How Embracing Weakness Can Change Your Life | Mindset Week 3

God wants us to find power and peace in our lives. Here are the things that get in the way, and how to get past them.

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    You were made to be brave.
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    You were born to make a difference.
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    God designed you for heart pumping, joy-filled adventure
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    and we're here to guide you to that adventurous life.
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    Crossroads Church. Hey, everyone, and welcome to Crossroads.
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    My name is Hannah Shepherd,
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    and we are in the middle of a series called Mindset
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    where we're learning about how to allow God
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    to take our thoughts and emotions captive.
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    At this point in isolation, if you're anything like me,
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    you may have been struggling to keep your mind in a healthy place.
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    Don't we all wish that there was just a secret superpower
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    that could help us? Well, it turns out that God says there actually
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    is. One of our teaching pastors, Kyle Ranson,
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    is going to reveal that secret superpower
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    in a way that can help transform us all.
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    There's a clue in the next video.
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    - When dark days full of fear and doubt attack our mindset,
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    when our thoughts and emotions have us by the throat,
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    when storms rage all around, we need heroes.
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    Now is the time to look in the mirror to find them,
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    because you were made to have the mighty mindset of a super hero,
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    to have the strength to control your emotions,
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    the ability to see through the chaos,
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    to survive pandemics, defeat evil villains, and save the day.
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    But to get there,
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    you must first defeat the supervillain standing in your way:
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    the dynamic and deadly duo known as Pride and Shame.
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    If we can solve this riddle, we can unleash the hero in us all.
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    - Hi, I'm Kyle. I'm one of the teaching pastors at Crossroads.
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    Welcome to my workshop, where I've spent
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    most of the last two months under the stay at home orders
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    with my wife and three children.
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    I mean, they're not here exactly.
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    They're in the house right over there.
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    But I spent a lot of time here in my workshop,
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    more so now than even before.
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    This is where I build things like this.
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    Right now this is in the process of being transformed
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    into an outdoor sofa.
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    Now, when you build something, you've got to have
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    the idea of what you want it to become in your mind.
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    And I'm not quite ready to nail down my plans yet.
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    I've been sketching and trying to figure out
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    what I wanted to look like.
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    But before I start actually cutting this wood up,
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    I have to know what I wanted to become.
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    I want you to think back to when you first thought
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    about what you wanted to become back when you were a kid.
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    For me, the first thing I wanted to become,
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    the first career I wanted was that of a superhero.
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    I thought that'd be fantastic.
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    And not just any superhero, very specifically,
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    I wanted to be Superman.
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    I don't know if it was the red underwear on the outside
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    or the blue tights or whatever, I thought it'd be fantastic.
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    And then I learned that's not actual possibility.
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    But what we're learning in this pandemic
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    is that there are jobs in which you can be a superhero.
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    Right? We're learning things like doctors and nurses are superheroes,
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    but not just that, grocery store workers,
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    delivery drivers, mask makers, meat packers are all superheroes.
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    And if you're one of those frontline superheroes,
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    let me just say on behalf of me and my family, thank you.
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    We are so grateful for the way you're serving us.
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    Now I think this thing of wanting to be a superhero is not an
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    accident. If you're like me as a kid, you wanted to be one.
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    I think that's a hard wired desire put in us by God.
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    He actually wants us to be superheroes.
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    You might be like, "Hold on, Kyle.
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    Time out. Are you saying we're the superheroes?
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    Because that's a little bit presumptuous.
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    I thought in the story that Jesus was the superhero."
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    Yeah, totally. Jesus is the superhero.
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    But here's the thing, part of his mission according to Him,
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    was making more superheroes.
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    He actually said that in John, 14:12:
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    He says you'll do greater things than Me,
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    like the super heroic stuff I've been doing,
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    you'll do that and even more.
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    He hasn't created us to be conformed
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    to the normal patterns of this world.
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    In other words, if He's made you to be a mom,
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    he hasn't made you to be conformed to
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    the normal patterns of being a mom.
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    He's made you to be, I believe, a super heroic mom.
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    And if he's made you to be a husband,
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    He hasn't made you to conform the normal patterns of being a husband.
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    He's made you to be a super heroic husband.
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    If He's made you to be a friend or a leader or a worker
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    or a teacher or whatever, I don't think He's made you
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    to be conformed to normal patterns of those things.
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    He's made you to be a super heroic version of all of those roles.
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    The key to it though is a transformation,
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    not a physical transformation, a mental transformation,
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    a transformation of the mind.
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    Romans 12:2 puts it this way:
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    Now think about superhero stories with me for a second,
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    which, by the way, I know they're not true,
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    but Scripture says that God has hidden His truths in creation.
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    Well, movies are a created thing and if there's something
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    in them that resonates with us, often times it's because
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    they're revealing a deeper truth of God,
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    like this verse that we just read.
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    Think with me for a second about the story of Bruce Banner.
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    What's the most important transformation he undergoes?
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    It's not the transformation of gamma rays
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    where he becomes the Hulk and big and massive.
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    It's not the most critical transformation.
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    It's the transformation of his mind,
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    when he goes from anger, the normal pattern of anger
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    to love, gentleness, and care.
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    What's the most important transformation in the story of Iron Man?
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    It's not Tony Stark building better and better
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    and better and better suits.
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    It's not. It's the transformation of his mind
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    where he goes from selfishness to selflessness.
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    It's the critical transformation that every superhero must undergo,
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    you and I include it.
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    But the transformation of your mind won't happen without a fight,
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    because just like an every superhero story,
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    there are enemies standing in your way and they have names.
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    Their names are pride and his sinister sidekick known as shame.
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    They're a dynamic duo
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    whose goal is to prevent your transformation.
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    They work like this: pride talks to you about your problems.
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    And he says, "You don't have any problems.
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    You're not the problem.
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    You know who the problem is? Do you know who needs to change?
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    Them. They're -- I think they're way off.
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    I mean, you are amazing.
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    Everything about you is amazing.
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    Your skin is flawless.
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    It glows all the time.
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    Your farts, they smell like freshly baked bread.
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    You are perfect the way you are you shouldn't change."
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    And shame says almost the exact opposite.
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    Shame says, "Oh my gosh, you have so many problems,
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    and not just so many problems.
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    You have problems that could like never be overcome.
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    I mean you are -- you're hopeless.
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    You are utterly hopeless.
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    You should give up. You should probably just give up."
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    And together they are a powerful and dynamic duo.
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    Now, you will not experience transformation
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    if they're not defeated. And I have to be honest with you,
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    you can't do it on your own.
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    You can't. But, with God's help, they can be overcome.
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    The transformation of your mind goes through these two.
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    Now, to understand how that works,
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    we've got a first dig underneath the surface
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    and talk about underlying conditions.
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    This is one of those phrases that
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    none of us knew even existed just a few months ago,
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    but now we hear about it nearly every day,
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    along with phrases like social distancing
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    and flatten the curve and Tiger King
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    and now Murder Hornet, whatever that is.
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    I just -- it's something to be terrified of, I guess.
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    I don't know. But we all have underlying conditions, whether or not
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    we have something that makes us prone to COVID-19,
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    we have these underlying conditions,
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    weaknesses that threaten our future.
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    These are the very thing God wants to transform.
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    Now, how would you know which ones you have?
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    You would need some form of a detector.
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    Stud finder works, it's good to know.
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    Thankfully, God's given us expert underlying condition detectors,
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    and we've been locked in the same home with them
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    for months so they've had plenty of time to do their job.
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    My underlying condition detectors are named
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    Sarah, Ben, Eli, and Gracie,
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    and they've been pointing out my underlying conditions.
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    Chances are you've been experiencing the same thing.
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    I don't know what yours have pointed out,
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    but mine have detected things like temper.
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    Mine have detected things like pessimism.
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    Maybe for you it's things like
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    you just can't put a frigging dish in the dishwasher.
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    It's right there. Just put your dish right here,
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    right there in the dishwasher.
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    Maybe it's your inability to put down a toilet seat.
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    Or maybe it's something more serious.
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    Maybe it's something like your drinking habit
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    that's gone from a once a week cocktail to a daily event
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    that happens earlier and earlier in the day.
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    Maybe it's your spending patterns.
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    Maybe to fight boredom you've been buying more and more
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    and more and more and more.
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    I don't know what it is for you,
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    but the road to transformation hinges on your ability
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    to have those underlying conditions transformed.
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    The way to do it is to adopt the mindset of Christ.
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    This is what it says in Philippians 2:
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    Now you're gonna deal with both of these in your life:
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    pride and shame, maybe even in the same day.
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    But let's talk about how to defeat pride first.
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    The key to it is in the verse we just read:
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    adopting the mindset of Christ,
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    which is the mindset of humility.
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    Humility is a choice, a very specific choice
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    to admit something critically important:
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    that I have underlying conditions, that I am weak.
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    The mindset of weakness is how God says
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    you will defeat pride.
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    Now, when all this virus coverage started,
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    I heard this term "underlying conditions."
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    And I, like everybody, wanted to know what they were,
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    because if you have them, it makes you more susceptible to the virus.
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    And I heard about things like, you know,
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    age and diabetes and heart disease,
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    and I thought, great, I'm fine.
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    And then it literally took me probably two weeks
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    into the virus to realize that lung diseases
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    are also an underlying condition,
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    a weakness that makes you proud of the COVID virus.
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    And I suddenly remembered something very important,
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    which is I have asthma.
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    I had honestly completely forgotten about it because,
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    praise God, I've been symptom free for almost two decades.
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    But suddenly it wasn't the forefront of my mind
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    and this memory came flooding back.
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    I was probably four years old or so and I remember
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    waking up in the middle of the night and I could not breathe.
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    If you've never felt this before,
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    it's like steel cable is wrapped around your chest
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    preventing your lungs from expanding enough
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    to fill up with enough air to breathe.
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    It's the most panic inducing feeling you can experience,
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    at least that I've ever experienced.
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    Do you know, I don't think that asthma is
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    the underlying condition that most threatens my future.
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    And it's not because I don't believe the virus isn't real
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    or that it shouldn't be a concern. It's not it at all.
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    See, I believe there's a much more dangerous
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    underlying condition that has been clearly pointed out to me
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    over the last few months: it's anger.
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    It's the one that threatens me from ever becoming
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    the superhero God wants me to become.
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    Sarah calls it the bark.
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    It flares up at night mostly.
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    We're at the end of the day.
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    I finally will get done with work, I'll head inside.
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    We'll eat dinner, we'll do everything, we'll do bedtime.
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    Finally get the kids put down
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    and I'll finally sit down on the couch and then
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    one of them will come back out of their rooms
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    and want to talk to me.
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    I snap and I just bark at them, "Why are you out of your room?
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    Get back in your room. Hey, I'm tired of you disobeying."
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    And they go back inside.
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    My nine year old Ben,
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    he probably gets the worst of it from me.
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    He's got this massive imagination
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    like he's always making stories and drawing.
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    He just gets lost in it, so much so that when you talk to him,
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    he can't even hear you, really,
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    like he's so engaged he can't even hear you.
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    Sarah says he's exactly like me, but here's the thing,
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    I've never had to deal with me before in life and
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    it turns out I'm very frustrating, very frustrating sometimes.
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    And so the other day, it was probably two weeks ago,
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    Ben was drawing something, you know, lost in his work.
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    And I forget what it was, I wanted him to do something.
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    And so I gave him the assignment,
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    "Ben, I need you to X, Y and Z."
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    And he just ignored me, just didn't do anything, just kept going.
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    And I just exploded, "Ben, I'm sick of this.
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    Hey, I'm talking to you.
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    You need to listen to me." And with tears in his eyes, my nine year
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    old son looked at me and he said, "Daddy, I just didn't hear you."
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    In that moment pride wanted to talk to me
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    and shame wanted to talk to me.
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    Pride wanted to say, "It's his fault.
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    It's not your fault. You're fine.
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    It is him. He needs to change."
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    And shame wanted to say, "You're a terrible dad.
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    You will always be an awful dad.
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    You have no shot.
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    Forget it. You're an awful dad.
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    You always will be." What do you do in that moment?
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    Who do you listen to?
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    God says something radically different,
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    if you choose to listen to him.
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    He says, "Kyle, listen to me.
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    Yes, you are weak, but your weakness
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    makes you a perfect candidate for My power
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    because do you know what I trade for weakness?
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    Power." Listen to 2 Corinthians 12:9:
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    God says the same thing to you,
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    that His grace is sufficient for you
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    and His power can be made perfect in your weakness.
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    Accepting your weakness defeats pride
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    and sets you up for transformation.
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    In the Captain America story it was little,
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    skinny Steve Rogers' willingness to accept that he was weak
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    that made him the perfect candidate for transformation.
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    It's the same with you.
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    This idea that weak people are the perfect candidates
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    for transformation is a dominant through line in scripture.
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    There's this one scene where Jesus goes to a party
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    and a party is filled full of people who know
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    beyond a shadow of a doubt that they are weak
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    because they're told it all the time by everybody else:
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    the tax collectors and the sinners.
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    And Jesus is at this party hanging out
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    when a group of religious leaders burst in the door.
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    And they come up to Jesus and they go, "Why are you here?
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    What makes you think these people
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    are worth you spending time with?"
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    And He said something critical to them.
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    He looked at them and said, "Guys, I didn't come for healthy people,
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    for people who think that they've got it all together.
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    I came for sick people, people who know they are weak
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    and in need of transformation."
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    And those guys looked at him, "oh, okay," and they walk out the door.
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    Now, spoiler alert, every single person Jesus ever met was weak,
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    but only those with the humility to admit it and accept it
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    ever received His transformation and power.
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    Are you willing to admit your weaknesses?
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    Really? Would your spouse agree?
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    What about your parents
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    or your kids or your friends?
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    Listen, I know it can be difficult to admit your weakness,
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    but it's critical.
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    It's critical because, listen, to weak people
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    God doesn't just say you are weak.
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    God says you are worthy.
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    And just like weakness defeats pride, worthiness defeats shame.
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    Shame focuses on what you have failed to do,
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    but worthiness focuses on God
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    and what He has succeeded in doing for you.
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    And what He's done for you is died for you.
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    Which means He said you are worthy of His life.
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    That's crazy.
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    And listen, it is not humility to disagree with God.
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    That's pride.
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    The most humble thing you can do is to agree with God
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    about what you're worth.
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    Now, in that Philippians verse that we read earlier,
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    after Jesus chooses to take the position of humility,
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    God transforms Him.
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    It says this:
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    God looked at Jesus, who chose to
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    make Himself weak,
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    and He said, "I'm so pleased with you,
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    I'm going to pour my power into you."
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    And the Bible says that same power is available
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    to transform you and me.
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    Literally the same; that's the word it uses.
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    Check out Ephesians 1:
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    The truth is, you are not just weak,
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    you are also worthy.
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    Worthy of God's presence and power
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    and blessing and anointing in your life.
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    - I'm so thankful for the reminder that
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    I am both weak and worthy.
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    And I love knowing the God's power is available to me.
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    Well, some of us may not be in a place to believe that just yet.
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    You can go to Crossroads.net/talk
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    to receive prayer and encouragement.
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    Well, when we practice spiritual disciplines
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    God meets us in powerful ways.
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    One of those disciplines is tithing.
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    If you would like to practice that right now,
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    or generosity, you can go to Crossroads.net/give.
  • 00:19:57
    In this next video, we get to see some real superheroes in action.
  • 00:20:01
    I'm so thankful for medical professionals.
  • 00:20:03
    And I'm so glad to be part of a church that is about action.
  • 00:20:08
    - Hey, I'm Justin, part of Crossroads staff here.
  • 00:20:10
    Today, we're packing our first 50 gratitude boxes
  • 00:20:14
    as a part of Operation Gratitude.
  • 00:20:16
    These boxes are filled with love and some laughter
  • 00:20:19
    and some nutrition and some energy
  • 00:20:21
    for medical workers who are on the frontlines.
  • 00:20:24
    And these boxes will go all over.
  • 00:20:25
    Wherever we have people in need,
  • 00:20:28
    we want to get these boxes out to them.
  • 00:20:29
    One of the things I love about our church is
  • 00:20:31
    that we jump into action.
  • 00:20:33
    So we asked some friends of ours who are in the medical field,
  • 00:20:36
    what do you need? What can you receive?
  • 00:20:38
    Then we added some Crossroads fun to it,
  • 00:20:40
    things like dart guns, water, putty, we put a joke book in there.
  • 00:20:43
    We just wanted them to know that we're behind them 100%,
  • 00:20:46
    so we put prayer cards,
  • 00:20:47
    some ways that they can receive encouragement.
  • 00:20:49
    We directed them to Crossroads.net/medical
  • 00:20:52
    so they could get their physical, spiritual, mental needs met
  • 00:20:56
    and to reminded them that we as a community
  • 00:20:58
    are there to care for them.
  • 00:21:00
    To everyone in the medical community, we see you.
  • 00:21:02
    We see your work and it matters to us.
  • 00:21:04
    Thank you for the work you're doing.
  • 00:21:11
    - Man, what a cool example of heroes
  • 00:21:12
    transforming the world around them.
  • 00:21:15
    When you replace the mindset of pride and shame
  • 00:21:20
    with what God says, that you are weak and worthy,
  • 00:21:24
    He will begin to transform you
  • 00:21:26
    into the superhero you are made to be.
  • 00:21:28
    After I flew off the handle at my son,
  • 00:21:30
    I didn't give into the voice of pride
  • 00:21:33
    that wanted me to believe it was his fault, not mine.
  • 00:21:35
    And I didn't listen to the voice of shame
  • 00:21:37
    that wanted me to believe that I'm doomed
  • 00:21:39
    and a hopeless, terrible dad forever.
  • 00:21:43
    Instead, I chose to agree with God who says
  • 00:21:48
    I am weak, but I am also worthy.
  • 00:21:52
    And in the moment I stopped and I asked God to transform me,
  • 00:21:56
    to give me the patience that I need
  • 00:21:58
    to become the superhero dad He's created me to be, and he is.
  • 00:22:04
    These last two months, I've seen God grow patience in me
  • 00:22:07
    more than ever before, and I'm far from done.
  • 00:22:10
    But He is transforming me into the superhero dad
  • 00:22:13
    I was always made to be and He'll do the same thing for you.
  • 00:22:18
    So when your wife points out that problem again
  • 00:22:22
    or your boss points out a mistake
  • 00:22:25
    or your friend gets frustrated for you continuing to flake out,
  • 00:22:28
    rather than go down the path of pride or shame,
  • 00:22:33
    instead, choose to agree with God
  • 00:22:35
    that you are weak, but you are worthy.
  • 00:22:38
    Because He is able to transform you
  • 00:22:41
    into the superhero you're created to be,
  • 00:22:45
    into a friend who shows up in the exact right moment,
  • 00:22:47
    a super heroic friend,
  • 00:22:50
    into a super heroic leader who is able to lead
  • 00:22:53
    through uncharted economic territories with confidence,
  • 00:22:57
    transform you into a super heroic dad
  • 00:23:01
    who loves his kids with patience and kindness,
  • 00:23:06
    who is able to transform you into
  • 00:23:08
    a super heroic son and daughter who make their Father proud.
  • 00:23:13
    He's able to do it.
  • 00:23:15
    Let me pray for you right now.
  • 00:23:17
    God, you are able to transform us,
  • 00:23:19
    to take us from wherever we are into the people
  • 00:23:21
    you've created us to be.
  • 00:23:22
    I'm asking that you would do that.
  • 00:23:24
    Would you take our weakness and our worthiness
  • 00:23:26
    and would You transform us?
  • 00:23:29
    Begin that right now.
  • 00:23:32
    Amen. Let's worship God, the God who is able.
  • 00:23:38
    - I love coming together like this.
  • 00:23:40
    My name is Robbie and I'm one of the folks
  • 00:23:42
    that gets lead worship around here.
  • 00:23:44
    We're going to spend some time singing together.
  • 00:23:47
    And so you may think, "Well, this is kind of the time
  • 00:23:49
    when I sort of like, go get a refill."
  • 00:23:51
    But I would love to invite you to stay engaged.
  • 00:23:54
    These songs help route us in our faith,
  • 00:23:57
    remind us of who God is and who we are because of Him.
  • 00:24:00
    And if you're a guitar player,
  • 00:24:01
    maybe you've got an old dusty guitar.
  • 00:24:03
    Go grab it and play along with us.
  • 00:24:05
    That's what those weird shapes are up in the corner,
  • 00:24:07
    they're guitar chords, so we'd love to have you join us now.
  • 00:31:36
    - May the Lord, my rock, be praised.
  • 00:31:39
    Who trains my hands for battle and my fingers for warfare.
  • 00:31:44
    He is my faithful love and my fortress.
  • 00:31:47
    My stronghold and my deliver.
  • 00:31:49
    He is my shield and I take refuge in Him.
  • 00:32:13
    Lord, what is man that You care for him?
  • 00:32:16
    The son, a man that you think of him?
  • 00:32:20
    Man is like breathe, his days are like passing shadows.
  • 00:32:24
    Lord, part Your heavens and come down,
  • 00:32:26
    touch the mountains and they will smoke.
  • 00:34:16
    - God, I'm grateful that we can come before You
  • 00:34:19
    and we can worship and we can engage with You
  • 00:34:21
    and You draw near.
  • 00:34:22
    You say You enthrone Yourself on the praise of your people.
  • 00:34:26
    And so thanks for drawing near to us
  • 00:34:27
    when we are scattered and connecting digitally.
  • 00:34:30
    Amen. Guys, thanks for worshiping with us.
  • 00:34:35
    It is great to connect in this way.
  • 00:34:38
    We would love to pray for you.
  • 00:34:39
    If you want to pray with a real life person through chatting,
  • 00:34:42
    you go to Crossroads.net right now
  • 00:34:45
    and we've got people waiting to pray with you.
  • 00:34:49
    Thanks for joining us.
  • 00:34:50
    And we'll see you all next week.
  • 00:34:51
    Have a great one.
  • 00:34:52
    Thank you so much for spending some time with us
  • 00:34:56
    today. I hope that you found it helpful.
  • 00:34:58
    Remember, you can go to Crossroads.net/talk to chat with us.
  • 00:35:01
    Well, next time we start a brand new series called Anchored
  • 00:35:05
    where we overturn some popular beliefs about Christianity
  • 00:35:08
    and really get to the bottom of what it means
  • 00:35:10
    to be a follower of Jesus.
  • 00:35:11
    Come back and join us.
  • 00:35:15
    - Life, it will test your resolve, man.
  • 00:35:19
    It will batter you with wave after wave,
  • 00:35:22
    but strength is forged in trial
  • 00:35:25
    and true faith, it anchors you.
Process, journal or discuss the themes of this article - here's a few questions to get the ball rolling...

Welcome to the Weekend Follow Up.

  1. Maybe now more than ever, we’re all wishing we had some super powers. If you could have any super power, or you just want to morph into your favorite superhero, what would it be and why?

  2. The world around us influences our minds— career, media, social life, government, education, and even church impact how we think. What’s an area in your life you want to be more of a superhero? What influences around you make it hard to believe you have that power?

  3. When it comes to a healthy mindset, pride and shame are our biggest villains. They either say we’re better than others (pride) or that we’re not enough (shame). Brainstorm some examples of how these shady characters can sneak up on you.

  4. Pride and shame don’t just hurt us, they also affect others we’re in relationship with. What’s one situation this week where that’s happened? Share with the group how you can choose humility, and lean into God’s power this week by connecting with that person to reconcile. Then do it.

  5. We can’t combat pride and shame on our own. We need God’s power, and we need to believe we are worthy of all that he has to give us. Read 2 Corinthians 12:9, then take turns praying a blessing like this over each person in the group. “God, thank you for __. I pray that you show them how worthy they are in your eyes this week. Amen.”

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May 16, 2020 35 mins 51 sec

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