How to Live in REAL Grace

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- Well, hey, welcome to Crossroads.

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Thank you so much for tuning in.

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Hey, my name is Andy.

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I'm the Crossroads Anywhere pastor,

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which is just the community of people

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gathering in all sorts of places all over the world.

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Now, here's what's about to happen today,

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so you know what to expect.

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And don't just hit that skip to message button.

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In a moment the band is going to lead us live in worship,

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and this is a time for us to lean in.

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So let that be a time where you actually

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get to experience God through this music.

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Turn up the volume, and if you're gathered

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with other people, worship together.

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During worship I'll be back after that to have a time for us

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to take communion together so you can actually

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go ahead and pause the video right now.

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Go grab crackers or bread or wine or juice,

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whatever you have available, and I'll guide us

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through doing that as a community online together.

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And then after worship, we're going to hear from

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one of our teaching pastors, Alli Patterson

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as we continue in our series, Leave Lies Behind.

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Hey, I'm so glad you're here.

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Let's worship together right now.

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- Can we learn a new song today?

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Then, all right. Can I teach this to you real quick?

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It was like this:

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- Now it's time for communion.

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So go ahead and grab your bread or wine

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or crackers and juice, whatever you have to take communion.

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And for me, this is the crackers that I had in my cupboard

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and looks like I stole this out of my kid's lunchbox.

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Whatever it is, this is an opportunity for us

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to do something physically and tactilely

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to remind us of God's goodness.

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And it's for us that are following Jesus.

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If you're not there yet, hey, that's totally, totally fine.

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For those of us that are taking communion,

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we can remember that Jesus gave His life

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in our place as the ultimate sacrifice,

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lived a perfect life, and died as forgiveness for our sins.

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In a time where bad news

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or division and evil can overwhelm us,

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this is a moment to stop and recognize

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the good news of what Jesus has done for us.

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1 Corinthians 11:23 puts it this way:

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The Lord Jesus, on the night He was betrayed,

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took bread, and when He'd given thanks,

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He broke it and said, "This is My body, which is for you.

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Do this in remembrance of Me."

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Take your bread or your cracker, and eat it

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as a reminder of God's body broken and given for you.

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Verse 25 continues: in the same way after supper

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He took the cup, saying,

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"This cup is the new covenant in My blood.

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Do this whenever you drink it, in remembrance of Me."

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This is a chance for us to drink our wine or our juice

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as a remembrance of God's blood, of Jesus blood shed for us.

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Let's drink that now.

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Father, would You just remind us of Your goodness,

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of the goodness that showed up with You

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living a perfect life and dying a gruesome death

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so that we could be healed, so that we could be freed,

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so that we could be restored.

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Thank You for the reminder of Your goodness to us

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this day and every day. Amen.

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As we reflect on Jesus's sacrifice,

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we want to use this moment

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to not just go through a tradition,

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but to turn our attention towards God

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as the Lord Most High because He is the only one who is worthy.

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So let the words of these songs guide our hearts

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and our minds in worship and gratitude.

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- We're going to sing this to You.

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You are the treasure I find.

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- Jesus, thank You.

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Thank You for showing us such a great love

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that You would die for us.

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Thank You for dying for me.

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There's nothing I could do to deserve Your love,

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but you give it to me freely. I'm so grateful.

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It's in Your Name we pray. Amen.

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Thanks for singing with us, you guys.

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You can go ahead and say hey to the person next to you.

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Grab a seat.

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- You need more fun in your life.

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Join us for the Super Bowl of Preaching.

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Service times and locations at crossroads.net.

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- One of my favorite weekends of the entire year

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is coming up right around the corner, Super Bowl Sunday.

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And a Crossroads, it's not just about football.

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Actually, it's really not about football at all.

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A bunch of years ago, we took the weekend

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when nobody went to church, that is Super Bowl Sunday,

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and turned it into an experience that became

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Now giving. worship, teaching, all of it is rooted

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Now we call it the Bible.

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And here's where we're going to be in it today.

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- Well, hey, everybody. My name is Alli.

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It's great to be with you this weekend.

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We have been talking about Grace

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to start off the year 2025,

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because it is the most foundational topic

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to a life following Jesus.

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So we've been looking at the gospel of grace.

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Some things that it is and some things that it isn't,

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and some of the fake versions of the gospel

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and of grace that are out in the world.

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And when we first started talking about this topic

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amongst the teachers that we're going to teach

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in this series, I said, "Oh, I already know

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what I want to talk about.

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I want to talk about this fake picture

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of what a real Christian is supposed to be."

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I feel like I've discovered over time

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that it feels like there's this box

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my life is supposed to fit into,

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and today I want to break us out of the box.

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So let me pray for us.

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Lord, I just ask that my words would be

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according to Your heart and Your character.

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And that right here, right now,

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in this simple way that we're gathered,

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that you would set people free.

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In Your Name we pray. Amen.

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Well, I started to discover this little box

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that I was supposed to fit into

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when people would ask me the very normal

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but dreaded question of what do you do?

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You know, you meet somebody new,

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maybe I met them in the gym

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or at a function at my kid's school

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and they're like, "Oh, hey, nice to meet you.

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So what do you do?"

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And I'm like, hmm.

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Yeah, if we could just put that off

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for another week or two because

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when I answer, I get some looks.

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"So wait, you teach at a church."

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You write books and Bible studies about Jesus?"

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"Yep. That's what I do."

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And they're like, hmm. Okay.

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And I see it, I see this, like, little box.

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I get the you're serious about Jesus box.

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And I've been filling this in over time.

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I can tell you what it looks like.

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Here's a few things that are definitely not in this box.

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Definitely nothing you do on the weekend happens in the box.

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So I probably don't go play pickleball

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and get beers with my friends like you do.

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I probably spend my weekend doing service projects

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from morning until night.

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If you're having a get together, I'm not invited,

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probably not invited because guess what I'm going to do?

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I'm going to wander the crowd asking you

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how your quiet time with Jesus was that morning.

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Just how was that for you?

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What did God say to you?

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You know that's not the party going guest

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that you really want.

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And I've just learned these reactions over time

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tell me there's this box.

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And as I walk away from people,

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they're probably wondering where my long denim skirt is, right?

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I mean, there's -- I did have a friend,

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we were talking about this and she said,

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"You know, they're kind of coming back in style."

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And I was like, "Is that right? I don't know."

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Not for me they're not, because it fits in the box.

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Right? This little box that my life is supposed to look like.

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And really, at the end of the day,

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people just end up apologizing for cussing around me.

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And I'm like, "You know what?

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You really don't have to do that.

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This little box that you want me to fit in,

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it doesn't have to feel that way."

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And even if you don't get

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the you're a teaching pastor box,

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you have probably picked up on the fact

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that there are expectations,

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there are things that people believe

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about what your life is supposed to look like,

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feel like, what your interests are,

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how you spend your free time.

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There's a box that gets constructed

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around what life is supposed to be like following Jesus.

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And this box doesn't, frankly, sound very good to me either.

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And so today I said I want to talk about

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how grace really works in a life,

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because I think the box got created

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because we've bought into a fake version of grace.

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We don't really totally understand

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how grace works in a life

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and so we just know we don't want it to look like that.

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And so today, all I want to do is go,

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"Hey, Grace goes to work in every life,

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every single life, but it doesn't look like that."

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Grace does start to work in your life, though,

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from the moment that you hear the gospel

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and you receive the gospel for yourself.

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When I say the gospel, I just really simply mean

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when you come to a belief that Jesus

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was the Son of God made man

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who lived a life that was perfect

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and died on the cross in your place for your sin,

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and then rose from the dead,

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and that you're invited to start that life with Him

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that will last forever right now.

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That is the Gospel. That's the Good News.

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And the moment that you say, "Yes, that's for me,"

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then grace begins to work in your life

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in a brand new way.

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Now, if you're not there,

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and I know that we have many people

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who come to Crossroads, and I'm delighted,

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and I want to say this message you might like even more,

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because I think that you're going to hear

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some of the hesitations that maybe you have

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in handing your life over to Jesus,

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because you don't want to end up in the box.

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I think this box got created because

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there's a fake version of how our life begins to change,

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but it does begin to change. So what is that?

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The Bible calls that process of change something,

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and the word the Bible uses for it is sanctification.

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To be sanctified means to grow more and more

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and more over time to look like Jesus.

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It's the process of becoming, take a deep breath, Holy.

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The process of becoming holy.

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Now that's really what it means to look more like Jesus

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because the one word that the Bible uses

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over and over and over, from beginning to end,

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to summarize all that makes God God is holy.

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And so if we're in this process of change

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that makes us more like Him over time,

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that means we are in the process of becoming more holy,

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or at least we could be, right? We could be.

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1 Peter 1 says this really, really clearly.

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It says that God wants our lives to be holy.

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It says:

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We are called to become more like God over time.

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That's the process that our life is supposed to be in

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when we begin to follow Jesus.

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But it sounds impossible, right?

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It sounds a little scary.

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And we have this gut instinct that we are not holy.

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And I think that's a good one.

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Like, you know, we are not God,

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and holiness is all that makes God God.

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And what do you mean I'm in the process of becoming holy?

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That doesn't even make any sense.

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But 2 Timothy helps us out a little bit with how.

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What's going on there?

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What happens in a life when God gets ahold of it?

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2 Timothy 1:9-10 says:

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Grace. In 2 Timothy, Paul writes

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it's grace that powers the change.

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It's grace that puts you on this trajectory

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to becoming more like Him.

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But the problem is there's two different versions

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of how this works, and one of them has produced the box.

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And I want to offer you today that

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that is a fake version of Grace,

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that the way that we think grace works in our life,

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if it's anything like that, is actually

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the false, fake, empty religious version of grace.

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It's not true.

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There's a real grace that's very, very different.

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But fake grace actually offers you

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not only this very small, but very pretty box

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to fit your life in, it actually gives you

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some things to help you change.

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Are you ready for this?

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The first and most important thing that fake Grace gives you

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is a get out of hell free card.

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I'll take it. I mean, get out of hell free.

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I mean, sounds pretty good, but you know what?

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Just tuck that in your pocket for later.

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You're going to need that later. Don't lose it.

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Put it in your pocket. Keep hold of that thing.

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But for now, there's a checklist.

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I'm going to download the checklist.

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I'm going to hand it out.

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But don't don't lose the card. That's the good stuff.

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But later on you're going to need that.

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Right now what you're going to really, really need

00:31:59

is you're going to need the checklist.

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You're going to need to get to work.

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And there's a picture of how a Christian is supposed to look.

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And what's going to happen in your life now

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is we're going to start working the bullet points.

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We're going to go first stop this, then do that.

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Get rid of these friends, pick up those,

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get rid of that interest.

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And apparently over time, our lives get

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very much the same and very, very small.

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And this is the reaction that I feel like

00:32:26

I would get when I would say, you know,

00:32:28

it's just so obvious with me, right?

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It's not as obvious with you.

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Like, you don't have to have to tell everybody you meet

00:32:33

that you work at a church.

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But if you did, if you told them you followed Jesus,

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you would find that version of the box.

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If that is anything like what you grew up hearing,

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what you thought of Christianity,

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what you thought Jesus wanted out of your life,

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any version of that, any version of that at all,

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you need real grace to go to work in your life.

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And my hope is that you will want

00:33:02

the work of Jesus in your life.

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Because when grace, real grace, gets ahold of you,

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there's good things that happen.

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Your life becomes lighter, more expansive,

00:33:15

more beautiful over time.

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But we don't have that picture of change.

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We don't have that picture in our mind

00:33:21

of what Jesus does when He begins to work in our life.

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And I hope you believe that a little bit more today.

00:33:29

I want you to feel it.

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I want you to close your eyes for a minute.

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Humor me. Close your eyes. Actually do it.

00:33:38

I'm going to read you some words

00:33:40

from a conversational translation of Matthew 11:28-30,

00:33:46

and it's because I feel like you can feel the difference.

00:33:52

Are you tired? Worn out, burned out on religion?

00:34:00

Come to Me. Get away with Me and you'll recover your life.

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I'll show you how to take a real rest.

00:34:07

Walk with Me and work with Me.

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Watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.

00:34:16

I won't lay anything heavy or ill fitting on you.

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Keep company with Me,

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and you'll learn to live freely and lightly.

00:34:29

Those were the words of Jesus.

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That was the translation of what He said to His followers

00:34:35

when He invited them in to a brand new way of life,

00:34:39

a life that was powered by real grace.

00:34:42

It feels nothing like, nothing like this fake version

00:34:46

where we go, "You know, someday I'm going to

00:34:48

get out of hell, but right now I need to

00:34:49

put a smile on my face because, you know,

00:34:52

small price to pay, you sinner. Just get to work."

00:34:57

It feels nothing like that.

00:35:00

And way too few of us ever discover how real grace works

00:35:04

because we withhold ourselves from Jesus because of this.

00:35:07

We don't actually want Him to get ahold of our life,

00:35:09

because who wants that?

00:35:11

Who wants to get smaller and more standardized

00:35:14

and, you know, more oppressed?

00:35:17

You want the life that those verses promise, right?

00:35:22

If there's one thing I know about us

00:35:24

collectively as a culture, as a community,

00:35:27

as individuals, we are tired. We're worn out.

00:35:31

We're exhausted. We're anxious.

00:35:33

And Jesus speaks right to that with His invitation

00:35:37

to a life of real grace.

00:35:39

There's three things I want you to know

00:35:41

about how real grace works that I hope

00:35:44

completely change your understanding of what happens

00:35:46

to a life when Jesus gets ahold of it

00:35:49

and makes you want to give yours to Him

00:35:52

maybe a little bit more.

00:35:54

See, real grace comes through Him, it comes through a person.

00:35:58

Real grace comes to us through a person.

00:36:00

It's actually the presence of Jesus Himself.

00:36:03

He offers a relationship.

00:36:05

That's what those words mean.

00:36:07

"Come to Me. Get away with Me.

00:36:10

Keep company with Me," He said, "Walk with me."

00:36:16

This is an invite to know someone,

00:36:18

not orders and a progress report. That's a boss, right?

00:36:23

Show up at a meeting.

00:36:24

Tell them how them how you're doing.

00:36:25

Hit the bullet points. Walk out the door.

00:36:27

Wait for your raise. You know, this is --

00:36:29

That's a boss relationship.

00:36:31

What Jesus is offering in those words

00:36:33

is a relationship that's much more familial, much warmer.

00:36:37

It's an older brother, a best friend, a father figure

00:36:40

that you can walk with and work with, He said.

00:36:45

And He recognizes where we're beginning.

00:36:47

He recognizes we're coming to Him, when we encounter Him,

00:36:51

really, any of us, we're exhausted in some way.

00:36:55

We're burned out, and we're definitely tired

00:36:58

of the religious box that we were told we should fit in.

00:37:01

And that's what He wants us to walk away from.

00:37:04

He's like, "Yeah, I don't really like that either.

00:37:06

I didn't even make that box, so you can just

00:37:09

jump right on out," into a life that, you know,

00:37:12

it's not that it's without work because He said,

00:37:15

"Come to work with Me, walk with Me, learn My rhythms."

00:37:19

There's a there is discipline and work

00:37:21

and things like that that occur as we follow Him,

00:37:23

and even very difficult things sometimes.

00:37:26

But the way that it's occurring makes us lighter,

00:37:29

gives us life back, even down a path that includes

00:37:34

tough stuff sometimes and work and rhythms

00:37:37

and learning new ways and things

00:37:38

that don't always come naturally to us.

00:37:41

We begin to get that, like, "Oh, this is actually

00:37:44

going to be better."

00:37:48

And frankly, I'm really not sure we always believe that.

00:37:51

And I really -- I'm trying and I want you to try with me

00:37:55

to hand over all the parts of my life to Him,

00:37:58

because I'm not sure we're fully convinced

00:38:01

of the truth of that invitation yet.

00:38:04

What if you began to think, as of today,

00:38:08

about grace with a capital G?

00:38:11

What if grace was a name?

00:38:13

And what if you could put it in the place

00:38:16

of the name Jesus?

00:38:18

Romans 6 Paul actually talks a lot about

00:38:21

in about in Romans 5-8, what happens to the life

00:38:23

of a believer when you actually receive the gospel.

00:38:26

He talks all about it in those few chapters of Romans.

00:38:29

And one thing he says in the middle of that

00:38:31

gets us really close to this idea. He says:

00:38:44

Grace is the name of your new master.

00:38:49

You had an old one, and he had territory,

00:38:51

and he had a kingdom, and he had some power,

00:38:53

and his name was sin.

00:38:55

And then you begin a life with Jesus,

00:38:57

and you have a new one,

00:38:59

and his name is Grace with a capital G.

00:39:01

And He also has a kingdom, and He also has some power,

00:39:04

and He also wants some things from you,

00:39:06

but they're nothing like the other one.

00:39:10

What if you did that flip flop in your mind

00:39:13

and you capitalized G, and you realize that

00:39:15

grace is an invitation into a connection with Him?

00:39:22

And the second thing this means for our life,

00:39:24

second thing about how He works with us over time

00:39:27

to make us more like Him is the place that He starts.

00:39:30

And this is super important.

00:39:33

He underscored this multiple times

00:39:35

in some scathing words, frankly,

00:39:37

that I'm going to read to you in just a second.

00:39:39

Real grace always works from the inside out.

00:39:45

Real grace goes inside first.

00:39:47

Real grace never begins on the outside.

00:39:50

Now it reminds me of my -- what fake grace tells us

00:39:54

reminds me of my favorite household chore.

00:39:56

Anybody else like to power wash things?

00:39:59

I am not kidding. It's so satisfying, right?

00:40:02

All you power washers out there unite,

00:40:04

because, I mean, I'll get out there with the power washer

00:40:07

and I'm like, "What else needs power washed?"

00:40:09

You know, we have a fence and there's a lot of trees

00:40:11

that hang over one part of it,

00:40:13

and it always gets the green algae stuff

00:40:15

growing on it over time.

00:40:16

And I'm just, [motor sound] You know?

00:40:18

And it looks as good as new.

00:40:19

But you know what happens about three, four weeks later,

00:40:24

the algae is back.

00:40:26

I mean, I don't mind because I like the power washing,

00:40:28

but it always comes back.

00:40:31

And fake grace tells us, "Just get get in line

00:40:34

for your scrub down.

00:40:36

You're just going to blow that dirt off the outside.

00:40:39

It's going to be great.

00:40:40

You're going to look great.

00:40:42

And frankly, everybody's going to be absolutely sure

00:40:47

that you're following Jesus because we're just going to,

00:40:49

we're going to clean that life right up."

00:40:51

It's not a bad analogy for how fake grace tells us it works.

00:40:55

But Jesus says real grace begins on the inside

00:40:59

where you can't see it for a while.

00:41:02

And frankly, it doesn't maybe even convince anybody

00:41:05

for a hot minute. Listen.

00:41:06

Jesus criticized Pharisees harshly

00:41:10

for keeping their focus on the external things

00:41:14

of a life of faith.

00:41:15

Listen to Him just absolutely rail against this idea

00:41:20

in Matthew 23. He says, Jesus says this

00:41:23

directly to the Pharisees and the teachers of the law.

00:42:11

I could have read you one of those and made the point,

00:42:15

but I purposely read you both things in a row,

00:42:18

which He says to them right in a row,

00:42:21

because He was coming strongly against this idea

00:42:25

that the most important thing was

00:42:27

whatever was taking place on the outside of your life.

00:42:31

He called them whitewashed tombs.

00:42:32

That would have been like a -- that's like

00:42:34

an ancient Jewish rabbi insult, you know what I'm saying?

00:42:37

Like He was like, "You're a whitewashed tomb."

00:42:40

Whitewashed tomb was a very offensive idea to a Pharisee,

00:42:47

because they spent their lives focused

00:42:50

on staying clean according to the law.

00:42:53

And a tomb held dead bodies

00:42:54

and dead bodies were the height of unclean.

00:43:00

And Jesus said, "All your external focus,

00:43:03

all the things you're power washing,

00:43:05

everything that you're trying to do on the outside,

00:43:08

guess what you managed to do? The exact opposite."

00:43:14

It wasn't that those things were neutral,

00:43:16

it's that those things totally backfired.

00:43:19

They completely backfired into a person

00:43:22

that was actually devoid of anything godly.

00:43:25

This is the most severe kind of words that Jesus spoke

00:43:30

to them, because He was like,

00:43:31

"You are the leaders of the people,

00:43:33

and how dare you lead them to a faith

00:43:36

that is only on the outside?"

00:43:37

Because real grace, the real work of God,

00:43:41

starts on the inside of a life,

00:43:43

on the inside of a heart,

00:43:45

on the inside of your motives,

00:43:47

on the inside of your life in ways that

00:43:50

a lot of times people can't see.

00:43:53

So we don't like it, right?

00:43:55

We don't like it for ourselves because

00:43:57

we want people to know, "I'm decent, I'm good.

00:44:00

Like, it's all good, I follow Jesus." You know?

00:44:03

And we definitely don't look at each other like this.

00:44:08

We don't want to believe in each other's change

00:44:10

unless we can see it on the outside.

00:44:11

Now, just to be clear, Jesus did give a metaphor

00:44:16

for how your life grows over time

00:44:19

and how you can see it on the outside.

00:44:22

But that metaphor was fruit.

00:44:26

Think about how different that feels than power washing.

00:44:32

What kind of conditions, what kind of process,

00:44:35

what kind of timing, and the wide variety of fruit available.

00:44:41

There's so many different things

00:44:43

that Jesus can grow in our life

00:44:44

that will eventually become visible on the outside.

00:44:51

Too many Christians, too many churches,

00:44:53

too many people who claim to love Jesus

00:44:55

just present the pretty box.

00:45:00

And a glimpse inside

00:45:01

actually makes you want to run away, right?

00:45:03

I felt this way a little bit when we went to,

00:45:06

don't hate me, all you Disney lovers,

00:45:08

when I went to Universal Studios.

00:45:10

I'm about to tell you a story

00:45:12

I need you just take a deep breath

00:45:13

if you love Disney World and all the Disney things.

00:45:16

Because I had like an existential level meltdown

00:45:19

on the Doctor Seuss ride in Universal Studios.

00:45:22

Now, this was a handful of years ago.

00:45:23

My kids were younger.

00:45:25

We'd never done any of the Disney things.

00:45:27

And so we're like, "Okay, we're going to do it."

00:45:30

One of my kids loved Harry Potter, so we're like,

00:45:33

"Okay, fine, we'll do it."

00:45:35

Now, I was probably not in the best place

00:45:37

when this little meltdown took place. I didn't --

00:45:40

Know I was already on edge, let's say, because,

00:45:43

it was during the era where we were still required

00:45:46

to wear masks all over the parks on the outside.

00:45:49

So I wasn't doing very well.

00:45:51

I actually wanted to punch the next person

00:45:53

in Mickey ears who told me to pull up my mask.

00:45:56

So that's kind of where I was.

00:45:58

And we just decided, you know, "We're going to --

00:46:00

We're going to take a little break.

00:46:02

We're going to jump on the Doctor Seuss ride."

00:46:03

It's really not a big deal.

00:46:04

Seems more like a tram than a ride.

00:46:06

You know, one of those.

00:46:07

So we take our water bottles, we get on the ride.

00:46:09

And the ride kind of rises up a little bit.

00:46:12

Not up in the air like a tram, just a little rise to the ride.

00:46:16

Just enough that I could see out over the park

00:46:20

and beyond into the parking lots.

00:46:23

And when I say parking lots, I need you to visualize

00:46:25

like 18 miles of parking lots.

00:46:30

And so I'm like, "Oh wow, that's a lot of parking lots."

00:46:33

And I look beyond that and there was, like,

00:46:36

a five tier highway system happening just beyond that.

00:46:40

Orlando, apparently in this corner,

00:46:43

had a massive, multi-tiered highway system.

00:46:46

And all of a sudden I'm like, "What am I doing?

00:46:51

I'm sitting in a pink piece of plastic

00:46:53

in the middle of a concrete parking lot.

00:46:56

Why did I pay thousands of dollars for this?"

00:46:59

And my kids are like, "Whoa, mom's upset."

00:47:01

You know? They're they're doing one of these to Bill.

00:47:04

And my husband's, like, he loves by, like, serving.

00:47:09

So he's like, "What? What can I do?

00:47:12

What do you want? What?"

00:47:13

And I'm like, "I don't want anything

00:47:15

except a plane out of here. Look at this.

00:47:17

What are we doing? We've, like, spent all our savings

00:47:19

to ride around in some teacup in the middle of a parking lot."

00:47:23

Like, I just completely lost my mind.

00:47:25

And I'm like, I'm a pretty -- I'm a pretty steady person,

00:47:30

all evidence to the contrary.

00:47:32

But, I mean, this was, like, full blown meltdown.

00:47:37

And I just want to say, I think this is, like,

00:47:40

an appropriate reaction when we get a glimpse

00:47:44

of something that is totally fake.

00:47:48

Now, I know some of you Disney lovers are, like,

00:47:50

"It's not fake, it's wonderful."

00:47:52

And there's this and this and all these things.

00:47:53

I believe you. I know Disney lovers too.

00:47:56

Just go with me here.

00:47:57

When we get a glimpse of something that feels

00:48:01

completely empty, like we've been duped,

00:48:04

like we paid too much for this thing

00:48:07

that ended up being nothing like we wanted.

00:48:11

If you're somebody who ended up here because

00:48:13

that's how you felt about your experience

00:48:17

with other Christians or other churches,

00:48:19

I just want to say I hope and pray that this place

00:48:24

never presents you with that picture of Jesus,

00:48:27

never presents you with that picture

00:48:29

of what a life that follows Him is like.

00:48:32

Because the very last thing that I ever want to be

00:48:36

is some picture that ends up being

00:48:38

a false, empty, fake box that people run away from.

00:48:43

And I just want to say, I think Jesus would support

00:48:46

that reaction, He didn't like it either.

00:48:50

He was having a meltdown too, a much more holy one,

00:48:53

but you know what I mean.

00:48:55

He's like, "No, I'm out.

00:48:58

This is not how my grace works."

00:49:03

The best people in my story are who I want all of us to be.

00:49:07

I want to be somebody that makes room

00:49:10

for grace to start working, and doesn't demand

00:49:13

the external evidence of bullet points and checklists

00:49:17

before the fruit has a chance to grow.

00:49:21

Real grace gives that opportunity.

00:49:23

It starts in hidden places.

00:49:24

It works for a long time.

00:49:26

It grows over time in a process that, yes,

00:49:30

eventually grows fruit, but does not end up a whitewashed tomb.

00:49:37

See, real grace doesn't mind hidden starting points.

00:49:43

Real grace actually doesn't mind any starting point.

00:49:47

The third way that real grace works in our lives

00:49:53

is by personal knowledge.

00:49:55

Real grace knows us, like, knows us knows us.

00:49:59

Inside and out knows where you've been,

00:50:02

knows what your hurts are, knows what your joy is,

00:50:06

knows what you love about your life,

00:50:08

knows what you hate about your life,

00:50:09

knows everything about where your life is going

00:50:13

and where He wants to take you.

00:50:15

Grace knows you and doesn't work through

00:50:19

a corporate checklist that He's working on over time.

00:50:29

You know, when I make lists is -- I am a list maker.

00:50:32

Anybody else love to make the lists?

00:50:35

I, back in the day, pre-Enneagram.

00:50:37

I know we all love the Enneagram now. Whatever.

00:50:39

I've actually never taken the whole thing,

00:50:41

but back in the day, I took the Myers-Briggs.

00:50:44

Did anyone else take the Myers-Briggs?

00:50:46

I'm a strong J, so I love a good list.

00:50:48

I like closure. I like finality to things.

00:50:53

I've even gotten out of bed to cross things off of a list.

00:50:55

If you're a J, you know exactly what I'm talking about.

00:50:57

So I love a good list.

00:50:59

But do you know when I make lists

00:51:01

is I make lists because I'm afraid I'll forget.

00:51:05

I make lists because I need to do something

00:51:07

at an exact moment, or I need to finish it

00:51:09

at a certain time or on a certain day.

00:51:12

I make lists because I don't want to let other people down.

00:51:14

I make lists because it's the way

00:51:15

that I keep myself organized. And guess what?

00:51:18

That works great for school or work or home.

00:51:21

It doesn't work great for our spiritual life.

00:51:27

Jesus doesn't work like that.

00:51:30

And the reason He doesn't work like that

00:51:32

is because He knows you.

00:51:35

Those verses I read you say

00:51:36

I'm not going to lay anything ill fitting on you.

00:51:39

I'm not going to lay anything that doesn't fit you,

00:51:43

it doesn't fit your life, doesn't fit your experience

00:51:45

because He knows who you are and where He wants to take you.

00:51:51

But we're very uncomfortable with this personal working.

00:51:54

We just want to know, like,

00:51:55

where are we going next with this?

00:51:57

And what are you going to do in his life?

00:51:59

And how do I know if this is right?

00:52:00

It all is one big invitation into a life with Him

00:52:06

where frankly, we don't get those answers

00:52:08

up front all the time.

00:52:10

It's a walk with grace Himself.

00:52:14

I want to share just a tiny clip of a video with you.

00:52:17

And I have this video for a very specific reason.

00:52:20

Um, this video is of an architect

00:52:23

who's actually a part of our community,

00:52:25

and also a friend of mine.

00:52:27

And I went to interview him for a project

00:52:30

that I've just completed.

00:52:32

Now, that project was for a video study

00:52:36

of my brand new book.

00:52:38

It actually just came out this week. Super exciting.

00:52:41

And the book name is called Blueprint for Belonging.

00:52:44

And I originally wanted to talk to Kurt, is his name,

00:52:47

because he's an architect.

00:52:48

And I wanted to ask him some questions for the study

00:52:51

about blueprints and design

00:52:54

and how we build things using blueprints.

00:52:57

And as I was talking to him,

00:52:59

he said some interesting things for us.

00:53:02

Now, quick note, if you want to join up

00:53:05

with the book study that you're about to see

00:53:06

a tiny little clip of, you can totally still do that.

00:53:10

It doesn't start for another little while.

00:53:11

You can go to Crossroads.net/women.

00:53:13

There's already over 1100 women signed up all over

00:53:17

our community online, offline, in person, by yourself.

00:53:20

You can do it any way you want. You're welcome to join.

00:53:23

I would love to have you.

00:53:24

But that's why this video exists.

00:53:26

You're going to see the extensive conversation with Kurt

00:53:30

related to the book in week two of that study.

00:53:32

But I wanted to share a little tiny bit of it here.

00:53:36

And I want you to put on a very specific mindset.

00:53:39

Now, the conversation takes place

00:53:42

inside of our communities building called The George.

00:53:45

And it's a burned out old Catholic church

00:53:48

that we've renovated.

00:53:50

And Kurt was the lead architect on the team

00:53:54

that did this historical renovation.

00:53:56

It's a beautiful space if you've never been in the building.

00:53:59

And so we're actually sitting in that space,

00:54:02

and Kurt started talking about what it was like

00:54:05

to try to figure out what are you going to keep

00:54:08

and what are you going to take away,

00:54:09

and how do you do this in an old space?

00:54:12

And I want you to listen and consider the fact

00:54:14

that you, your life, as you begin to follow Jesus

00:54:19

is not a new build.

00:54:20

It's actually a historical renovation.

00:54:23

Now listen to what Kurt says with that mindset.

00:54:26

- It's interesting because some of

00:54:29

the most sort of catastrophic things that we discover

00:54:34

sometimes become the most beautiful things in the end.

00:54:38

We leveraged them to the good. It's --

00:54:41

- Yeah.

00:54:42

- And so, I mean, just like we're sitting in this space

00:54:46

and everything above 20ft has cracks and peeling plaster.

00:54:52

It's ruinous. It's a ruin.

00:54:55

It's like going to Rome and walking around ruins.

00:54:59

And to put your hands on a ruinous structure is beautiful.

00:55:04

There's something really magical

00:55:07

and beyond explanation and beyond time.

00:55:11

And that's what's going on here.

00:55:12

That was -- That's the gem of this building.

00:55:17

- In that space he mentioned from 20ft up.

00:55:21

What they ended up doing in that space was 20ft up,

00:55:24

he told me they just sealed it, cracks and all.

00:55:29

And 20ft down is completely fitted

00:55:34

for a modern digital space where you could do

00:55:38

anything you could do in any of our other buildings.

00:55:42

And as I thought about that, as I listened to him talk,

00:55:45

I couldn't help but think,

00:55:47

this is exactly what real grace does.

00:55:50

Real grace knows what you're going to need for the future.

00:55:53

Real grace knows the parts of you

00:55:54

that need outfitted for the future,

00:55:56

that need brought forward, that need some new technology.

00:55:59

And grace also knows what parts of your story,

00:56:03

your past, your pain, your mistakes,

00:56:07

your cracks need sealed in and just kept.

00:56:11

Because ruins are beautiful. They're beautiful.

00:56:15

He said when you get to put your hands on a ruin,

00:56:18

what did he say? "It's magical."

00:56:20

There's something amazing about it.

00:56:21

And, friends, this is how real grace works.

00:56:24

Real grace is not looking to drywall everything

00:56:27

and have you move on and look shiny and bright and new.

00:56:30

Real grace makes beautiful ruins.

00:56:33

That's the work of real grace in anyone's life.

00:56:36

I got an email from a man who did not understand this

00:56:40

about a year ago, and he said to me in this email.

00:56:44

He said, "Hey, I don't --" By the way,

00:56:47

I do not know if he was part of our community or not.

00:56:50

It actually came through my website, so I have no idea.

00:56:52

Was this person at Crossroads or not? No clue.

00:56:55

But he said to me, "You need to stop telling your story.

00:57:00

It's shameful.

00:57:05

And you need to shut up about it.

00:57:08

And if you want to help Jesus at all,

00:57:10

if you want to work in the Kingdom at all,

00:57:12

just let people see who you are now."

00:57:16

And for just a second, a second, I was really tempted

00:57:20

to buy into the story of fake grace,

00:57:23

that the best thing about your life

00:57:25

is when everything gets drywalled and painted

00:57:27

and looks shiny and new again.

00:57:28

And the truth is, he's the one that bought into

00:57:32

a fake version of grace.

00:57:33

Because I know, I know that what real grace does

00:57:37

is it seals in cracks and somehow, some way,

00:57:40

at the end of the day, it ends up beautiful

00:57:43

and perfectly able to walk into the future,

00:57:46

perfectly able.

00:57:48

And that's the work of Jesus in your life and my life.

00:57:52

Somehow, nothing in our past thwarts Him

00:57:54

from making it beautiful again.

00:57:56

And this doesn't mean that He's not going to

00:57:59

go to work on some stuff, right?

00:58:01

If you read the entirety of the New Testament,

00:58:04

you understand Jesus is after holiness.

00:58:08

And that is going to implicate everything in your life.

00:58:10

It's going to implicate absolutely everything.

00:58:12

And He cares about all of it.

00:58:13

He cares about how you talk to your kids.

00:58:15

He cares about whether you cheat in school.

00:58:17

He cares about how you pay your taxes.

00:58:19

He cares about what you -- who you sleep with.

00:58:21

He cares about what you put in your mouth.

00:58:23

He cares about what job you have.

00:58:24

All of those things are going to be implicated

00:58:28

on the path of holiness that He wants to put you on.

00:58:31

But I got to tell you, He knows you well enough

00:58:34

to know it's your path.

00:58:36

He knows what He's doing with you.

00:58:38

He knows what your gifts are.

00:58:39

He knows what future you need.

00:58:40

He knows exactly which cracks

00:58:43

are going to make your ruins beautiful.

00:58:45

And He knows exactly what your life is here to do.

00:58:49

That is the power of walking with real grace. Real grace.

00:58:55

The call on your life is high.

00:58:57

It's a call to holiness.

00:58:59

My goodness. Is there a loftier call?

00:59:02

But I got to remind you today,

00:59:03

you're not called to the checklist.

00:59:05

You are not called to the Good Mom Checklist.

00:59:08

You are called to be holy.

00:59:09

You are not called to a quiet time every single day at 6 a.m.

00:59:13

You are called to be holy.

00:59:15

You are not called to be a nonsmoker.

00:59:17

You're called to be holy.

00:59:19

And Jesus is the one who knows exactly the steps

00:59:23

on exactly the path to bring you, over time

00:59:26

to look more and more like Him

00:59:28

and have a life of fruitfulness.

00:59:30

And that is the life of real grace.

00:59:33

We got to get rid of this box.

00:59:36

Man, it is just killing us. It is killing us.

00:59:38

And it's keeping us from handing over

00:59:41

all the parts of our life to Jesus

00:59:44

and letting Him do His work.

00:59:46

I just want you to hear His invitation in Matthew 11

00:59:48

one more time, He says, "Come to Me. Walk with Me.

00:59:53

Keep company with Me.

00:59:56

I'll show you how to do it.

00:59:58

Learn the unforced rhythms of grace."

01:00:04

The good news is that you have access to

01:00:05

the power of grace to live a holy life.

01:00:09

That's the good news. That is amazing news.

01:00:13

But we got to stop the scrub down.

01:00:15

We got to get rid of the checklist.

01:00:17

Got to believe that He can actually do that work

01:00:20

in a way that frees you, in a way that

01:00:22

you recover your life instead of losing it.

01:00:26

I want to invite you to stand if you just want

01:00:29

a very simple blessing of that grace.

01:00:31

I want to end with a couple of words from the Apostle Paul.

01:00:35

Will you join me, if you want to stand up.

01:00:36

Wherever you are, if you're in this room,

01:00:38

if you're online, you can stand up in a coffee shop.

01:00:41

You can stand up in your living room.

01:00:43

Maybe if you're listening in the car, don't stand up there.

01:00:46

Everywhere else you can stand up.

01:00:50

And the Apostle Paul wrote over and over

01:00:52

the same words in many of his letters.

01:00:55

And I'm going to take it straight out of the letter

01:00:57

that he wrote to the Romans. And he said:

01:01:03

To all you who are loved by God

01:01:07

and called to be holy, grace to you.

01:01:13

Grace to you. Grace to you. Amen? Amen.

01:01:22

- Hey, if something moved you or resonated with you

01:01:24

today in the week's message, we don't want it to end

01:01:26

with just watching something.

01:01:28

We'd actually love to

01:01:29

and be honored to pray with you about it.

01:01:31

It's as easy as heading to Crossroads.net

01:01:33

and clicking on the chat button,

01:01:34

and one of our team members would love

01:01:36

to pray with you and chat with you.

01:01:38

If you'd like to get involved in the community here,

01:01:40

which is amazing, one of the easiest ways

01:01:42

you can do that is just text the word Anywhere to 301301,

01:01:45

and part of my team will reach out to you,

01:01:47

connect with you personally.

01:01:49

Now, we don't want this to just be content to consume.

01:01:51

We really want to get to know you

01:01:53

and help you fully engage and grow as a part of the church.

01:01:56

As always, hey, thanks for joining us online.

01:01:58

We'll see you back here next week.

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