with it.

00:14:11

And Beam asked me to just share a little bit

00:14:15

tonight from my perspective.

00:14:16

And just so you know, how I'm doing, I'm doing fine.

00:14:20

And so this is, uh, this is just heart wrenching.

00:14:22

It's tough. It's -- Yeah, it's not good.

00:14:25

And I'm thankful, thankful that

00:14:28

the independent investigation is going to happen.

00:14:31

I'm cooperating with it, I welcome it.

00:14:35

And, um, you know, we say at staff every day,

00:14:40

it's a great day to die.

00:14:41

Hey, it's a great day to lay down your pride.

00:14:43

It's a great day to lay down your reputations.

00:14:46

Great day to lay down all this stuff.

00:14:47

The most important thing is we get to truth,

00:14:51

and we honor Jesus and the church in the midst of it.

00:14:54

So I'm heartened by the steps that are being taken.

00:14:57

And, um, wish we didn't have to go through it,

00:15:00

but I think, I think the right things are happening

00:15:03

under the direction of the board.

00:15:05

And that's me.

00:15:09

- And one more note.

00:15:11

I've never been through anything exactly like this.

00:15:16

I can only imagine the stress

00:15:19

and the pain for everyone involved.

00:15:24

I have, however, been sitting where you are,

00:15:28

being able to -- being asked to trust someone

00:15:32

in authority when I can't have all the information.

00:15:36

It's hard.

00:15:39

It can lead to assumptions, to frustration

00:15:46

and to my own pain.

00:15:49

And I'm sorry for that.

00:15:53

I would just ask us all to extend grace all around

00:15:58

for everyone while we go through this process.

00:16:02

And if we have any credibility

00:16:06

based on our time together,

00:16:08

for some of us over 30 years,

00:16:12

I just ask you to lean into that right now.

00:16:20

We love Brian, we love this member, and we love you.

00:16:32

Please join us in praying for a quick reconciliation,

00:16:36

truth and unity. God bless you.

00:16:45

- We're going to do that right now.

00:16:47

Let's pray together.

00:16:49

God, we ask for Your presence and Your protection.

00:16:53

Jesus, You say You are the light of the world,

00:16:55

and right now we're inviting Your light.

00:16:57

Would You shine Your light brightly through our church?

00:17:00

Would You bring the truth to light?

00:17:02

And would You bring healing to everyone involved?

00:17:06

Lord, thank You. Thank You for being so good. Amen. Amen.

00:17:11

Well, there's a verse I've been returning to

00:17:14

a number of times this week. It's Acts 20:24, and it says:

00:17:20

But I do not account my life of any value

00:17:25

nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish my course

00:17:30

and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus,

00:17:33

to testify to the gospel of the grace of God.

00:17:40

That verse talks about the course of life.

00:17:43

Finish my course.

00:17:45

In this Run Journey we're talking about

00:17:47

the idea of a race,

00:17:48

that God has a race laid out for each of us.

00:17:50

There's a course to follow.

00:17:51

And I'll just tell you in my life,

00:17:53

the most frustrating part about having a race,

00:17:55

having a course, is that I don't know

00:17:57

what's around the next corner.

00:17:59

I don't know what pain might come my way.

00:18:00

I don't know what difficulty might come my way.

00:18:02

I don't know what hardship might come my way.

00:18:04

I just don't know.

00:18:06

Maybe in your life you've had those moments

00:18:08

where something just jumps out and you're like,

00:18:10

"Oh my gosh, I didn't see that coming."

00:18:13

The pain hits you, the suffering hits you

00:18:16

is the word that the Bible uses for it.

00:18:19

Well, I'm taking great comfort in the fact that,

00:18:22

while God has been grieved about things

00:18:25

that have happened in my life and your life,

00:18:27

He's never been caught off guard.

00:18:30

While God's been upset about things that have happened

00:18:33

to you and I, God's never been thrown for a loop.

00:18:37

While God's been saddened about the things

00:18:38

that we've experienced in our lives,

00:18:40

God's never been unprepared to comfort us

00:18:43

and to lead us forward.

00:18:46

This week we're talking about suffering in our race.

00:18:50

All of the pain, all the difficulties that come our way,

00:18:53

all the things that we didn't see coming,

00:18:54

all the things we never would have asked for

00:18:56

that come our way, and what do we do about them?

00:18:58

It's suffering.

00:18:59

We're speaking of, by the way, I suffered

00:19:01

in my group this past week with that game we played.

00:19:05

We did not make it to the end of the game board.

00:19:10

We worked for three hours.

00:19:12

We couldn't solve the riddles.

00:19:14

I've never felt so dumb in my life.

00:19:17

I don't know how your group went. That's all mine went.

00:19:19

We're talking about Paul.

00:19:20

We're talking about suffering today.

00:19:22

And we're going to go to the place where

00:19:24

the Apostle Paul suffered maybe the most,

00:19:26

a place called Philippi.

00:19:27

And when you study the life of the Apostle Paul,

00:19:29

this thing jumps out to you about

00:19:31

what makes him so different,

00:19:33

and it's how he handled suffering.

00:19:35

It all came his way, but he didn't do it in the usual way.

00:19:38

See, his suffering didn't lead him to bitterness.

00:19:41

His suffering didn't lead him to disillusionment.

00:19:43

Instead, his suffering led him to trust God more.

00:19:48

And it led to something called endurance,

00:19:50

character and hope.

00:19:52

This is the go/no go part that all of us must face

00:19:55

at the beginning of our race.

00:19:56

Today, like I said, we're going to go to Philippi,

00:19:58

a virtual pilgrimage, for 20 minutes

00:20:00

and then have live teaching after that.

00:20:02

Welcome to week two of the Run Journey.

00:20:11

- Hey, and welcome back to week two

00:20:13

of our Real Encounters Journey.

00:20:15

Again, we're here in Turkey and Greece,

00:20:18

and I am just so excited about week two,

00:20:20

because this is the week that we don't all want to talk about.

00:20:23

But this is what separates the true, true people

00:20:26

that are going to stick with it from the people that

00:20:28

are just going to maybe walk away in every circle. Right?

00:20:31

And that is suffering.

00:20:33

So I know we don't love to talk about it,

00:20:36

but there's just a little bit of hardship

00:20:38

that's just kind of crucial and necessary.

00:20:40

And it's a part of every great hero that we look up to.

00:20:44

And it's certainly a part of Paul's story.

00:20:46

And so, Bob, I know that Philippi in particular

00:20:50

is this space that we're headed to that has

00:20:52

such historical and archeological significance

00:20:56

for a place where Paul was beaten and thrown in jail,

00:20:59

but somehow found joy.

00:21:00

Just tell us a little bit about that space.

00:21:02

- Yeah, Philippi is an amazing site.

00:21:04

It's one of my favorites, you know, because

00:21:06

in Tarsus you have this modern city

00:21:08

built over the ancient site so you don't really see too much.

00:21:12

But when we go to Philippi, it's not inhabited.

00:21:15

And so the archeologists have been able to excavate

00:21:18

pretty much the whole city.

00:21:20

And it's a Roman colony that was the leading city in its region.

00:21:24

And when Paul and his disciples came there,

00:21:28

we kind of see the city that they entered into.

00:21:30

And there's several interesting discoveries there

00:21:33

that really tie directly to what Paul

00:21:36

and his disciples were doing.

00:21:38

Number one, we'll be visiting the baptism site of Lydia,

00:21:42

who was really the first convert in Europe.

00:21:44

- Wow.

00:21:45

- But even more so, her home, her household,

00:21:48

her family became the first church in Europe.

00:21:53

And so we can say that Lydia, as a woman,

00:21:55

was one of the first church leaders in Europe,

00:21:59

which is amazing.

00:22:00

- We do love to see girl power. We do, we love it.

00:22:03

- And that's the way of Jesus.

00:22:05

Jesus was all about empowering women, you know,

00:22:07

and we see that lived out in the ministry of Paul as well.

00:22:10

And we have other things too,

00:22:12

like on this subject of suffering

00:22:13

it's so vivid because the judgment platform,

00:22:17

the bema that's right on the main square, if you will,

00:22:21

of Philippi is still there,

00:22:23

and we can see the remains of it

00:22:24

and literally stand where Paul and Silas stood

00:22:28

when they were unjustly condemned and beaten

00:22:31

and then thrown into prison.

00:22:32

And it really brings home the reality of that story.

00:22:36

- That's so, so cool.

00:22:38

And to that point of Paul and Silas, you know, suffering.

00:22:42

And I'd love for you to chime in here,

00:22:44

because I think that word in your context

00:22:46

might be hitting home or even feel a little bit different

00:22:49

because you are a Christian in a space

00:22:52

that's just predominantly not a thing.

00:22:54

And so there's some level of suffering

00:22:56

that you might be experiencing as a follower of Jesus.

00:22:59

If you want to talk a little bit about that.

00:23:01

- Here, for example, in Turkey, we Turkish Christians

00:23:04

are usually, when we become believers,

00:23:07

we are outcasted by our families, by our friends,

00:23:10

by our surroundings. Right?

00:23:12

I myself personally was kicked out of my house

00:23:15

by my father when I made the decision

00:23:17

to become a Christian.

00:23:19

And so we really can relate to also the suffering

00:23:25

that the early church had to endure.

00:23:27

And it is kind of like an interesting point maybe too

00:23:32

to mention that also it is happening again

00:23:36

in kind of the same biblical land. Right?

00:23:39

And so when some of the young people in our country,

00:23:44

when they decide to follow Jesus,

00:23:47

they might have this wrong idea of like,

00:23:49

"Oh, now my life is going to be perfect.

00:23:51

You know, I'm going to have everything my way."

00:23:54

But no, as you know, as Christians, we know that

00:23:58

that's not what Jesus said that we would have.

00:24:01

Actually He said, "Take up your cross and follow Me."

00:24:05

Right? And we try to prepare them

00:24:07

for the suffering to come, because as Christians,

00:24:10

we're not called to a life free of pain,

00:24:14

free of suffering.

00:24:15

I mean, our Lord and Savior Jesus suffered the most,

00:24:19

you know, of the suffering. So, yeah.

00:24:22

- That is -- that's a good word right there,

00:24:24

that we are -- our calls to take up our cross.

00:24:27

And you know what? The best place to kind of go

00:24:29

and see a guy who did this, who took up his cross

00:24:32

and followed Jesus, is again to follow the life of Paul.

00:24:35

And so our next stop on the Journey is to see

00:24:38

where he suffered well, which is in Philippi.

00:24:43

- While in Asia minor, now modern day Turkey,

00:24:46

Paul experienced a vision of a man pleading,

00:24:49

"Come over to Macedonia and help us."

00:24:52

So Paul, Silas, Timothy and Luke,

00:24:54

who wrote the book of Acts, traveled to Philippi,

00:24:57

a city in Macedonia which is now modern day Greece.

00:25:00

It is here, on Paul's second missionary journey,

00:25:03

that the dramatic events recorded in Acts 16 unfold.

00:25:07

Lydia is baptized.

00:25:09

Paul cast a demon out of a slave girl

00:25:11

and is arrested, beaten and thrown into jail with Silas,

00:25:14

where they worship God until He sends an earthquake

00:25:17

to open the prison doors

00:25:18

and the jailer becomes a believer in Jesus.

00:25:21

Later, Paul wrote the New Testament book of Philippians

00:25:24

to the church that was founded during his time here.

00:25:27

- Welcome to Philippi.

00:25:29

Now, Philippi might not mean much to you and I,

00:25:31

but the events that have happened here

00:25:33

not only shaped the world,

00:25:35

but shaped the very life of Jesus Himself.

00:25:38

In the year 43 BC, there was a battle that took place

00:25:41

right here called the Battle of Philippi

00:25:43

between Octavian and Brutus.

00:25:46

Brutus had just brutally murdered

00:25:47

Octavian's adopted stepfather, Julius Caesar.

00:25:50

The battle was for control of the entire Roman Empire.

00:25:54

Octavian was victorious and went on to become

00:25:57

the first absolute ruler of the Roman Empire.

00:26:01

Later on, he changed his name to one you might recognize,

00:26:05

Caesar Augustus.

00:26:07

And the year 4 BC, Caesar Augustus decided that

00:26:10

he would like to count the number of citizens

00:26:12

across the entire Roman Empire, and so ordered a census

00:26:17

which caused a young Jewish couple named Mary and Joseph

00:26:20

to make the long journey to Bethlehem.

00:26:24

Jesus was born in Bethlehem,

00:26:26

which fulfilled a 700 year old prophecy

00:26:29

because of what happened right here.

00:26:32

The history of this place is incredible.

00:26:34

- Seven years have passed since Paul left Tarsus,

00:26:37

and those seven years have been incredible,

00:26:41

results everywhere, everything's going great in Paul's race.

00:26:44

Which is not to say there's not resistance.

00:26:47

Why is it going so great?

00:26:48

It's because Paul knows the secret to running

00:26:51

and winning the race, the one that he tells us about

00:26:54

in Romans chapter five.

00:26:55

We rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.

00:26:58

Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings,

00:27:01

knowing that suffering produces endurance,

00:27:03

and endurance produces character,

00:27:05

and character produces hope,

00:27:06

and hope does not put us to shame.

00:27:09

Paul knows this pattern that builds character

00:27:12

and hopeful power in somebody, and he knows that

00:27:15

it starts in suffering, which is why we're in this city

00:27:18

where we are today.

00:27:20

Now, when Paul walks into town,

00:27:21

he actually has an immediate win.

00:27:23

He meets some women who are praying.

00:27:25

And there's one in particular, a woman named Lydia,

00:27:27

a leader, a businesswoman

00:27:29

who responds incredibly to his message.

00:27:32

And actually, this is the story where,

00:27:33

if you've ever heard this idea that Paul is anti-women,

00:27:36

you have to engage with the story of Lydia.

00:27:39

We're actually going to talk about it more

00:27:40

in our group materials.

00:27:42

But for now, I want to focus on the second major story

00:27:45

that happens in Philippi.

00:27:46

In this story has these two details that just bother me

00:27:51

as I've studied it and as I've meditated on it.

00:27:53

Two things that just at face value

00:27:56

don't make any sense at all.

00:27:59

Now the story starts with Paul and his companions

00:28:02

experiencing something very familiar,

00:28:04

which is resistance, and then ultimately suffering.

00:28:08

As they're going back to the place of prayer

00:28:11

where they met Lydia, a slave girl comes out

00:28:14

and starts heckling them.

00:28:16

Here's how the story goes in Acts 16.

00:28:19

As we were going to the place of prayer,

00:28:21

we were met by a slave girl who had a spirit of divination

00:28:24

and brought her owners much gain by fortune telling.

00:28:28

She followed Paul and us, crying out,

00:28:30

"These men are servants of the Most High God,

00:28:33

who proclaim to you the way of salvation."

00:28:36

And this she kept doing for many days.

00:28:39

Paul, having become greatly annoyed,

00:28:42

turned and said to the spirit,

00:28:44

"I command you in the name of Jesus Christ

00:28:46

to come out of her."

00:28:48

And it came out that very hour.

00:28:50

Now the demon possessed girl shares the truth.

00:28:54

She says exactly what's true:

00:28:56

These men serve the Most High God,

00:28:58

and they're going to tell you about the way to be saved.

00:29:01

But for whatever reason, Paul doesn't want

00:29:03

this announced right now, in this moment.

00:29:06

And so, day 1, he ignores her.

00:29:08

Day 2 he tries again to ignore her,

00:29:10

but it bothers him a little bit more.

00:29:11

Day 3, day 4, we don't know exactly how many,

00:29:13

but eventually Paul gets so annoyed

00:29:17

He does what you and I do and he just snaps.

00:29:19

You can imagine him looking over his shoulder

00:29:21

and going, "Just get out."

00:29:23

And he kind of keeps going because the demon leaves.

00:29:26

In Paul's mind, problem solved. She's quiet.

00:29:30

However, her owners, who made a lot of money

00:29:35

off of her being demon possessed

00:29:36

and able to tell fortunes, are not very happy with Paul.

00:29:41

This is how the scene goes next.

00:29:43

But when her owners saw that their hope of gain was gone,

00:29:46

they seized Paul and Silas and dragged them

00:29:49

into the marketplace before the rulers.

00:29:51

And when they had brought them to the magistrates,

00:29:53

they said, "These men are Jews,

00:29:55

and they are disturbing our city.

00:29:57

They advocate customs that are not lawful

00:29:59

for us as Romans to accept or practice."

00:30:02

The crowd joined in attacking them,

00:30:04

and the magistrates tore the garments off them

00:30:07

and gave orders to beat them with rods.

00:30:10

And when they had inflicted many blows upon them,

00:30:13

they threw them into prison,

00:30:14

ordering the jailers to keep them safely.

00:30:17

Paul was dragged from that road we were just on

00:30:20

to this spot right here to go on trial,

00:30:24

and trial is very generous.

00:30:26

It worked differently back in the ancient world,

00:30:28

the justice system, if you could call it that,

00:30:30

especially in the Roman Empire.

00:30:32

See, this is the public marketplace where

00:30:34

we're standing.

00:30:35

In the public marketplace there was a raised platform

00:30:38

called the Bema, where two magistrates sat.

00:30:42

They were something like the co-mayors of the city,

00:30:44

only if, as mayor, you could do whatever you want,

00:30:47

to basically whoever you wanted.

00:30:49

And so Paul and Silas are dragged here

00:30:52

to the middle of the bema.

00:30:54

These holes in the ground are where

00:30:56

there would have been a railing.

00:30:57

And centered perfectly on the bema

00:30:59

is about where this circle is right now.

00:31:02

And so Paul is shoved up to the front of the railing.

00:31:04

He's holding on.

00:31:06

And the magistrates instantaneously condemn him.

00:31:09

No trial, no witnesses, no testimony, nothing.

00:31:14

They call out these guys who start beating them with rods.

00:31:17

And these aren't just random guys.

00:31:19

This is an actual position in Rome.

00:31:22

It's called a lictor.

00:31:23

The lictor is where the Roman soldiers retired now,

00:31:27

some of the biggest and the strongest.

00:31:28

They carried on their back a battle ax

00:31:31

and the handle of the battle ax was surrounded

00:31:33

by willow rods.

00:31:34

The idea was that you could quickly and easily

00:31:36

reach over your shoulder, get out a rod

00:31:39

and start whipping somebody with it.

00:31:41

The rod was called a fascia,

00:31:43

and it's actually where we get the word fascism from,

00:31:46

basically to brutally enforce

00:31:48

with whatever violent means necessary.

00:31:50

And so what happens to Paul right here in this circle

00:31:54

is he suffers greatly.

00:31:58

It's not a couple of whacks on the back.

00:31:59

As he's holding on to the iron bars

00:32:02

his back is ripped apart, blood is spilling everywhere.

00:32:06

Now, this moment is one of the details that bothers me.

00:32:10

Yes, the violent part. Yes, that bothers me.

00:32:12

But more so that the violence, the suffering

00:32:15

didn't have to happen.

00:32:17

Paul was a Roman citizen.

00:32:19

This exchange was not legal for Roman citizens.

00:32:22

You could do it to whoever else you want,

00:32:24

but Rome took their citizenship very, very seriously.

00:32:28

All Paul had to do before the first rod came across his back

00:32:32

and say, "Hey, by the way, I'm a citizen of Rome,"

00:32:36

and none of it would have happened.

00:32:40

Why didn't Paul do it?

00:32:41

Why didn't he stand up for himself? It's puzzling.

00:32:45

Well, regardless, what happens next is

00:32:48

he's hauled off to jail, his feet are put up into stocks,

00:32:52

and he's laid on his back.

00:32:54

Those stocks would have been close to the floor.

00:32:56

So literally, he's spread eagle laying on his wounds

00:33:00

and he does something crazy. He starts to praise God.

00:33:05

Here's how the story continues.

00:33:08

About midnight, Paul and Silas were praying

00:33:10

and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners

00:33:13

were listening to them.

00:33:14

And suddenly there was a great earthquake,

00:33:17

so that the foundations of the prison were shaken.

00:33:20

And immediately all the doors were opened

00:33:22

and everyone's bonds were unfastened.

00:33:24

When the jailer woke and saw that the prison doors were open,

00:33:27

he drew his sword and was about to kill himself,

00:33:30

supposing that the prisoners had escaped.

00:33:32

But Paul cried with a loud voice,

00:33:35

"Do not harm yourself, for we're all here."

00:33:38

And the jailer called for lights, and rushed in,

00:33:41

and trembling with fear,

00:33:42

he fell down before Paul and Silas.

00:33:45

Then he brought them out and said, "Sirs,

00:33:47

what must I do to be saved?"

00:33:50

Okay, so there's a lot of strange details

00:33:52

that seem odd in this story, right?

00:33:54

I mean, he's lying on his back in pain,

00:33:57

horribly, unimaginable pain.

00:33:59

And Paul decides, you know what I'm going to do?

00:34:03

I'm going to sing praises to God.

00:34:06

I'm going to talk about, sing for all to hear

00:34:10

how great God is, how He saved me,

00:34:12

how He's rescued me, how He's delivered me. That's odd.

00:34:16

And then also the earthquake happens.

00:34:17

The prison doors all fall apart and Paul decides to stay.

00:34:22

Very strange.

00:34:23

But neither one of those is the second detail

00:34:26

that's really bothered me about this story.

00:34:28

The second detail that's bothered me

00:34:30

is the jailer's question: Sir, do to be saved?

00:34:36

Now for us, we read a lot of things into that question

00:34:40

that maybe aren't true.

00:34:42

The jailer was Roman, likely a retired Roman soldier,

00:34:46

and in his mind, there was no concept

00:34:49

of some of the things that we might assume.

00:34:51

There was no concept of something called spiritual sin,

00:34:56

or the need for eternal salvation,

00:34:58

or forgiveness or justification,

00:35:00

or how to become righteous

00:35:02

or not even exactly our versions of heaven and hell

00:35:05

and the afterlife. All of that was very, very different.

00:35:08

And so what's bothered me is, where in the world

00:35:11

did the jailer come up with this question?

00:35:15

And then it hit me. He had heard that morning

00:35:18

a slave girl shouting something.

00:35:21

She said, "These men are servants of the Most High God.

00:35:24

They are proclaiming to you the way of salvation." Crazy.

00:35:32

Then later on, I just imagine,

00:35:34

the jailer is in his office and he hears singing,

00:35:39

and he leans in and he listens.

00:35:41

And the words of the songs are about a God who saves,

00:35:48

who heals, who delivers, who forgives.

00:35:51

And the dots in the jailers mind connect.

00:35:56

Why did Paul stay in the circle?

00:35:58

Well, I think it's pretty clear:

00:36:00

Paul stayed in the circle because he got

00:36:03

a nudge from God that on this day, his race

00:36:08

included standing still and enduring the suffering

00:36:12

for the sake of the kingdom of God.

00:36:15

And that's exactly what happens,

00:36:18

because the jailer and his whole family, they believe.

00:36:22

Here's how the story continues.

00:36:24

And they said, "Believe in the Lord Jesus

00:36:27

and you will be saved, you and your whole household."

00:36:31

And they spoke the word of the Lord to him

00:36:32

and to all who were in his house.

00:36:34

And he took them the same hour of the night

00:36:37

and washed their wounds.

00:36:39

And he was baptized at once, he and all his family.

00:36:43

Then he brought them up into his house

00:36:45

and set food before them.

00:36:46

And he rejoiced, along with his entire household

00:36:49

that he had believed in God.

00:36:53

God used Paul's suffering to save,

00:36:56

and it will be the same for us.

00:36:58

We have to get this idea through our minds

00:37:01

at the beginning of learning how to run our race

00:37:03

and run it God's way:

00:37:05

Suffering is not an optional step in the journey.

00:37:08

It'd be awesome if Paul had said, "Good news, everybody.

00:37:13

Ease leads to endurance,

00:37:16

and endurance leads to character

00:37:17

and character leads to hope, begins and ends and ease."

00:37:21

That's not what he said.

00:37:23

He said it's suffering.

00:37:25

Suffering is the first step.

00:37:27

See, there is no following Jesus

00:37:30

without willingly stepping into the circle of suffering.

00:37:35

When I came here years ago with Bob

00:37:37

and was first touring and learning about

00:37:39

all the places that were going in this Journey,

00:37:41

it was actually this spot in this stone,

00:37:43

in this circle that meant the most to me.

00:37:46

Because it's such a sobering picture

00:37:49

of exactly the invitation into the race with God.

00:37:52

Will I step into the circle or will I avoid it?

00:37:56

Will I stay where it's comfortable and safe

00:37:59

and known and everything's in control?

00:38:02

Or will I trust God when He says to step in

00:38:05

and to trust Him, even if it's uncomfortable,

00:38:08

even if it's dangerous, even if it's painful,

00:38:11

even if it stretches me, even if I don't know which way to go?

00:38:14

Will I trust God enough to take the step into the circle?

00:38:44

- Well, welcome to Philippi, everyone.

00:38:46

We've done our best to put you in that ancient place today

00:38:49

where Kyle was actually standing.

00:38:51

My name is Alli Patterson, if you're new around here.

00:38:54

For our Run Journey, I'm one of the teaching pastors

00:38:57

here at Crossroads, and I'm on the Journey with you.

00:38:59

Who met with their group this week? Anybody else?

00:39:03

Lots of hands. We did too.

00:39:04

We had some couples over on Wednesday night,

00:39:07

a few of them we know, a few of them we don't know

00:39:09

and we had a great experience.

00:39:11

We spent some time actually talking through

00:39:14

week one's goal was to name the race.

00:39:17

What's the race that you're in?

00:39:18

What's the path that you're on right now

00:39:20

that you really feel like God's pointing you toward?

00:39:23

This is the one I want your eyes on right now.

00:39:25

So first of all, before I go any further,

00:39:27

because I can hear it already, I've been sick.

00:39:29

Anyone else gotten something lately? Yeah.

00:39:32

So I've been sick all week.

00:39:33

I know you're going to forgive me

00:39:35

if I have to use my tissues, my cough drop,

00:39:37

or my water, so sorry in advance.

00:39:40

I've had to once or twice,

00:39:41

but we're going to get through this together.

00:39:43

So today we're dealing with the reality

00:39:47

that no matter what race we named,

00:39:49

and there's as many as there are people in our community

00:39:52

that named their race this week,

00:39:55

none of them are going to go smoothly.

00:39:58

So today we're dealing with the reality

00:39:59

that how we suffer

00:40:01

will determine how we finish our race.

00:40:03

And some of us walked in here knowing the suffering,

00:40:07

some kind of pain and difficulty

00:40:09

took us out of our race a long time ago,

00:40:11

trying to figure out how to get back on course.

00:40:13

Other people you just named a new race.

00:40:16

And so, hey, welcome. The water's warm.

00:40:19

Today is going to be prep for what's coming your way:

00:40:22

Suffering and difficulty, right?

00:40:25

And others of us are actually squarely

00:40:27

in the middle of it right now.

00:40:29

This whole topic let me like remember this question

00:40:34

that I used to ask myself during actual races.

00:40:38

So when -- the question I asked myself many times

00:40:42

was, what am I going to do at mile 16?

00:40:45

When I was in my 20s, I ran some marathons,

00:40:50

which was, you know, just a year or two ago.

00:40:55

It's not that funny.

00:40:58

I ran some marathons. I still love to run.

00:41:00

Haven't done a marathon in a long time,

00:41:02

but did enough that at mile 16, every single time

00:41:08

I had to ask myself: what am I going to do right now?

00:41:12

Because mile 16 is a unique low point

00:41:16

in the marathon race.

00:41:18

Let me paint you a picture, marathon 26.2 miles.

00:41:21

The point two is just -- it's just cruel and unusual, right?

00:41:26

26.2 miles. And at mile 16, you are hurting.

00:41:30

You are chafing.

00:41:32

You are asking yourself, "Why did I do this again?"

00:41:36

And then you see the mile 16 marker.

00:41:38

And the math is really easy.

00:41:42

You passed that mile 16 marker and you do the math

00:41:45

and you go, "I can't possibly run another ten miles.

00:41:52

Ten more miles from here." It's like mind blowing.

00:41:58

And so every single race, not just my first one,

00:42:01

where it took me by surprise, but every single time

00:42:05

I would pass the mile 16 mile marker

00:42:08

and I would think to myself,

00:42:10

"What I do in the next period of time right now

00:42:14

is going to determine how I cross the finish line."

00:42:16

And let me tell you what I see around mile 16,

00:42:19

maybe 17, in that ballpark, every single race I did,

00:42:23

I would see this, people would be they're going,

00:42:26

they're doing their thing.

00:42:27

And all of a sudden they're like, "I'm out. This is -- no."

00:42:32

Or I would see people who would literally,

00:42:35

they're trying their hardest, but they collapse,

00:42:39

they're injured, they're out and they're done,

00:42:42

and they just get pulled off the course.

00:42:45

And I would also see people who were keeping stride,

00:42:48

but who started to slow down,

00:42:49

like significantly around this time.

00:42:51

Maybe they hit a walk.

00:42:53

Maybe I see a few of them hours later,

00:42:56

literally sometimes crawling across the finish line

00:42:59

just because they want to finish their marathon.

00:43:02

And it all happens right around mile 16.

00:43:06

It was the low point every single time.

00:43:09

Your mile 16 in any race you named is coming.

00:43:13

And I wish I wasn't the one standing up here

00:43:16

on week two going let's talk about

00:43:19

all your suffering at mile 16.

00:43:21

But if we don't, you're going to get off course.

00:43:25

You're going to be the one that gets dragged off,

00:43:27

or you're just going to go, "You know what?

00:43:29

It's too much. I'm out."

00:43:30

And if we can learn to expect it

00:43:32

and if we can learn to understand it's part of

00:43:35

an arc in the story that God is going to tell in our life,

00:43:39

then we can actually deal with it in a way that is Romans 5.

00:43:43

Here's our our verses for our whole Journey

00:43:46

come from Romans 5, and they're a reminder

00:43:48

of what suffering well actually ends up in.

00:43:53

We rejoice in our sufferings,

00:43:55

knowing that suffering produces endurance,

00:43:58

endurance produces character,

00:43:59

and character produces hope.

00:44:02

You can suffer well, and that can be your arc,

00:44:06

or you can suffer badly

00:44:08

and you can get pulled off the course.

00:44:10

Today our goal is to figure out how do we handle suffering

00:44:13

so we get the good stuff,

00:44:15

because that's what God has promised.

00:44:18

He's promised that if we can suffer well,

00:44:20

if we can figure out how to do that,

00:44:22

it will push us into an arc that will find an end point in hope.

00:44:27

And that is what I want.

00:44:28

I'm going to take you into some suffering in my life

00:44:31

that actually started a long, long time ago.

00:44:34

And I'm not picking it because it has a nice ending.

00:44:37

I'm picking it because I can see the whole arc.

00:44:41

I can see that that suffering is bad and as painful as it was,

00:44:47

has made the entire journey.

00:44:49

And I want you to get in it with me today,

00:44:52

because there are three things that I learned

00:44:54

in the darkest place, which was actually quite a long time ago.

00:44:58

And now that I've made the entire arc,

00:45:00

I can actually see some things that took place

00:45:03

in that really low mile 16 spot that I think

00:45:08

are at least part of the key to suffering well.

00:45:12

The first one of those is to stop obsessing

00:45:16

about the beginning of our suffering.

00:45:19

We get caught in a swirl of how did this all start?

00:45:25

Why me? What are these circumstances?

00:45:28

How did I get here? Whose fault is it?

00:45:32

Why? Why did -- why did this come into my life?

00:45:35

And how do -- how am I supposed to be

00:45:38

the one that goes through this? It's just not right.

00:45:40

And we get caught in the swirl of the beginning.

00:45:44

And if we allow ourselves to get in t

00:45:46

he who, what, where, when, why,

00:45:48

who's to blame swirl of our suffering,

00:45:50

we will not move forward on our journey.

00:45:53

We will stay right there, and we will not only

00:45:55

stay right there, we will guaranteed get bitter about it.

00:46:01

My conviction about this arc that God wants us in is this.

00:46:07

It doesn't matter how the suffering starts

00:46:11

and we don't want that answer.

00:46:13

We want there to be two different categories,

00:46:14

like the suffering I deserve

00:46:16

and the suffering I don't deserve or something.

00:46:18

And you know, God should take away one

00:46:21

and use the other one, and that's just not how it works.

00:46:26

We see suffering come into the lives of people

00:46:29

in Scripture and out of Scriptuhre all the time,

00:46:31

tat doesn't seem to be what makes the difference.

00:46:33

And so when we swirl on the beginning

00:46:36

and we decide it's in the category

00:46:37

that shouldn't have happened,

00:46:39

we never actually move forward in our journey.

00:46:43

And listen, I know those answers matter to you.

00:46:46

They matter to me.

00:46:47

We all want to rewind and unwind and figure out

00:46:50

how we got in the mess to begin with. Right?

00:46:53

We want those answers.

00:46:54

And I will tell you, I think a lot of us know this

00:46:57

who've been through difficulties.

00:46:58

Sometimes on a healing leg of your journey,

00:47:01

it can be helpful to go back and understand, you know,

00:47:04

the past and the patterns a little bit,

00:47:06

and it can actually be a helpful part of a healing journey.

00:47:10

But not at mile 16.

00:47:13

At mile 16, something else is going to move us forward.

00:47:17

It's not going to be the obsessive swirl

00:47:21

over why all of this started to begin with.

00:47:23

Now, some of you are mad at me already about this.

00:47:26

It's all right. I can take it.

00:47:27

You're like, "Okay, I can maybe get on board

00:47:30

with the fact that God will, you know,

00:47:32

bring some hardship into my life.

00:47:34

But not not this.

00:47:36

You don't understand my story. This wasn't okay.

00:47:39

It just shouldn't have been."

00:47:41

And I don't. I don't know your story, I really don't.

00:47:45

But I know Paul's.

00:47:47

I know the one that we just heard from Kyle,

00:47:49

and we can see in that story exactly where the beginning was.

00:47:53

Let's go back into that for just a second.

00:47:56

In Acts 16, there's a girl.

00:47:58

She's following them around for days on end,

00:48:01

and she's yelling because of a spirit that's possessing her,

00:48:03

"These men are from God.

00:48:04

They know the way of salvation."

00:48:06

And here's what Acts 16 says again.

00:48:09

And she kept doing this for many days.

00:48:12

Paul, having become greatly annoyed, turned

00:48:14

and said to the spirit, "I command you

00:48:16

in the name of Jesus Christ to come out of her."

00:48:19

And it came out that very hour.

00:48:25

So here we are, that's the beginning,

00:48:27

because it was right after that

00:48:29

that the owners of the girl got mad.

00:48:32

They drag him into the marketplace.

00:48:33

He gets accused, beaten, bloodied and thrown in prison.

00:48:37

And that was the beginning.

00:48:39

An annoyance and a deliverance that you could argue,

00:48:43

big picture for that girl,

00:48:45

was maybe the greatest kindness she had ever received.

00:48:51

And that was the beginning of Paul.

00:48:53

And yet not a hint of bitterness,

00:48:56

not only in this story,

00:48:58

but never, never in all of Paul's journey,

00:49:01

in all of his sufferings, do we get a hint of bitterness.

00:49:03

If you read the book called Philippians,

00:49:06

which is a letter that Paul later wrote back

00:49:08

to these same people that are in this area

00:49:11

that he's dealing with in this story from Acts.

00:49:13

He writes them a letter when he's moved on,

00:49:16

and he reminds them, "Don't forget,

00:49:20

rejoice in all circumstances."

00:49:23

And the crazy thing about that letter is that

00:49:26

it got written when he was in jail,

00:49:28

again, later somewhere else.

00:49:32

And it's one of the happiest letters in the Bible.

00:49:34

And if you read that letter, you can tell that Paul,

00:49:37

not only not now, while he's going through it in Acts 16,

00:49:41

but never did he take on any sort of bitterness

00:49:44

about the suffering that began like this.

00:49:48

And many other instances in his life

00:49:50

that were pretty similar to this.

00:49:53

And I think we assign the people in the Bible,

00:49:56

you know, they're in the Bible. They can do that.

00:49:59

They just get beat and sing praises. You know?

00:50:02

I don't -- I don't know, what do we tell ourselves?

00:50:05

We tell ourselves they're like these special people.

00:50:07

They're holier than me. Of course, that's what he does.

00:50:11

You know, it's Paul.

00:50:13

I don't think so.

00:50:16

I think it's that Paul was with Jesus enough

00:50:20

that he began to understand this is the beginning

00:50:22

of something that you're going to turn into

00:50:25

whatever life you're bringing me on.

00:50:30

That this is the course and that maybe

00:50:32

with every new suffering, his mindset was like,

00:50:36

"Oh, wait, this is the beginning of this arc.

00:50:41

And so how can I hate it? I guess I'm in again, Lord."

00:50:47

Maybe it's that Paul began to take on that mindset.

00:50:49

Now, one of my mile 16 moments

00:50:52

that I'm going to share with you here in a second.

00:50:54

It was - if Paul's began with, like,

00:50:57

a minor annoyance, turned into an act of kindness.

00:51:02

Mine was, like, as far away from that

00:51:04

as you could possibly get.

00:51:06

It was more like your bad character

00:51:11

led to bad choices that led to sin

00:51:14

that just about took you out.

00:51:17

As far away from this origin of Paul's story as possible.

00:51:23

And we don't like the fact that no matter which one it is,

00:51:27

God is taking us on the same journey

00:51:30

in the middle of that suffering.

00:51:32

And mine, my mile 16 moment.

00:51:38

If you've been around Crossroads long enough,

00:51:40

you've probably heard me talk about this before.

00:51:42

Shortly after we got married, many years ago,

00:51:44

I had an affair and that led to a time

00:51:48

of really deep suffering, not just for me,

00:51:53

but for the other people that it impacted as well.

00:51:56

And it was a time where the pain that I was dealing with

00:52:01

was so big that I would open my eyes in the morning,

00:52:05

and the only good part of my day

00:52:07

was the half second before I realized

00:52:09

the life that I was living again.

00:52:12

I don't know if you've ever been in that kind of pain,

00:52:14

but it was like crushing to the point where I didn't --

00:52:18

I didn't know how to get out of it.

00:52:20

And worse yet, I was in the swirl of the beginning

00:52:24

where I knew this is my fault.

00:52:30

And so that means there's probably no way out for me.

00:52:34

And I would just swirl.

00:52:36

In the beginning I tried blaming myself

00:52:40

as deeply as I could for as long as I could,

00:52:43

to feel as bad as I could, in all the guilt

00:52:45

and all the shame that I felt I deserved,

00:52:47

and it didn't move me forward.

00:52:50

And then I tried to rewind the past, like,

00:52:54

how did I get here? And what's wrong with me?

00:52:56

And where is it? You know, where, where did it begin?

00:52:59

And what are all the factors and the reasons?

00:53:01

And that did not move me forward.

00:53:03

And then I listened to all the voices

00:53:07

that are really happy to tell you, "You know what?

00:53:09

This mile 16, nobody gets past this one.

00:53:14

You might as well just go back. Just crawl off the course.

00:53:19

There's no way forward."

00:53:21

And so it's the swirl, you know,

00:53:24

that that freezes us, that we get stuck in.

00:53:27

And none of that ever moved me an inch forward

00:53:32

in the journey that God actually had

00:53:35

to use that to produce endurance and character

00:53:38

and a life of hope again.

00:53:39

But you know what did? Nnumber two. Number two.

00:53:45

The second thing, and I'll be honest and say

00:53:47

I sort of accidentally discovered this one.

00:53:50

It's like a hindsight 20/20 sort of situation.

00:53:54

And nonetheless, number two is the thing

00:53:57

that moved me forward was when I stopped trying to control it.

00:54:04

When I stopped trying to control what was happening,

00:54:08

I actually started to move again.

00:54:10

Let me explain. See, we reach to save whatever we can

00:54:14

when we're on the way down into pain and difficulty.

00:54:17

We know, you know, you know that it is.

00:54:21

And you don't really want to end up

00:54:24

all the way at the bottom, obviously.

00:54:26

And so you just reach out to save what you can.

00:54:30

And a lot of times that you grab for things like that

00:54:34

and you just hold on to hold it together

00:54:38

as much as you possibly can, so that you don't make it

00:54:41

all the way to the bottom.

00:54:43

Now, the Bible has a word for this process

00:54:45

of starting in one place, up higher

00:54:49

and actually taking a path down low.

00:54:52

And it's called humiliation.

00:54:56

Humiliation we use to mean embarrassment.

00:55:01

I mean, a fall from up higher, a journey down

00:55:04

can be embarrassing sometimes, but not always.

00:55:07

Sometimes things come into our life

00:55:09

and we land in a low place.

00:55:10

And it's really not embarrassing.

00:55:12

It is still a journey down to a really, really low place.

00:55:19

Maybe you're in a different kind of path down.

00:55:21

Maybe, you know, someone is sick in your life

00:55:25

and you can't fix it

00:55:27

and you're in a really low place about it.

00:55:29

Maybe you're in a dead end job and you can't quit

00:55:31

because you need to pay your bills,

00:55:32

and you don't know the way forward,

00:55:34

and you're still there and you promised yourself

00:55:36

you were going to be gone by now.

00:55:41

And you started up here, and now you're really low.

00:55:44

And maybe some of us have lost somebody,

00:55:47

or we're in the middle of a bad breakup,

00:55:49

or we're realizing our finances don't fit together,

00:55:51

or we're struggling with the thing that we're like,

00:55:53

you know what? I thought I was okay with this,

00:55:56

and I'm now beginning to realize,

00:55:59

I think this is an addiction.

00:56:02

It's a downward path, a humiliation to a low place.

00:56:09

And the Bible actually calls that process that word.

00:56:18

And it's linked to the word humility.

00:56:22

When when we get into that low place

00:56:24

and we're actually willing to just say it.

00:56:28

What if, what if holding on to whatever you can hold on to

00:56:34

to prevent yourself from being just an inch above collapse,

00:56:38

what if holding on is the thing

00:56:39

that's actually preventing you from moving on?

00:56:43

Because we use all of our might

00:56:44

not to make it all the way to the bottom.

00:56:47

But the Bible doesn't represent that process

00:56:49

in quite the same way.

00:56:52

I went through this moment with God in an elevator,

00:56:55

and I said I kind of accidentally discovered this,

00:56:59

like, you need to stop controlling it.

00:57:01

If you want to get back on course just stop.

00:57:05

And I was in an elevator, and I pushed the button,

00:57:08

and I was going up, and I was by myself.

00:57:10

And I was in this terrible, terrible time of my life.

00:57:13

And I said out loud to God in the elevator,

00:57:16

"You know what I'm just going to do?

00:57:17

I don't know what to do. So whatever happens,

00:57:22

I'm just going to start telling the truth.

00:57:24

If somebody asks me a question,

00:57:26

I'm just going to answer it."

00:57:31

And it's almost like he heard me, you guys.

00:57:33

It's almost like he heard me in the elevator that day.

00:57:37

Because wouldn't you know it, time after time after time,

00:57:40

in the coming weeks, I had the chance

00:57:43

to just confess the truth.

00:57:46

I went through that with my husband.

00:57:48

I went through that with my friends.

00:57:49

I went through that with all kinds of things

00:57:52

that I was firmly convinced in this situation

00:57:56

would be my ruin.

00:57:59

But when I made God that promise, I accidentally

00:58:03

stumbled into the truth of the humiliation

00:58:06

that actually, when you tell the truth

00:58:09

about the low place, the pain, the difficulty,

00:58:14

you get yourself back on course.

00:58:16

It is. It's the craziest thing I've ever experienced.

00:58:20

The things that I thought were going to take me out for good,

00:58:23

actually, were the things that God used

00:58:25

to redirect my path to a race that

00:58:28

He could start to lead because I wasn't in control anymore.

00:58:33

I wasn't trying to grasp and save and protect

00:58:36

and do all the things we do when we know

00:58:39

we're in this process of humiliation,

00:58:41

because we just don't want to get all the way to the bottom.

00:58:43

This week in your groups, maybe you're going to say

00:58:46

out loud for the first time, "I know it looks like

00:58:50

my life is going fine, but I have this one place

00:58:53

where I'm really, really low."

00:58:57

That might be the thing you need

00:59:00

that starts a whole new journey out of that space.

00:59:06

Letting myself get all the way to the bottom

00:59:09

of the humiliation is what moved me forward in the end.

00:59:14

Because God can work in that space

00:59:16

when we just stop trying to control it all.

00:59:21

And that brings me to number three.

00:59:25

Number three is where we find Paul.

00:59:28

And I use this language because of the story we're in.

00:59:31

Number three, the thing that I learned

00:59:32

about these low places where God can move

00:59:35

is that we have to stay in the circle.

00:59:38

Remember the circle Kyle stepped into in the bema

00:59:41

in Philippi, the place of Paul's great suffering?

00:59:45

Once we are in that space and we step willingly into it,

00:59:49

we have to stay there long enough to understand that

00:59:53

we are going to actually experience God in that space.

00:59:58

He does amazing things in that space.

01:00:01

Remember Kyle, he wondered, why didn't Paul

01:00:05

play the Roman citizen card?

01:00:07

Why didn't he stop it?

01:00:08

Why did he seem willing? Willing, in a weird way,

01:00:12

to walk into this? When he had the trump card?

01:00:15

He could have stopped it.

01:00:17

And even more strange, even more strange,

01:00:22

was the fact that when he got all the way down,

01:00:25

it was bloodied and beaten in a jail cell.

01:00:30

And he did the craziest thing.

01:00:33

He started singing at the very, very bottom.

01:00:38

Now, I'll tell you my honest reaction to that story,

01:00:41

as strange as it sounds to say that, you know,

01:00:44

he was singing in this jail cell all the way low.

01:00:47

I thought, "That's actually the part of the story

01:00:49

I understand, because it happened to me.

01:00:54

In the same period of time in my life.

01:00:57

I was in my kitchen thinking, honestly,

01:01:00

as I look back on it, it might honestly be

01:01:03

among the worst couple days of my entire life.

01:01:06

And I was in the kitchen, and I was dealing with

01:01:08

the reality of the life that I thought

01:01:11

I was going to live is very likely gone.

01:01:14

My marriage is probably gone. My job is probably gone.

01:01:16

My friends are definitely gone.

01:01:18

All the things that I thought

01:01:20

I was going to be living were gone.

01:01:25

And I'm standing in my kitchen

01:01:27

and I actually started singing to Jesus.

01:01:33

And it was just as weird as it sounds in the Paul story.

01:01:37

See, for a couple of weeks previous,

01:01:39

I had been talking to God a lot.

01:01:40

I knew that He was around this situation,

01:01:43

that He was in my life, that He was nearby,

01:01:46

I just couldn't make out what do You want from me?

01:01:49

I don't know what to do right now.

01:01:51

And so I'm in the kitchen and I'm like,

01:01:52

nobody else has wanted to be around me.

01:01:54

So I would wake up every day and I would read my Bible

01:01:56

like it was my lifeline. You know?

01:01:58

Just looking for anything in there that might help me.

01:02:01

And I would talk to God all day long

01:02:02

because nobody else wanted to talk to me.

01:02:06

And so I would just talk to God.

01:02:07

And so I'm in my kitchen after a couple weeks of this,

01:02:11

and out of my mouth pops a song

01:02:14

I don't really even ever remember learning.

01:02:18

And I start singing to Jesus.

01:02:20

And I think the reason was the same

01:02:23

as it very likely was for Paul. He was there.

01:02:29

He was right there with me.

01:02:33

I'm in the kitchen. Paul's in the cell.

01:02:35

You're going to be wherever you're going to be,

01:02:37

and you're going to understand,

01:02:38

"Oh, wait, I'm inside this suffering.

01:02:42

But God is here.

01:02:44

He's right here in the middle of it with me.

01:02:47

How is that possible?

01:02:49

Nobody else wants to be in this with me.

01:02:52

But He's here in the circle of our suffering.

01:02:56

And we spend so much time trying to stay away from it,

01:03:00

trying to hold ourselves above it,

01:03:01

trying to step out of it that we don't understand

01:03:04

we're stealing from ourselves tThe very thing

01:03:07

the slave girl ran around yelling, "These guys,

01:03:09

they know the way to salvation."

01:03:12

Paul knew, that's why he stepped into the circle.

01:03:17

He knew that in his deepest suffering,

01:03:19

no matter where that was going to lead,

01:03:21

he was going to meet Jesus there.

01:03:23

And when I started singing this song

01:03:28

that day in the kitchen it made me understand

01:03:31

that worship is our natural response to the presence of God.

01:03:35

It's not some, it's not some like weird, crazy thing.

01:03:39

It's when you have God in your face and in your space,

01:03:44

what you do is you respond in worship.

01:03:46

And lyrics, they kind of stick on us.

01:03:49

You know, that's really unfortunate for me

01:03:51

because I have some from the 90s.

01:03:55

A little Salt-n-Pepa I wish I didn't remember

01:03:58

quite as well as I do.

01:04:00

But I'm in the kitchen

01:04:02

and here's what came out of my mouth.

01:04:07

[singing] I love You, Lord,

01:04:11

and I lift my voice to worship You.

01:04:20

Oh my soul, rejoice.

01:04:26

Take joy, my King, in what You hear.

01:04:35

May it be a sweet, sweet sound in Your ears.

01:04:45

And I just started -- I just started singing.

01:04:48

Rejoice!? Are you kidding me?

01:04:50

This is the lowest moment of my life.

01:04:52

But I was responding to the fact that

01:04:55

the way of salvation was in my kitchen with me.

01:04:59

The God who takes that moment and turns it into

01:05:02

a life of hope. Who knew?

01:05:05

Who knew that in that low moment, in that encounter,

01:05:08

what I was actually doing is getting back on course

01:05:11

with the God who knew exactly how to save me.

01:05:14

He knew exactly how to save my marriage.

01:05:16

He knew exactly how to save my race,

01:05:19

so that a couple years later,

01:05:21

not only would I still be be married,

01:05:23

but I would be leaving my corporate race

01:05:26

to try to spend my life telling other people that God,

01:05:30

the God that you're looking for, is the God

01:05:32

who's coming into your lowest place,

01:05:35

your worst moment, and He wants you there.

01:05:38

And He came from a place on high,

01:05:40

and He came all the way down as low as He could get,

01:05:43

so He could find you in that space and pick you up

01:05:47

and put you on a new journey forward.

01:05:49

That's who you're looking for. [applause]

01:05:57

And He was in Paul's cell, too.

01:05:59

You know that song became a reminder for me

01:06:02

every time I've suffered.

01:06:03

I wish I could tell you that that was

01:06:05

the last time I sang it, but it wasn't.

01:06:06

I've sung it a number of other times.

01:06:09

It's almost become like my reminder that

01:06:12

when I'm in that place, so is Jesus. So is Jesus.

01:06:17

I've sung it at 4:00 in the morning

01:06:19

when I'm nursing my fourth baby in six years, and I'm weary.

01:06:24

I have sung it when I lost a friend.

01:06:26

I sang it when I was publicly smeared

01:06:29

for something that was just completely untrue.

01:06:32

And it's become the moment that I come back to

01:06:38

to say, wait, don't fight this because Jesus is in it.

01:06:44

And so I asked Justin, our wonderful Oakley worship leader,

01:06:48

to help me offer that song to you.

01:06:51

Maybe you'll discover your own. That would be great too.

01:06:54

But you can have mine.

01:06:56

And I thought we could just take a moment

01:06:58

and just remember what I remember every time I sing it,

01:07:03

which is Jesus is in the circle of suffering.

01:08:03

- And I think about Paul.

01:08:06

I don't think he had instruments in there with him that night,

01:08:09

but Jesus was with him.

01:08:12

And so how about we sing it just like he did?

01:08:14

And if you're in your circle of suffering

01:08:17

and sing it right in the presence of Jesus

01:08:20

with our voices and our hearts.

01:09:17

- Have you ever heard somebody say

01:09:19

at some later point in their life,

01:09:21

"I can't even hate that terrible thing

01:09:23

that happened to me because of where it took me."

01:09:27

That's somebody who learned to suffer well.

01:09:29

That's somebody who let God get a hold of their suffering

01:09:34

and turn it into endurance and turn it into character

01:09:36

and turn it in to a life that has hope again.

01:09:40

That is somebody who suffered well.

01:09:44

And so this week, as you do your work,

01:09:47

as you go on this Journey one more step,

01:09:49

you're going to be asked a question

01:09:51

in your group this week.

01:09:52

And the question is: how is weakness or pain

01:09:55

or difficulty in your way on the race?

01:09:59

And the goal that we're going to help each other toward

01:10:02

is to meet Jesus in that space, to find Him in that space.

01:10:07

And as you do that, I want you to remember

01:10:09

the words that Jesus himself spoke to Paul.

01:10:11

Paul went to Jesus at one point and said,

01:10:13

"I've got this thorn in my flesh. It's painful.

01:10:16

I want You to get rid of it.

01:10:17

I want You to take it away from me."

01:10:19

And Jesus said to him, "My grace is sufficient for you,

01:10:23

because My power is made perfect in weakness."

01:10:28

So I want you to remind each other of those words

01:10:30

as you deal with your own suffering this week.

01:10:34

Let me pray for us. Lord, help us not to be afraid

01:10:38

of the difficulty that You've put in our path,

01:10:40

but instead to go into it eyes open for You,

01:10:44

looking for You, knowing that when we find You

01:10:47

You will turn it into all the good stuff

01:10:50

that's coming for us.

01:10:52

We trust You as the way of salvation.

01:10:55

Jesus, it's in Your precious name that I pray. Amen.

01:10:59

- That's our prayer that God would use

01:11:02

whatever's going on in our life, the good and the bad,

01:11:06

when things are celebratory

01:11:07

and even when we're suffering,

01:11:09

that God can use that to point us towards Him

01:11:12

and to make us more like Him.

01:11:15

Hey, if you've experienced anything today

01:11:17

that you want help processing, especially

01:11:19

if maybe you are in a place of suffering

01:11:21

or just need some extra prayer and encouragement,

01:11:23

we'd love to do that.

01:11:24

You can just email us at anywhere@crossroads.net.

01:11:26

And myself or a member of my team

01:11:28

would love to connect with you, pray for you,

01:11:30

do whatever we can to help you.

01:11:31

Now, real quick, before we're done,

01:11:33

just a few things you need to know.

01:11:34

Hey, keep going with your individual work

01:11:36

in the Run Journey guide.

01:11:38

This is an incredible way for you to lean in

01:11:40

and get the most out of this Run Journey

01:11:42

and experience suffering well from God's perspective.

01:11:46

Secondly, hey, keep going with your groups.

01:11:48

I had 50 dudes in my Run Journey group this past Wednesday night.

01:11:51

Would love for you to join us,

01:11:53

or whatever group you're in,

01:11:54

keep going with that work as well.

01:11:55

Third, if you have a middle school or high school student

01:11:58

who lives near one of our physical campuses

01:12:00

or within driving range, hey,

01:12:01

we have Big Night happening next Friday.

01:12:04

Would love for you to join.

01:12:05

It's going to be an incredible time.

01:12:07

We've got Dante Bowe, Insane Shayne.

01:12:08

It's gonna be an incredible time.

01:12:10

Hey guys, thanks for being with us on the Run Journey.

01:12:12

We'll see you guys next week.

Recent Series