In Defense Of The Dad Bod

Brian Tome

4 mins

This time of year, everyone wants to talk about resolutions.

Part of me likes this, because it means people are taking a look at their life and making aggressive moves to change. Unfortunately, few of us stick with it long enough to make a difference. This kind of forward thinking tends to die around the same time the majority of resolutions do—according to researchers, that’s by the end of the first week for 23% of people, and by the end of the month for 64%.

I’m not necessarily pro- or anti-resolution. But I will always throw my weight behind adding, or deleting, things from my life in order to be constantly moving and improving. We have a baked-in opportunity to do it in January, but it needs to continue February through December. Wisdom is learning to take stock of your life in regular intervals, and making adjustments along the way. The problem is so few of us actually do it.

When it comes to resolutions, the vast majority of people don’t even bother in January, let alone the rest of the year.


I find it hard to believe that 62% of people don’t see anything that needs to change in their life. Wouldn’t we all love to be healthier, more financially secure, or have higher resilience? Instead, that statistic suggests to me that the vast majority of people feel powerless to do anything about changing their lives. Doing nothing and failing is easier to stomach than putting in the effort and falling short. So the majority sits safely on the sidelines while the patterns in their life keep repeating over and over again.

Of the 38% of people who are pursuing change in their lives, the top five resolutions are:


There’s nothing wrong with any of those pursuits, and if you find yourself chasing one, I hope you commit and push through the difficulty to achieve it. To me, though, this list has a glaring omission: improving spiritual vitality.

Fear of developing a dad bod might drive us to the gym in January, but very few of us even consider what it takes to grow in resiliency, generosity, kindness, or patience.

These are spiritual muscles, and they grow the same way our physical ones do—by working them out.

I hit the gym multiple times a week, and understand the importance of taking care of my body. But spiritual fitness trumps physical fitness every time. I know too many people who can run an impressive 5K, lift more than their body weight, or finish a Peloton session without taking a break, but don’t know how to find joy in their everyday life, lose their sense of peace with every news update, or won’t make time for friends and fun. This is a bigger problem than a few extra pounds around the gut.

This year, I am inviting you to join me as we develop our spiritual fitness together, using a one-of-a-kind app built by many of my friends and colleagues. The Crossroads Anywhere App is part of my daily spiritual fitness regimen. Along with thousands of others, I use it to read scripture, journal my thoughts on it, share prayer requests, pray for others, and practice gratitude. You can also use it to connect to a massive library of content, including my podcast, articles, and video series.

I’m starting a 30-Day Bible Reading Challenge through the ancient biblical book of Nehemiah. It’s a story of resilience, tenacity, and overcoming—things we could all use in 2024. Download the free app and join me. If you’re a first time downloader, you’ll be prompted to follow me so you won’t miss any of my journals.

Commit to growing your spiritual fitness this year, and you’ll find yourself walking the path to a better, more transcendent, life..

It’ll do infinitely more for you than finally getting six-pack abs. I’ll be looking for you in the app.

Find the Crossroads Anywhere app here.

Thousands of people get unfiltered encouragement and challenge from me delivered to their inboxes. If you enjoyed or were challenged by this, subscribe for more at the bottom of the page or at To quote the great John McClane… “Welcome to the party, pal.”

Brian Tome
Meet the author

Brian Tome

Guiding you to the adventurous life you were made for. Adventurer, Author, Senior Pastor of Crossroads Church. More about Brian Tome.

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