What Is Love?

What is love? Here’s a hint, it isn’t just what we feel. Join us as Brian Tome explores what love is, and discover love bigger, brighter and more intense than we can imagine.

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    – Hey, I'm Kyle, and this is Crossroads
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    Now today we're going to
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    do something a little bit different.
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    We're going to hear directly from
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    our Senior Pastor, Brian Tome
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    live on stage at Crossroads Oakley.
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    Because I think this message is so important,
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    I want you to hear it together alongside
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    the rest of our community straight from Brian.
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    Towards the end, we're going to be
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    taking communion together as a community.
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    And traditionally that's bread and wine,
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    but I'm giving you a heads up now to say
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    grab something to eat and something to drink,
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    it'll do just fine.
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    Let's get started with Brian.
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    – Let's talk about what's on everyone's mind, shall we?
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    Private space flight,
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    that's what we all want to talk about.
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    Richard Branson paid his own way to space.
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    Jeff Bezos paid his own way to space.
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    They never had to apply to NASA
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    to be private astronauts
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    and never had to do an astronaut work out
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    and beat out a bunch of people
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    with sit ups and push ups.
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    Very, very smart people, very, very rich,
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    but never had to eat astronaut ice cream
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    or astronaut meatloaf.
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    And some people are really upset that these people
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    have the audacity to use their own kajillions
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    and actually fund their own space flight up into space.
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    One journalist, especially I ran across
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    this last week from USA Today, Soledad O'Brien.
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    Her headline was this:
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    So she says.
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    She goes on to question things
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    that are good things to think about.
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    Like, hmm, is this a thing just to build your own ego?
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    Are these resources appropriately being spent?
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    And specifically,
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    are journalists handling this appropriately?
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    Here's what she says:
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    Um, no, no, sorry, that's not the job of the media.
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    I mean, at least not in my communication classes,
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    my media classes and journalism classes,
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    and as a communication major in college,
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    the job of the media is not to represent
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    the powerless and bring down the powerful.
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    The job the media is to what?
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    To report the news, tell us what's going on.
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    It isn't to be indignant or judgmental
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    of somebody else's choices.
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    Now, I'm no journalism PhD major
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    and I don't run a newspaper, but I just think
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    that when we look at this we could probably
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    learn something about ourselves
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    and what our job is,
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    or specifically the job of the church,
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    the job of the capital C Church.
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    Not the job of the 501c3 church that
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    the country categorizes churches
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    like Crossroads for tax benefits.
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    But what is the job of the Church?
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    The Church as a body of people
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    that have been united with God the Father
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    through Jesus Christ's death on the Cross
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    and are filled with the Holy Spirit?
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    All of those folks, wherever they are this morning,
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    whatever they're doing, whatever
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    varied beliefs they have about baptism, whatever it is,
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    what is our job?
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    Our job is to love.
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    Love, love, lov.
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    Now it's important for us to take a look
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    at like macro, huge overarching themes
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    of the cosmos, the spiritual cosmos,
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    they're important for us before I go any further.
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    We have to understand that there is a God
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    and you're not Him and I'm not Him.
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    That's good news.
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    There's a God and we're not Him.
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    And we are separated from Him,
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    that's why we have different views,
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    opinions, convictions.
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    Now, the Bible, when it overarches this --
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    looks at this overarching plan
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    that we're dealing with, it shows us
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    and tells us that there is this thing
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    in our world that's infected and affected us.
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    It's called sin.
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    It caused us to think things
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    that we don't want to think,
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    caused us to believe things that we shouldn't believe,
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    causes us to do things that we don't want to do,
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    causes us to feel things that we don't want to feel,
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    that causes the rancor and the animosity
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    that we have inside of our country.
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    It causes things in our bodies to break down.
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    It causes our planet to break down.
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    It causes our emotions to break down.
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    And all of us are affected by this.
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    And it's a sign that we are in the midst
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    of being broken down while God wants to reunite us,
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    He wants to redeem us, to bring us closer to Him.
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    So Jesus comes to the world as God Himself,
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    who had a heavenly existence before Christmas ever happen.
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    He's born into Bethlehem
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    and He lives the perfect life as only
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    a man could who actually had the divine seed
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    because He was God before He was born,
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    coming into this world.
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    And therefore, when He goes to a cross
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    and when He dies a brutal death,
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    what's happening is God is crushing
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    and He's having ultimate victory through love,
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    through love on a Cross.
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    So that because of all my bad choices
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    and all my bad beliefs, all my bad feelings,
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    and all my bad actions, when I come to know Christ,
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    I don't get punished for those things.
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    The effects of that sin are not on me eternally.
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    Jesus has handled those because He loved me.
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    That is amazing. It's utterly stunning.
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    And this is what I want to look at today,
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    the rest of our time: What is love?
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    [music: What is Love? - Haddaway]
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    What is love?
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    Oh, baby, don't hurt. Don't hurt me no more.
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    – All right, enough of that.
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    What is love?
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    You love to see me dance
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    like a middle aged white man,
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    that's what love is, right?
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    Eesh. What is love?
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    I actually I really believe that our culture
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    has no idea what love is.
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    And when I say our culture, I'm not talking
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    about vast American culture that is
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    increasingly agnostic, atheistic.
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    I'm talking about culture of folks
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    who are in churches, in places like Crossroads.
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    What is love?
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    Love is not a soft, ethereal, philosophical
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    feeling that kind of washes over you.
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    It can wash over you.
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    It can be something that you feel.
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    And I'm incredibly thankful when I feel
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    and I sense the love of God.
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    But I feel and I sense the love of God
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    because of what God has done,
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    because of what God is doing.
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    Ephesians, and a bunch of verses I want
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    to share today talk about love
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    and why it is the core thing
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    of what we're supposed to be about.
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    It's a core thing of what our life
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    is supposed to be about is the very love of God.
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    And we can't get fuzzy on it.
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    Ephesians 3:17-19 says this:
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    So that Christ may dwell in your hearts
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    through faith – that you, being rooted and grounded
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    in judgmentalism -- Oh, no, it doesn't say that.
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    You being rooted and grounded in what is right. No.
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    You being rooted and grounded in
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    being seen as important. No.
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    You being rooted and grounded in love,
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    may have strength to comprehend with all the saints
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    what is the breadth and length and height and depth,
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    and to know the love of Christ
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    that surpasses knowledge,
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    that you may be filled with the fullness of God.
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    For me to have the fullness of God,
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    I've got to have an understanding
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    of the love of God and it is this
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    really hard, hard thing because
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    it's not possible for me understand the love of God.
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    I want to understand it more.
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    I want all of us to understand it more today.
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    But it's not possible because the love of God
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    surpasses human explanation,
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    it surpasses human understanding.
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    And here we hear the the four dimensions of love,
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    the breadth, the length, the height of God,
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    and the depth of God.
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    In sideways, long way, through all dimensions of God
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    and these dimensions, the dimensions of love
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    that we see in God are perfectly represented in Jesus.
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    And when we sense Him, His love for us,
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    however it comes to us.
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    Maybe it's because of something I say here,
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    maybe because some way somebody serves you
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    and when you they serve you,
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    you get a better understanding of who God is.
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    It's truly life changing when you understand
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    God's love for us you can weather the criticism
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    that other people have for you.
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    You can weather the needs that you have,
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    the other needs that you have,
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    and you can just continue to get by because
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    you have a love that's fueling you,
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    because you know that when God is for you
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    and God loves you, everything else falls in line.
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    In 1 Thessalonians 3:12, it says:
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    Increasing, abounding.
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    Romans 8:28 is a verse I've been thinking
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    about a lot and going in my mind a lot
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    over the last couple of weeks as there's been
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    just a bunch of cacophony of difficulty happening
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    around here and in my life.
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    And it says this:
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    God causes some things? No, all things.
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    God causes most things? No, all things.
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    God causes all things.
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    So no matter when I'm in a spot of difficulty
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    or when you're in a spot of difficulty,
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    when you love Him, when you love Him
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    and are called according to His purpose,
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    He causes all that stuff to work together for good.
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    It doesn't make you feel good necessarily right now,
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    but it will make good things happen in the future.
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    That is the love of God.
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    The problem isn't that we don't sense love.
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    I think the problem is we don't understand love.
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    And if we did understand love,
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    we might we might sense love more.
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    I'm just going to give you a few more versus
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    and I'm going to do a deep dive in one
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    that all of you have heard before, but probably
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    very few of us have actually had explained to us.
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    1 John 3:16: By this we know love.
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    How do we know love?
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    That he laid down his life for us,
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    and we ought to lay down our life for the brothers.
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    That's how we know love.
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    It's not a bunch of philosophical statements
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    about what love is and isn't.
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    I know love because Jesus laid down His love for me.
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    How do I know what I'm worth?
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    I know what I'm worth
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    because of what Jesus did for me.
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    How do you know what anything is worth, by the way?
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    How do you know what anything is worth?
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    How do you know what your house is worth?
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    Well, what someone will pay for it.
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    That's how you know what your house is worth,
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    what someone will pay for it.
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    And apparently people pay a lot for houses
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    these days, right?
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    I mean, people are talking about is it
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    a housing boom, it is a housing bust,
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    is the bubble going to burst?
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    The truth is, is your house worth as much as they say?
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    It is because people are buying houses
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    over asking price.
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    That's how you know the worth of what something is,
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    what someone is willing to pay for it.
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    And the worth of you and the worth of I
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    is what Jesus has paid for us.
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    God paid His son. He put his Son on a Cross.
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    This is how we know what love is.
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    This is how you know your worth is.
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    It's not how many followers we have
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    on Facebook or followers on Instagram
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    or how many nice things people say about us.
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    As wonderful as all those things are,
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    we know what love is based on the fact
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    that Jesus said you're worth sacrificing His life for.
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    That is crazy and beautiful and astounding.
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    Sometimes when I've gotten generosity
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    from somebody, whatever it is,
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    generosity of someone picks up my meal,
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    I didn't realize they were going to pick up my meal
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    or somebody, you know, I've had back before
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    we were in our very tough, tough financial straits,
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    people would give us their old cars
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    or somebody give whatever it is.
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    When people would give something to you,
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    they were inferring worth, they were giving love
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    because they were saying, you're worth that.
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    When God gives you what He gives you
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    and nothing better or higher than Jesus,
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    it should be the starting point of us sensing love.
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    And whether we feel love or not,
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    it doesn't matter if we feel it, you are loved.
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    God has loved you,
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    and history is altered because of that.
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    Yes, someone can get excited about that.
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    We all know that our feelings
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    don't always reflect reality. Right? Right?
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    And sometimes if we don't feel loved by God,
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    it doesn't mean that He doesn't love us,
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    there's just maybe layers of misunderstanding
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    or layers of difficulty and pain
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    that's keeping us from seeing and sensing it.
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    The Book of 1 Corinthians 13,
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    it gives the best full blooded explanation
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    of what love is and here's how it precedes.
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    It says this:
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    Where have you heard this verse before perhaps?
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    At a wedding.
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    It's hard for me to think of many weddings
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    that I've been to where 1 Corinthians 13
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    and the love verse doesn't follow,
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    Which is actually very strange when you think
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    about it because, you know, statistics say
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    that 50% of all new marriages end in divorce.
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    So this passage must not be helping people at churches.
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    It must not be helping people in weddings.
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    Something's wrong here.
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    I'll tell you what's wrong is not
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    the passage or the concept,
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    what's wrong is we're not doing it.
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    What's wrong is we read love passages
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    and we're thinking it's about feelings
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    and emotions and it's actually about actions,
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    actions that Jesus embodied by laying down
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    His life for you and I.
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    It says I can do all kinds of
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    amazing spiritual things,
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    but I don't have love, I'm nothing.
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    I can speak in a language, known as tongues,
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    the heavenly language, which I've never learned.
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    But if I don't love people in my own tongue
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    that they understand, I have nothing.
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    I can understand the cosmos it says
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    and have prophetic utterings and God give me visions
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    and hear the very words of God,
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    that may be true, actually.
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    But if I don't have love, I have nothing.
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    And then it says actually here
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    it's possible for me to be a missionary
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    and for me on the mission field,
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    going to some place that's very violent and hostile
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    to actually be killed for my faith.
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    And actually t not be my love that's propelling
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    me to be killed, it's my obstinacy.
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    No, you will not have me take my Bible.
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    You will not take it.
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    No, I will not recant Jesus.
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    And it's possible to say,
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    no, I will not recant Jesus, not out of love,
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    just because you're very obstinate.
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    You wouldn't recant your Chevy Suburban either.
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    It says it doesn't matter if I give up
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    my life as a martyr, if I don't have love,
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    I have nothing. Nothing.
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    So what is love?
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    That goes in and it continues out.
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    Now, here's what we can do, right?
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    We'll do some really wild.
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    We have these things, some of you
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    have these things called smartphones,
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    they're really wild.
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    You can, like, get any information you want anywhere.
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    And some of you have on your smartphone
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    an actual Bible app.
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    And even if you don't have that,
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    you can Google right now.
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    And I encourage you Google right now,
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    if you want to do this and follow along with me,
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    1 Corinthians 13 is what we're looking for.
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    And we're going to go literally verse by verse,
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    pretty much word for word.
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    And if you want to follow along,
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    you can do that on your device or maybe
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    you even brought an old fuddy-duddy paper Bible.
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    You won't be able to see it
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    because Crossroads is dark rooms,
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    but glad you brought your Bible today.
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    1 Corinthians 1, that's where.
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    I'm going to read out the ESV,
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    the English Standard Version.
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    If you want to read along or follow along,
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    here's what it says, 1 Corinthians 13:4.
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    What is love?
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    If you and I understand this form of love,
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    if you ever get married,
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    it will be an entirely different marriage
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    than one that doesn't end.
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    If you and I actually practice this form of love,
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    because that's what love is.
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    It's practices, it's attitudes, it's actions.
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    It's not feelings that happen to you.
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    If you and I can do this in our life,
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    we're going to sense a oneness with people around us,
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    a oneness with God that we can't get
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    when we're just being normal.
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    So what is love?
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    This is the best definition there is in the Bible.
  • 00:19:05
    Deep dive, let's look at it.
  • 00:19:07
    Patient. Love is patient.
  • 00:19:30
    I'm making you be patient right now.
  • 00:19:34
    When are we patient, right?
  • 00:19:37
    Like, hold on, someone's are talking,
  • 00:19:40
    I'm not talking, time for me to go to my phone.
  • 00:19:43
    We lose the ability to be patient.
  • 00:19:47
    But when someone is patient with you,
  • 00:19:49
    like just now, I could sense there was
  • 00:19:51
    a good number of you who were patient, like,
  • 00:19:52
    "OK, Brian's going to speak at some moment."
  • 00:19:56
    The fact that you're waiting
  • 00:19:57
    made me actually feel loved, like,
  • 00:19:59
    oh, you actually trust me,
  • 00:20:00
    you're actually going to hang in there with me.
  • 00:20:03
    Love is patient. It waits.
  • 00:20:09
    It bears. It hangs in there. It's patient.
  • 00:20:14
    Love is kind. It is patient, love is kind.
  • 00:20:21
    Last couple of weeks have been been
  • 00:20:23
    a bit stressful for me, and I had a friend
  • 00:20:26
    come to my house last week and he came down,
  • 00:20:30
    knocked on my door and he brought a cooler of beer.
  • 00:20:33
    And we just sat on my front porch
  • 00:20:36
    and drank some beers.
  • 00:20:40
    That was love. That was love.
  • 00:20:43
    That wasn't anything other than that.
  • 00:20:46
    He thought about me.
  • 00:20:48
    He went and got something.
  • 00:20:50
    He brought something to me and then we just sat
  • 00:20:53
    and talked, or sat and were still,
  • 00:20:58
    or sat and laughed.
  • 00:20:59
    And there was kindness.
  • 00:21:02
    When he showed kindness to me, I felt loved by Mikey.
  • 00:21:10
    It's a wonderful thing.
  • 00:21:12
    It's a beautiful thing when you know your loved
  • 00:21:14
    and someone shows it, they show it.
  • 00:21:18
    They can't show you your feelings
  • 00:21:20
    or throw your feelings, but when someone
  • 00:21:22
    does something in this kind it's a beautiful thing.
  • 00:21:30
    Love doesn't envy.
  • 00:21:36
    When I envy what somebody has: their truck,
  • 00:21:41
    their house, their kids, their job,
  • 00:21:46
    their, you know, their physique,
  • 00:21:49
    when I'm envying that thing,
  • 00:21:50
    I'm thinking about that thing
  • 00:21:53
    and I'm not thinking about them.
  • 00:21:56
    I'm thinking about that object
  • 00:21:57
    or that attribute that they have.
  • 00:22:00
    And objects and attributes aren't things
  • 00:22:03
    that you love, people are things you love.
  • 00:22:05
    That's the insidiousness of envy
  • 00:22:08
    as we have a culture that is constantly
  • 00:22:11
    selling us 24/7 and constantly lifting
  • 00:22:14
    each other up about how good we're doing
  • 00:22:15
    and you're not.
  • 00:22:16
    It puts us in constant comparison mode.
  • 00:22:20
    And when I'm comparing, I don't love.
  • 00:22:22
    I can't envy, I can't compare
  • 00:22:28
    and love at the same time.
  • 00:22:32
    This is why the ancient Catholic Church
  • 00:22:34
    and actually still modern Catholic Church
  • 00:22:35
    was big on, you know, nunnery robes
  • 00:22:38
    and all that stuff, robes.
  • 00:22:40
    It wasn't like we want to set you apart as so much as,
  • 00:22:43
    hey, when you come into the monastery,
  • 00:22:45
    we all dress the same so we can't envy
  • 00:22:48
    what one another are wearing
  • 00:22:49
    or we can't even notice one another's physique
  • 00:22:52
    because we're going to love each other
  • 00:22:54
    and not compare ourselves to one another.
  • 00:22:55
    That was the heart behind
  • 00:22:57
    many of those ancient vestments.
  • 00:23:01
    Love doesn't envy.
  • 00:23:03
    Love doesn't boast.
  • 00:23:07
    The next example of love, love doesn't boast.
  • 00:23:10
    When I boast, I'm exalting myself.
  • 00:23:13
    And when I'm exalting myself, what am I not doing?
  • 00:23:15
    I'm not loving you.
  • 00:23:17
    When I spend time thinking about
  • 00:23:19
    how to sneak in my accomplishments
  • 00:23:21
    or sneak in my, whatever it is,
  • 00:23:23
    my discipline, whatever it may be.
  • 00:23:25
    When I'm thinking about that, I'm lifting myself up.
  • 00:23:29
    I'm not humbling myself.
  • 00:23:30
    Jesus humbled Himself and went to a cross.
  • 00:23:33
    He actually got exalted in the grand scheme of things.
  • 00:23:36
    God exalted Him and gave Him the name above every name
  • 00:23:40
    because he humbled Himself, He lowered Himself
  • 00:23:44
    and died of death, even death on a Cross.
  • 00:23:51
    Arrogance, love is not arrogant.
  • 00:23:54
    Arrogance never allows ourselves
  • 00:23:58
    to believe that we're wrong.
  • 00:24:00
    Arrogance always causes us to believe
  • 00:24:02
    it's somebody else's problem.
  • 00:24:04
    Arrogance causes us to actually not listen
  • 00:24:07
    to somebody because somebody else is a less than.
  • 00:24:13
    We can't think somebody else is less than
  • 00:24:15
    if we're loving them.
  • 00:24:18
    I mean, all of us are less than
  • 00:24:20
    the very son of God Himself. All of us are.
  • 00:24:23
    And yet Jesus didn't act as if we were less thans.
  • 00:24:28
    Jesus acted as if we were worthy.
  • 00:24:30
    He chose to believe that we're worthy.
  • 00:24:33
    Love is not rude. Love is not rude.
  • 00:24:38
    How do you build a following on social media,
  • 00:24:41
    especially Twitter?
  • 00:24:43
    By being rude, right?
  • 00:24:45
    Who can say the most bombastic statements?
  • 00:24:49
    Who can say the things that their group
  • 00:24:52
    wants to believe and say it, and it's rude
  • 00:24:55
    and it's punchy and it's a pitiful,
  • 00:24:58
    undefensible way as possible?
  • 00:25:00
    It's rudeness.
  • 00:25:02
    Rudeness, it always dehumanizes other people.
  • 00:25:06
    It always forces us to think
  • 00:25:08
    that someone else is less than us.
  • 00:25:12
    No, that person is a masterpiece,
  • 00:25:17
    a masterpiece by God,
  • 00:25:19
    uniquely formed together by God
  • 00:25:20
    that looks different than me.
  • 00:25:24
    I have to think about these things
  • 00:25:25
    when I am on a plane.
  • 00:25:30
    When I'm on the plane, I don't travel
  • 00:25:33
    business coach class unless I got enough mileage
  • 00:25:36
    to get, you know, put up there.
  • 00:25:38
    So most of the time I am slumming it
  • 00:25:41
    with the normal regular folks like myself.
  • 00:25:44
    And what's the worst part about
  • 00:25:46
    being back with all the normal people?
  • 00:25:48
    The normal size of the seats,
  • 00:25:50
    that's the worst part, right?
  • 00:25:52
    You know, you sit there,
  • 00:25:53
    you sit there in those seats.
  • 00:25:55
    And if you have a person beside you.
  • 00:25:58
    Let me just clear some things up, everybody.
  • 00:26:00
    In case you don't know this,
  • 00:26:02
    that little armrest in between,
  • 00:26:04
    you know what that is?
  • 00:26:05
    That's a barrier. That's what that is.
  • 00:26:08
    That's not meant to rest your arm on.
  • 00:26:10
    That is a barrier that says your area is there
  • 00:26:13
    and my areas here.
  • 00:26:15
    And that armrest comes down
  • 00:26:17
    and it draws the invisible line down on the ground.
  • 00:26:20
    So here's the way it works.
  • 00:26:21
    If you're to sit beside me, that's a barrier.
  • 00:26:23
    That means I don't want your elbow
  • 00:26:25
    over that barrier on my barrier.
  • 00:26:27
    Like, you can, like, rest up against it if you want.
  • 00:26:30
    You can maybe -- I'll even let you
  • 00:26:32
    put your arm on top of it,
  • 00:26:34
    but you darn well better not have anything over it.
  • 00:26:40
    And the last time I was on a plane
  • 00:26:41
    a couple weeks ago, someone didn't understand this.
  • 00:26:45
    They don't understand this,
  • 00:26:46
    Someone was an incredibly unloving person.
  • 00:26:48
    They were very rude. They're very arrogant.
  • 00:26:53
    And they were like over mine.
  • 00:26:55
    And their foot was over on my side.
  • 00:27:00
    Come on.
  • 00:27:02
    And when that's happened, when I'm annoyed,
  • 00:27:04
    when I'm bothered, I have to remember
  • 00:27:09
    God made that person.
  • 00:27:12
    Jesus died for that person.
  • 00:27:15
    And if Jesus die on a Cross out of love for me,
  • 00:27:20
    out of love, I cannot punch that person
  • 00:27:22
    because they have their elbow over my thing.
  • 00:27:25
    I can choose to not do that.
  • 00:27:30
    But if I'm just thinking about the etiquette of it
  • 00:27:33
    and how I am wronged
  • 00:27:35
    and how this person is not thinking,
  • 00:27:37
    it never does mean anything.
  • 00:27:39
    I have to think about the love,
  • 00:27:41
    that God loves this person
  • 00:27:43
    and I need to love this person,
  • 00:27:46
    even though they're inconveniencing me right now.
  • 00:27:50
    And I need to not insist on my own way.
  • 00:27:52
    That's what says:
  • 00:27:53
    love does not insist on your own way.
  • 00:27:56
    It doesn't mean that you abandon God's way.
  • 00:28:00
    It doesn't mean that you say
  • 00:28:02
    every way is OK with God.
  • 00:28:04
    Doesn't mean that.
  • 00:28:05
    We keep -- we have this thing in our culture,
  • 00:28:08
    we talk about, "Well, this is my truth.
  • 00:28:10
    This is my truth."
  • 00:28:11
    I wish we would say,"This is my beliefs.
  • 00:28:14
    This is my conviction."
  • 00:28:15
    No one owns the truth. God is truth.
  • 00:28:18
    And I can't have a truth that's different from your truth.
  • 00:28:20
    I can have an opinion that's different than yours.
  • 00:28:22
    I can have a belief that's different than yours.
  • 00:28:24
    I can have a conviction different than yours.
  • 00:28:26
    But there's only one truth and God owns it.
  • 00:28:29
    And here's the crazy thing, even when
  • 00:28:33
    I believe that I'm understand the truth,
  • 00:28:36
    I don't have to insist on my own way.
  • 00:28:39
    I don't have to insist that we do pizza
  • 00:28:41
    instead of Chinese, I don't have to insist on that.
  • 00:28:45
    I don't have to insist on my own way
  • 00:28:47
    of what we do with our date night.
  • 00:28:48
    I don't have to insist on that.
  • 00:28:51
    A loving person will give way
  • 00:28:54
    to people who are around them.
  • 00:28:56
    A loving person will regularly roll over
  • 00:28:58
    and allow the other person's desires to happen.
  • 00:29:01
    That's part of what love is.
  • 00:29:04
    Love is not irritable and resentful,
  • 00:29:09
    irritable and resentful.
  • 00:29:11
    Is there anybody in America not irritated right now?
  • 00:29:15
    Is there anybody in America not resentful right now?
  • 00:29:18
    I mean, whatever it is,
  • 00:29:20
    the idiots who aren't getting vaccinated
  • 00:29:21
    or the idiots who are vaccinated.
  • 00:29:24
    Or the -- I heard a new on this most recently,
  • 00:29:27
    The plan-demic, the plan-demic.
  • 00:29:32
    Or Simone Biles, how could you possibly
  • 00:29:36
    let down America the greatest gymnast of all time?
  • 00:29:40
    Really honestly. Wow.
  • 00:29:43
    Like we're in perpetual as a culture
  • 00:29:45
    irritability and resentfulness all the time.
  • 00:29:50
    And I don't know about you, but I always have
  • 00:29:53
    a justifiable reason to be resentful.
  • 00:29:56
    Always do.
  • 00:29:58
    And my resentfulness and my irritability,
  • 00:30:01
    I'll just be very honest with you,
  • 00:30:04
    it is based on the truth of God.
  • 00:30:06
    I'll just say right now,
  • 00:30:09
    it is based on the truth of God, I think.
  • 00:30:15
    But it doesn't matter.
  • 00:30:17
    I am to love, which means I am not
  • 00:30:19
    to be someone who's known as being irritable
  • 00:30:23
    and being resentful because I know the love of God,
  • 00:30:27
    because of who God is.
  • 00:30:29
    And let me tell you what,
  • 00:30:30
    it is a wonderful thing that
  • 00:30:31
    God is not resentful towards me.
  • 00:30:32
    [applause]
  • 00:30:36
    And let me tell you, I do more than enough
  • 00:30:38
    things to make got irritated with me,
  • 00:30:42
    and yet He's not irritated with me.
  • 00:30:45
    Even when I'm wrong, He causes all things,
  • 00:30:48
    what things?
  • 00:30:50
    All things to work together for my good because
  • 00:30:52
    I'm called and I love Him according to His purpose.
  • 00:30:57
    And God's just asking me out of love to give
  • 00:31:01
    other folks a fraction of what He has given me.
  • 00:31:06
    Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing.
  • 00:31:11
    Ah-ha! Such a hypocrite.
  • 00:31:14
    How many times do we have to hear:
  • 00:31:15
    You're such a hypocrite or we're such --?
  • 00:31:17
    We love to find people who are hypocrites
  • 00:31:19
    defined as you did something that I think that
  • 00:31:22
    you don't believe in and we actually rejoice at it
  • 00:31:26
    and we love to stoke up the negative feelings.
  • 00:31:30
    Love bears all things.
  • 00:31:34
    I think Crossroads is the most loving
  • 00:31:38
    community I've ever been a part of.
  • 00:31:40
    And let me tell you why I think that is,
  • 00:31:42
    is because you bear with me, that's why.
  • 00:31:45
    You bear with me.
  • 00:31:47
    I ride my motorcycle in here some days
  • 00:31:49
    and I ride and I choose not to have a helmet on.
  • 00:31:53
    And you bear with me.
  • 00:31:54
    You know, the Bible says nothing about helmets.
  • 00:31:59
    Though it may be a good idea,
  • 00:32:01
    and most of the time, whenever I'm on a trip,
  • 00:32:03
    I always wear one, but I'm just going like --
  • 00:32:04
    you bear with, you go like,
  • 00:32:08
    "That's not a choice I would make.
  • 00:32:11
    It's probably not a good choice,
  • 00:32:14
    but I'm just not going to get upset about it.
  • 00:32:17
    I'm going to bear with you."
  • 00:32:19
    I had a pastor a while ago, who he said to me,
  • 00:32:23
    "Brian, if I said things in a closed door meeting
  • 00:32:29
    that you say on stage, I would get fired."
  • 00:32:33
    He was serious about that.
  • 00:32:36
    There is a thing in many places
  • 00:32:38
    you just can't say this,
  • 00:32:40
    you can't say that word, you can't do that.
  • 00:32:42
    And some of those things may be good moral choices,
  • 00:32:47
    but when you love someone, you bear with all things.
  • 00:32:52
    And when someone bears with me
  • 00:32:55
    over my rough spots, because I've got them,
  • 00:32:56
    it make me want to bear with you
  • 00:32:59
    over your rough spots,
  • 00:33:01
    because I know you got them too.
  • 00:33:03
    And when someone bears with you,
  • 00:33:06
    you know they love you.
  • 00:33:08
    And when you know someone loves you,
  • 00:33:10
    you start to feel love, right?
  • 00:33:15
    Love hopes all things. Hopes all things.
  • 00:33:23
    We as a country are so cynical.
  • 00:33:26
    We just think our best days are behind us.
  • 00:33:29
    We think the Chinese are overtaking us
  • 00:33:32
    in economic might and power.
  • 00:33:33
    We think that the government's getting worse and worse.
  • 00:33:36
    We're convinced that if someone gets elected
  • 00:33:38
    who I didn't vote for, it's going down, down, down.
  • 00:33:41
    We're convinced that things are getting
  • 00:33:44
    worse and worse and worse and worse and worse.
  • 00:33:46
    And just one example of last week
  • 00:33:48
    when we looked at what's happened to poverty.
  • 00:33:50
    Did you see those statistics?
  • 00:33:51
    That is unbelievable what's happening with world hunger.
  • 00:33:55
    Things are getting better.
  • 00:33:57
    When you believe that everything is getting worse,
  • 00:34:00
    when you believe that something can't get better,
  • 00:34:02
    you've lost hope,
  • 00:34:03
    and hope and love goes hand in hand.
  • 00:34:07
    Because love believes the best about somebody.
  • 00:34:11
    Love chooses to see the best about somebody.
  • 00:34:13
    Love chooses to believe that there is a God
  • 00:34:15
    who loved me and died on the Cross for me
  • 00:34:17
    and that God isn't done dying for me
  • 00:34:19
    and that God hasn't forgotten about me,
  • 00:34:21
    because in fact, God causes all things.
  • 00:34:23
    What things? All things to work together for good
  • 00:34:27
    for those who love Him
  • 00:34:29
    and are called according to His purpose.
  • 00:34:31
    But when we start to lose hope, we always lose love.
  • 00:34:36
    And conversely, when we lose love,
  • 00:34:38
    we always lose hope.
  • 00:34:40
    Love endures all things. Love endures all things.
  • 00:34:48
    It endures when someone gossips.
  • 00:34:52
    It endures financial ruin.
  • 00:34:56
    It endures hurtful, awful words
  • 00:34:59
    that someone says to us or about us.
  • 00:35:02
    It endures, it just keeps going on.
  • 00:35:06
    And maybe one of the reasons why
  • 00:35:07
    there's so many folks who are abandoning the faith
  • 00:35:10
    is that they've lacked love that has
  • 00:35:16
    as its necessity an enduring quality.
  • 00:35:21
    Because love endures.
  • 00:35:25
    I love what Billy Graham said.
  • 00:35:28
    He says: It's the Holy Spirit's job to convict,
  • 00:35:31
    the Father's job to judge, and my job to love.
  • 00:35:39
    That doesn't mean when I do something
  • 00:35:42
    like here from stage, I'm going to say things
  • 00:35:44
    and teach things that are in the scriptures
  • 00:35:46
    that are going to sting.
  • 00:35:48
    It doesn't mean we shouldn't talk to our friends
  • 00:35:50
    and challenge them appropriately
  • 00:35:51
    from time to time over the choices
  • 00:35:53
    if we feel like God is upset about it.
  • 00:35:54
    It doesn't mean those things at all,
  • 00:35:56
    but it means that our life
  • 00:35:59
    has to be emanating the love of God
  • 00:36:02
    and having His presence in our life.
  • 00:36:06
    And I think we miss this.
  • 00:36:08
    We love our dog. We love our car.
  • 00:36:10
    We love our job. We love the Olympics.
  • 00:36:12
    We love whatever and this word love just
  • 00:36:15
    gets to mean to not be all these things
  • 00:36:18
    that we've just talked about today.
  • 00:36:21
    1 John 3:16, I'm going to invite the bands
  • 00:36:23
    to all come up to our stages.
  • 00:36:26
    We're going to take communion.
  • 00:36:27
    And this passage is not
  • 00:36:31
    a traditional communion passage,
  • 00:36:32
    but is a great love passage
  • 00:36:34
    and that's what communion is.
  • 00:36:36
    I'm going to read it for us.
  • 00:37:03
    And we do this because Jesus loved us
  • 00:37:06
    in deed and in truth.
  • 00:37:10
    The night that He was arrested,
  • 00:37:14
    the night that He was actually sweating blood,
  • 00:37:17
    He was sweating blood and stressed out
  • 00:37:19
    and He said to the Father,
  • 00:37:20
    "I don't want to do this cross thing."
  • 00:37:22
    He understood what His calling was at that moment
  • 00:37:25
    that He was to go and have an awful, brutal death.
  • 00:37:29
    If he understand it before,
  • 00:37:30
    He understood at that moment.
  • 00:37:31
    But He says, "But not My will be done,
  • 00:37:34
    but Your will be done," because that's what love does.
  • 00:37:37
    Love bears all things. Love endures all things.
  • 00:37:45
    And at that Last Supper, He took the bread.
  • 00:37:49
    And a few have received Christ,
  • 00:37:51
    if you've received the love of Christ,
  • 00:37:53
    communion is something that solidifies your faith.
  • 00:37:56
    And maybe you haven't received the love of Christ.
  • 00:37:59
    Maybe you haven't received Jesus
  • 00:38:00
    for Him to be the sacrifice for your sin.
  • 00:38:04
    If you haven't, you can do that right now.
  • 00:38:06
    Just say something like,
  • 00:38:08
    God, I want you in my life.
  • 00:38:10
    Jesus, I ask that you would fill me
  • 00:38:13
    with Your Spirit and I commit my life to you. Amen.
  • 00:38:24
    Then you remember it by moments like this.
  • 00:38:26
    Jesus took the bread and said,
  • 00:38:28
    when you gather together -- this is a paraphrase --
  • 00:38:32
    I want you to remember My love for you,
  • 00:38:35
    because as you break that bread,
  • 00:38:37
    you are going to remember
  • 00:38:40
    how I broke My body out of love for you.
  • 00:38:43
    The body of Christ, lovingly broken for you.
  • 00:38:48
    Take and eat.
  • 00:38:54
    Then you can take that next top part off
  • 00:38:57
    so we have the juice underneath.
  • 00:39:03
    And that it said that Jesus then took the cup.
  • 00:39:07
    He says this cup signifies the blood
  • 00:39:10
    of the loving covenant I have with you.
  • 00:39:13
    And as Jesus has frayed back
  • 00:39:16
    on a wooden cross going up and down
  • 00:39:18
    with a puddle of blood coming
  • 00:39:22
    all the way down to the ground.
  • 00:39:24
    He said this is how much I love you.
  • 00:39:27
    This is how much you are loved
  • 00:39:30
    by a Heavenly Father who saw you
  • 00:39:33
    and thought of you a long time ago
  • 00:39:36
    and is still doing it today because He loves you.
  • 00:39:40
    This isn't my opinion.
  • 00:39:42
    This is the Bible's central teaching
  • 00:39:44
    we've looked at today because He loves you,
  • 00:39:46
    whether you feel it right now or not.
  • 00:39:48
    And I hope that you can feel it, He loves you.
  • 00:39:51
    It doesn't matter what you did last night
  • 00:39:53
    with somebody sexually.
  • 00:39:54
    It didn't matter what you didn't do this last week
  • 00:39:57
    that you should have done for somebody else.
  • 00:39:59
    It doesn't matter the things --
  • 00:40:00
    He looks at you where you are right now and says,
  • 00:40:02
    "Yeah, I died for that and I love you.
  • 00:40:04
    Your actions don't change the way I love you."
  • 00:40:10
    The blood of Christ shed for you as love.
  • 00:40:13
    Take and drink.
  • 00:40:21
    God, we are trusting and asking
  • 00:40:25
    that Your love would shower on us.
  • 00:40:28
    Actually, I feel and pray that You give us
  • 00:40:30
    the blessing of understanding Your love,
  • 00:40:31
    because I know Your love has showered on us.
  • 00:40:36
    We want to tell you that we love You
  • 00:40:38
    and our love doesn't come close
  • 00:40:40
    to what Your love is for us,
  • 00:40:41
    and we can't come close to even understanding
  • 00:40:44
    the breadth, the length, the height,
  • 00:40:47
    the depth of Your love.
  • 00:40:48
    I can't even explain it.
  • 00:40:50
    God, I ask forgiveness for not explaining it well.
  • 00:40:53
    I ask forgiveness for my frailty of mind
  • 00:40:54
    and my frailty of tongue because it's too great
  • 00:40:58
    and too wonderful for me to understand
  • 00:40:59
    and even describe.
  • 00:41:02
    But we trust that we've at least gotten
  • 00:41:03
    a few drops of it in our minds and our hearts today.
  • 00:41:08
    We pray these things and we sing these things
  • 00:41:10
    in your name, Amen.
  • 00:41:14
    – Thanks, Brian.
  • 00:41:15
    Whatever I hear a message like that,
  • 00:41:17
    I have the same question in my mind to God,
  • 00:41:20
    it's just, God, what do you want me to do now?
  • 00:41:23
    I've actually got two ways for you
  • 00:41:25
    to respond to the message you just heard.
  • 00:41:27
    One, you might have heard that message of love
  • 00:41:29
    and feel compelled to give.
  • 00:41:31
    If that's where you are,
  • 00:41:32
    we want to come alongside you and support you
  • 00:41:34
    in that because we recognize
  • 00:41:35
    that trusting God with your finances is scary.
  • 00:41:38
    So we developed a thing called
  • 00:41:40
    the Tithe Test to support you in that.
  • 00:41:42
    It works like this, you try tithing for 90 days,
  • 00:41:45
    and if at the end of those 90 days
  • 00:41:47
    you don't experience more of God in your life,
  • 00:41:49
    more joy, more peace, things like that,
  • 00:41:52
    we'll give you all of your money back.
  • 00:41:54
    To sign up for it
  • 00:41:55
    you just go to Crossroads.net/tithetest.
  • 00:41:58
    A second way to respond might just be
  • 00:42:00
    to tell God who He is.
  • 00:42:02
    Say, God, Your love is something
  • 00:42:04
    I can't find anywhere else.
  • 00:42:06
    We're going to do that right now through worship.
  • 00:42:09
    We're going to sing a brand new song
  • 00:42:10
    that our band just wrote and released
  • 00:42:12
    called Unbreakable.
  • 00:42:13
    It talks about this incredible truth
  • 00:42:15
    that the same spirit who raised Jesus from the dead
  • 00:42:18
    can be alive in us.
  • 00:46:25
    – Awesome to be with you today.
  • 00:46:26
    If you like that song,
  • 00:46:27
    you can find it wherever you stream your music.
  • 00:46:30
    It's called Unbreakable.
  • 00:46:31
    We'll see you next week.

Process, journal or discuss the themes of this article - here's a few questions to get the ball rolling...

Welcome to the Weekend Follow-Up. The questions below are for the weekend of July 31 & Aug 1 2021.

  1. Would you rather go to space or travel to your favorite vacation spot?

  2. Read 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7. How do you see (or not see) the characteristics of love within yourself?

  3. Read 1 John 3:16-18. What’s a moment you’ve experienced sacrificial love in your life? Describe how that love impacted or changed you.

  4. Read 1 Corinthians 16:14. Love is more than feeling, it’s action. What’s a specific way you can love someone in your life this week?

  5. Now close your time in prayer. Here’s an example: “Jesus, thank you for giving your life for ours, for loving us. You not only saved us, you showed us what we are worthy of love. Give us the strength and the compassion to follow Your example. Help us understand Your love more. Examine our hearts and replace our human attitudes with attitudes of love. We love you Jesus. Amen.

More from the Weekend

Read John 1:14. At Crossroads we’re about the power of God who transforms lives. Everyday we’re getting outside ourselves trying to make a difference in the world. One way we do this is partnering with organizations who literally are changing the world everyday. If you want to jump in and start giving risk free, you can try the 90 day tithe test here. To hear more about God’s love, you can listen to our new worship song “Unbreakable.

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Aug 1, 2021 47 mins 23 sec

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